Jarod Kintz Quotes About Roll

Browse 13 famous quotes of Jarod Kintz about Roll.

"A brick could be slid on a wood floor, like a rolling bowling ball, in an attempt to fill the seconds between swallows of beer." ~ Jarod Kintz
"I want to be a matador in the bull market, but not so I can make a killing. Rather, I just want to wear flamboyant and form-fitting pants that emphasize my genitalia as I stroll down Wall Street." ~ Jarod Kintz
"Eating a plain bagel with no cream cheese is like eating the inner tube of a bicycle tire, and I'd rather ride my roller skates to work." ~ Jarod Kintz
"I nearly ran him over after he ran out in front of my car. So I slammed on the brakes, rolled down my window, and said, "Do you realize I could have killed you?" "It was stupid of me to run out in front of you," he said. "Yeah, it was," I replied. "But I'm not talking about now. Last Tuesday I could have killed you. Had you in the scope of my rifle, but I let you live. Now THAT was stupid." ~ Jarod Kintz
"The months roll by like wheels on a wheelchair. Pretty soon it'll be July. Feels like just last month it was May." ~ Jarod Kintz
"I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning." ~ Jarod Kintz
"This morning my girlfriend was so loud in bed that we woke up the neighbors. So I told them to roll over and go back to sleep." ~ Jarod Kintz
"A politician's autobiography is a book that's nothing more than a collection of paper, like toilet paper, only it's stacked instead of rolled." ~ Jarod Kintz
"The best birthday present I ever got from my grandpa was a skinny black tie. It didn't come in a bag, a box, or even rolled up in tissue paper. It came wrapped in wisdom. As soon as he gave it to me he said, "A tie would make a stronger impression on your boss if you used it as a blindfold and kidnapped him. That‘s why I bought you a black one." ~ Jarod Kintz
"Bricks could have been used to stop Napoleon's army from advancing into Russia. And blankets could have been used to keep Napoleon rolling in victories." ~ Jarod Kintz
"Certain words roll off the tongue like frozen balls of saliva. Words like sure, positive, and definite." ~ Jarod Kintz
"I want to write a poem about "Truth," "Honor," "Dignity," and whether the toilet paper should roll over or under when you pull on it." ~ Jarod Kintz
"If I could fly, life would be amazing. But paraplegic people say the same thing about walking, and I freaking hate walking. Somebody might ask me, "Hey, do you want to go for a walk?" and I'll reply, "Nope. But I do want to have a seat on a chair with wheels and roll along with you." So maybe flight isn't so cool after all. Possibly birds get pissed off they have to fly everywhere." ~ Jarod Kintz
Quotes About roll

Today's Quote

It's what she does, Ms. Morgan.' Mr. Solomon's eyes found mine, but there was a change in him somehow. ‘Running,' he added. ‘Of course, technically, her pattern is to do something to get kicked out, but that's not an option now, so she's taken matters into her own hands. Do you know what I'm saying, Ms. Morgan?'But sadly, I didn't.‘Sometimes people run...to see if you'll come after them."
Author: Ally Carter

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