Top Absurd Quotes

Browse top 883 famous quotes and sayings about Absurd by most favorite authors.

Favorite Absurd Quotes

1. "Life is a story and god is author.life is absurd.I think so."
Author: Albert Camus
2. "Knowing whether or not man is free involves knowing whether he can have a master. The absurdity peculiar to this problem comes from the fact that the very notion that makes the problem of freedom possible also takes away all its meaning. For in the presence of God there is less a problem of freedom than a problem of evil. You know the alternative: either we are not free and God the all-powerful is responsible for evil. Or we are free and responsible but God is not all powerful. All the scholastic subtleties have neither added anything to nor subtracted anything from the acuteness of this paradox."
Author: Albert Camus
3. "Le règlement, pensait Rivière, est semblable aux rites d'une religion qui semblent absurdes mais façonnent les hommes. (p. 46)"
Author: Antoine De Saint Exupéry
4. "And to this world, to this scene of tormented and agonised beings, who only continue to exist by devouring each other, in which, therefore, every ravenous beast is the living grave of thousands of others, and its self-maintenance is a chain of painful deaths; and in which the capacity for feeling pain increases with knowledge, and therefore reaches its highest degree in man, a degree which is the higher the more intelligent the man is; to this world it has been sought to apply the system of optimism, and demonstrate to us that it is the best of all possible worlds. The absurdity is glaring."
Author: Arthur Schopenhauer
5. "I grew up with all these hippies. Ten of them and one of me. None of them wanted to work and spent all their time talking and dreaming and fooling around. 90% of that hippie stuff is just bullshit but the ideals of that generation were very beautiful and powerful and rebellious. I had to dress and feed myself from the time I was six, which meant I became a very organised person. But there came a point when I was about seven or eight, when I saw the absurdity of living in a commune and I said to them, "Why don't you just DO SOMETHING!?"
Author: Björk
6. "It will seem to many persons very inconsistent with their ideas of the dignity of a spirit that they should appear and act in the manner I have described, and shall describe further; and I have heard it objected that we cannot suppose God would permit the dead to return merely to frighten the living, and that it is showing Him little reverence to imagine He would suffer them to come on such trifling errands, or demean themselves in so undignified a fashion. But God permits men of all degrees of wickedness, and of every kind of absurdity, to exist, and to harass and disturb the earth, whilst they expose themselves to its obloquy or its ridicule."
Author: Catherine Crowe
7. "Existence was not only absurd, it was plain hard work"
Author: Charles Bukowski
8. "Vanderbilt sent me a series of picture postcards showing Hitler making a speech. The face was obscenely comic – a bad imitation of me, with its absurd moustache, unruly, stringy hair and disgusting, thin, little mouth. I could not take Hitler seriously. Each postcard showed a different posture of him: one with his hands claw-like haranguing the crowds, another with one arm up and the other down, like a cricketer about to bowl, and another with hands clenched in front of him as though lifting an imaginary dumb-bell. The salute with the hand thrown back over the shoulder, the palm upwards, made me want to put a tray of dirty dishes on it. ‘This is a nut!' I thought. But when Einstein and Thomas Mann were forced to leave Germany, this face of Hitler was no longer comic but sinister."
Author: Charles Chaplin
9. "You only play Pistol Annies when you're pissed, usually at me. I know your fake laugh from your real one. You have a great laugh, by the way. I know which shirts are your favorites, because they're the first ones you wear after you've done your laundry. You lick your bottom lip when you're trying to concentrate on your textbook reading. You cry during those commercials with the absurd animals when you think no one is looking. No, I don't know you at all."
Author: Chelsea M. Cameron
10. "Indeed, an astoundingly small proportion of arguments ‘for free speech' and ‘against censorship' or ‘banning' are, in fact, about free speech, censorship or banning. It is depressing to have to point out, yet again, that there is a distinction between having the legal right to say something & having the moral right not to be held accountable for what you say. Being asked to apologise for saying something unconscionable is not the same as being stripped of the legal right to say it. It's really not very f-cking complicated. Cry "free speech" in such contexts, you are demanding the right to speak any bilge you wish without apology or fear of comeback. You are demanding not legal rights but an end to debate about and criticism of what you say. When did bigotry get so needy? This assertive & idiotic failure to understand that juridical permissibility backed up by the state is not the horizon of politics or morality is absurdly resilient."
Author: China Miéville
11. "Forks are absurd, he scoffed. They insult your food. They make it think you're killing it twice."
Author: Clare B. Dunkle
12. "Our system is the height of absurdity, since we treat the culprit both as a child, so as to have the right to punish him, and as an adult, in order to deny him consolation."
Author: Claude Levi Strauss
13. "The reductio ad absurdum of M.D.'s view, I argued, was that science devises ever bloodier means of war until humanity's powers of destruction overcome our powers of creation and our civilization drives itself to extinction. M.D. embraced my objection with mordant glee. 'Precisely. Our will to power, our science, and those v. faculties that elevated us from apes, to saves, to modern man, are the same faculties that'll snuff out Homo Sapiens before this century is out! You'll probably live to see it happen, you fortunate son. What a symphonic crescendo that'll be, eh?"
Author: David Mitchell
14. "The best mannered people make the most absurd lovers."
Author: Denis Diderot
15. "How impossible, how utterly absurd it would be for the disciples--these disciples, such men as these!--to try and become the light of the world! No, they are already the light, and the call has made them so."
Author: Dietrich Bonhoeffer
16. "There are no arguments. Can anyone who has reached the limit bother with arguments, causes, effects, moral considerations, and so forth? Of course not. For such a person there are only unmotivated motives for living. On the heights of despair, the passion for the absurd is the only thing that can still throw a demonic light on chaos. When all the current reasons—moral, esthetic, religious, social, and so on—no longer guide one's life, how can one sustain life without succumbing to nothingness? Only by a connection with the absurd, by love of absolute uselessness, loving something which does not have substance but which simulates an illusion of life. I live because the mountains do not laugh and the worms do not sing."
Author: Emil Cioran
17. "That there should be a reality hidden behind appearances is, after all, quite possible; that language might render such a thing would be an absurd hope."
Author: Emil Cioran
18. "O critica „negativa" se realizeaza stralucitor pe luciditati marunte. Lucrul acesta îl stia pâna si Titu Maiorescu: cita cazul omului de bun-simt care s-a revoltat ca poetul compara ochii iubitei cu doua stele, caci este absurd sa gasesti o asemanare între ochii mari, negri si stelele mici, argintii."
Author: Eugène Ionesco
19. "The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd - The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world's existence. All these half-tones of the soul's consciousness create in us a painful landscape, an eternal sunset of what we are."
Author: Fernando Pessoa
20. "But... that's absurd!' he cried, flushing. 'Your poem is in praise of Jesus, not in blame of Him- as you meant it to be."
Author: Fyodor Dostoyevsky
21. "´Sí, a veces la idea más absurda, la idea más fantástica en apariencia, se apodera de nosotros con tal fuerza que acabamos por creerla realizable´"
Author: Fyodor Dostoyevsky
22. "The absurdity of it, she thought, this quest for the love of a man who was her equal. She loathed herself for it. She thought of her life (and herself) as a missed opportunity. Somewhere, back there, she had missed something. What was it? When was it? The worse horror beneath: that she hadn't missed anything, that her life was merely the sum of her choices and that her choices had led her to this: another truncated encounter; the carcinogenic belief in the idea of a Great Love; clammy sex; loneliness in the small hours."
Author: Glen Duncan
23. "Are you an evolutionist? I'm an absurdist, ma'am. But let's suppose evolution is true; what about the monkeys today? Why can't we see them evolving? Are they still evolving?"
Author: Harrison Wheeler
24. "If you find life absurd, shouldn't you find death precisely meaningful?"
Author: Harry Mulisch
25. "Literature can very well describe the absurd, but it should never become absurd itself"
Author: Isaac Bashevis Singer
26. "The word ‘slavery' and ‘right' are contradictory, they cancel each other out. Whether as between one man and another, or between one man and a whole people, it would always be absurd to say: "I hereby make a covenant with you which is wholly at your expense and wholly to my advantage; I will respect it so long as I please and you shall respect it as long as I wish."
Author: Jean Jacques Rousseau
27. "Treating your audience like thieves is absurd. Anyone who chooses to listen to our music becomes a collaborator."
Author: Jeff Tweedy
28. "Poor human reason, when it trusts in itself, substitutes the strangest absurdities for the highest divine concepts."
Author: John Chrysostom
29. "What an absurd thing it is to pass over all the valuable parts of a man, and fix our attention on his infirmities."
Author: Joseph Addison
30. "Autonomy was shopped to us. We looked at the price and thought it was absurdly high."
Author: Larry Ellison
31. "For many Americans, Osama bin Laden is the paradigmatic Muslim, an absurd conviction for anyone who has lived with Muslims."
Author: Miroslav Volf
32. "Every absurdity has a champion to defend it."
Author: Oliver Goldsmith
33. "Yesterday evening Mrs. Arundel insisted on my going to the window, and looking at the glorious sky, as she called it.  Of course I had to look at it.  She is one of those absurdly pretty Philistines to whom one can deny nothing.  And what was it?  It was simply a very second-rate Turner, a Turner of a bad period"
Author: Oscar Wilde
34. "All I try to do is as earnestly and as acutely as I can, conceive a character and try to portray this character just honestly. If the humor is within the absurdity and the awfulness of situations, then let it be seen that way."
Author: Patrick Warburton
35. "It then becomes necessary to stop short and make a choice: Either/Or. Either one drifts with their absurd system of ideas, believing that this is the human community. Or one dissents totally from their system of ideas and stands as a lonely human being. (But luckily one notices that the others are in the same crisis and making the same choices.)"
Author: Paul Goodman
36. "The history of thought may be summed up in these words: it is absurd by what it seeks and great by what it finds."
Author: Paul Valéry
37. "A culpa em alguém como Bucky pode parecer absurda, porém é, de fato, inevitável. Uma pessoa como ele está condenada. Jamais irá corresponder ao ideal que carrega dentro de si. Nunca sabe onde termina sua responsabilidade. Jamais aceita seus limites porque, sobrecarregado com uma severa bondade natural que não lhe permite resignar-se ao sofrimento dos outros, nunca admitirá , sem se sentir culpado, que possa estar sujeito a alguma limitação"
Author: Philip Roth
38. "It's not entirely absurd to think that somewhere in the past of mankind someone, for the first time, did in his mind the equivalent of putting an adjective to a noun, and saw, not only a relationship, but this special relationship between two things of different kinds....In sum, all the seemingly complicated kinds of modification in English are just ways of thinking and seeing how things go with each other or reflect each other. Modifiers in our language are not aids to understanding relationships; they are the ways to understand relationships. A mistake in this matter either comes from or causes a clouded mind. Usually it's both."
Author: Richard Mitchell
39. "We need to make some dramatic, concrete moves to escape the materialism that seeps into our minds via diabolically clever and incessant advertising. We have been brainwashed to believe that bigger houses, more prosperous businesses, and more sophisticated gadgets are the way to joy and fulfillment. As a result, we are caught in an absurd, materialistic spiral. The more we make, the more we think we need in order to live decently and respectably. Somehow we have to break this cycle because it makes us sin against our needy brothers and sisters and, therefore, against our Lord. And it also destroys us. Sharing with others is the way to real joy."
Author: Ronald J. Sider
40. "Heisenberg and Bohr and Einstein strike me as being like gifted retriever dogs. Off they go, not just for an afternoon, but for ten years; they come back exhausted and triumphant and drop at your feet... a vole. It's a remarkable thing in its way, a vole—intricate, beautiful really, marvellous. But does it... Does it help? Does it move the matter on?When you ask a question that you'd actually like to know the answer to—what was there before the Big Bang, for instance, or what lies beyond the expanding universe, why does life have this inbuilt absurdity, this non sequitur of death—they say that your question can't be answered, because the terms in which you've put it are logically unsound. What you must do, you see, is ask vole questions. Vole is—as we have agreed—the answer; so it follows that your questions must therefore all be vole-related."
Author: Sebastian Faulks
41. "It was an absurd theory that by cutting taxes you would increase government revenues, because the growth of the economy would create an overflow of taxes that would fall into the government coffers."
Author: Sidney Blumenthal
42. "Whatever the misery, he could not regain contentment with a world which, once doubted, became absurd."
Author: Sinclair Lewis
43. "In chess, as a purely intellectual game, where randomness is excluded, - for someone to play against himself is absurd ...It is as paradoxical, as attempting to jump over his own shadow."
Author: Stefan Zweig
44. "Una absurda palabra antigua acudió a su mente. Burlado, pensó. He sido burlado."
Author: Stephen King
45. "When I did a therapist education in USA 1984, one of the course leaders – who had given personal and spiritual guidance to thousands of seekers of truth from all over the world, and who I consider to be one of the best spiritual therapists in the world – said that I was going to get enlightened, that I would "disappear into the silence". I did not really understand what he meant then, and it was totally absurd for me when other course participants congratulated me afterwards. The thought that I was going to be enlightened was totally absurd for me. For me enlightenment was something that happened to special and chosen persons like Osho, Buddha, Jesus, Lao-Tzu and Krishnamurti. I did not feel either special or chosen. I did not feel worthy of being enlightened."
Author: Swami Dhyan Giten
46. "Small islands, not capable of protecting themselves, are the proper objects for kingdoms to take under their care; but there is something absurd, in supposing a continent to be perpetually governed by an island."
Author: Thomas Paine
47. "In this world that God (or Mother Nature) created, it is always hazard and novelty-hazard and novelty-which assert themselves, thereby rendering notions of fixity absurd. Incongruously enough, however, when we allow ourselves to fully accept uncertainty, to embrace and cultivate it even, then we actually can begin to feel within ourselves the presence of an Absolute. The person who cannot welcome ambiguity cannot welcome God."
Author: Tom Robbins
48. "To fear an inner life, she thought, was the greatest foolishness. It was like fearing a breath of air. Why did people find it harder to admit to a universe within than without? Why trust, for a moment, one's own absurd measurement of either?"
Author: Valerie Martin
49. "I observe to the letter all laws that make sense but combat those that are obsolete or absurd."
Author: Wilhelm Reich
50. "PM está excesivamente organizada y se basa en gran medida en una ineficiente burocracia absurda."
Author: Will Self

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I've been fucked up the ass by Fate. What do you think you can do to me with your little, fucking penis?"
Author: B.G. Harlen

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