Bill Maher Quotes About Side

Browse 12 famous quotes of Bill Maher about Side.

"New Rule: You can't bum-rush the president for autographs after he just lectured you for an hour about how you have to grow up. Have some dignity, for Christ's sake. He's your coworker, not Hannah Montana. If you're this crazy about him now, what are you going to do if he turns the country around, ask him to sign your tit?" ~ Bill Maher
"Sticking one's head in the sand is a deep human impulse. Like when you feel some kind of bump or growth on the back of your neck, and your heart jumps, because, Christ, that could be something bad, I should see a doctor right away. But then you don't, because it's too scary, and what if they do find something, and...and besides: maybe it will just go away!" ~ Bill Maher
"It's amazing. TV used to give Americans the reverse fantasy: What if you, normal person, suddenly became a millionaire? Now it's "Oh, who are we kidding? You consider yourself lucky to hold on to your job deep-frying chicken parts, but how'd you like to be briefly introduced to a millionaire? Would you like that? You can even touch his garments!" And people watch this shit and find it inspirational." ~ Bill Maher
"Isn't it time we asked ourselves, are we willing to accept any behavior codified within religious or cultural practice? Is there no line to be drawn? If honor killings are okay, then why not virgin sacrifices or cannibalism or sex with children outside the church? We have perversely taken our notion of tolerance to such extremes that we've become tolerant of intolerance." ~ Bill Maher
"We should stop worrying so much about the price of gasoline and start considering its cost. You really want to be patriotic? Don't change your car by putting a flag on it, change the car." ~ Bill Maher
"New Rule: If an Evangelical tries to use Halloween to pimp Jesus to kids, they get to egg his house. On Halloween, the president of the American Family Association urged his flock to hand out a Christian-based comic book instead of candy. Excuse me, Halloween isn't a time to push your beliefs. You don't see me handing out pot to kids...Okay, well not the little kids." ~ Bill Maher
"New Rule: It's okay for the president to play ball in the house. It's easy to judge and say this scene detracts from the dignity of the White House--until you consider the end zone is between Clinton's semen stain and where Bush OD'd on a pretzel." ~ Bill Maher
"New Rule: Stop leaving couches on the sidewalk. Besides being lazy and ugly, it's animal cruelty. You teach your dog not to pee on the couch, and then when you take him to the place he's supposed to pee, there's a couch." ~ Bill Maher
"Faced with our addiction to oil, what does our leadership say? Get more of it! Strange when you consider their answer to drug dependence is to cut off the supply." ~ Bill Maher
"New Rule: If you married a manic-depressive, three of your children died, and while you were president civil war broke out and someone shot you in the head, your coin really shouldn't say, "In God We Trust." ~ Bill Maher
"We were asked to do very little, and we responded. That's the bargain we tacitly make with our presidents: we won't ask too much of you, if you don't ask too much of us." ~ Bill Maher
"We preach about capitalism and the beauty of unfettered market forces determining price--but not when it comes to gas. When it comes to gas, we need it cheap, and the president had better get it for us, or else, we don't care how." ~ Bill Maher
Quotes About side

Today's Quote

Nick was waiting for him.Gabriel hesitated. He wished those text messages had come with some kind of sign, whether Nick was pissed or exasperated or just completely done with him. Hell, a freaking emoticon would have been helpful.His own room sat pitch-dark at the opposite end of the hallway. A black hole. Gabriel eased around the creaky spot in the floor and slid past his twin's room. Once in his own, he flung his duffel bag onto the ground and shut the door, closing the dark around himself. He sighed and kicked his shoes into the well of blackness under the bed. Maybe Nick hadn't heard him. Maybe he thought he was still out in the car."You are so predictable."Gabriel swore and fumbled for the light switch.Nick was straddling his desk chair backward, his arms folded on the backrest."What the hell is wrong with you?" Gabriel snapped. "Why are you sitting here in the dark?"His twin shrugged. Because I knew you'd walk right past my room."
Author: Brigid Kemmerer

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