Top Bagel Quotes

Browse top 27 famous quotes and sayings about Bagel by most favorite authors.

Favorite Bagel Quotes

1. "I served seven years as the chair of the Princeton economics department where I had responsibility for major policy decisions, such as whether to serve bagels or doughnuts at the department coffee hour."
Author: Ben Bernanke
2. "Daddy, how come in Kansas City the bagels taste like just round bread?"
Author: Calvin Trillin
3. "If I were to be honest, I'm probably fifty percent bagel. Okay, fine, sixty percent."
Author: Christy Hall
4. "A gluten-free diet still allows you access to almost every fruit and vegetable, a variety of grains and legumes, your pick of dairy products, fresh meats and fish and a whole slew of special gluten-free delights to satisfy your pretzel-bagel-muffin-doughnut craving."
Author: Daphne Oz
5. "THE BOUNTYIn her kitchen, she saw many things she would like to eat. On the counter, there was a bunch of new bananas, yellow as a Van Gogh chair, and two apples, pristine. The cabinet was open and she saw a box of crackers, a new box of cereal, a tube of curved chips. She felt overwhelmed, seeing all of the food there, that it was all hers. And there was more in the refrigerator! There were juices, half a melon, a dozen bagels, salmon, a steak, yogurt in a dozen colors. It would take her a week to eat all of this food. She does not deserve this, she thought. It really isn't fair, she thought. You're correct, God said, and then struck dead 65,000 Malaysians."
Author: Dave Eggers
6. "She yanked open the door of the bagel shop and gratefully charged inside. Her mind reeled.  Too many voices, too many feelings, too much.  Lauren felt her stomach churning and clutched the door handle.  She focused on the handle.  That was the way out.  The three steps to carry her back out the door were a marathon.  When the door closed, she sank to her knees."
Author: Debora Geary
7. "I actually put peanut butter on my bagel. I really like peanut butter and I like to ruin the bagel. You know what's even crazier that I do sometimes? I do cinnamon raisin bagels with peanut butter. It is really, really out there."
Author: Evan Peters
8. "They'd just left when Zsadist came in at a dead run. "Shit, shit, shit…"What's doing, my brother?""I'm teaching and I'm late."Zsadist grabbed a sleeve of bagels, a turkey leg out of the refridge and a quart of ice cream from the freezer. "Shit.""That's your breakfast?""Shut up. It's almost a turkey sandwich."
Author: J.R. Ward
9. "That was close,"he said, helping himself to coffee.Yeah, you almost opened the door to Morelli."I wasn't talking about Morelli. I was talking about us."That too," I said.Ranger sliced a bagel and looked for the toaster.It's broken,"I told him.He truned the boiler on and slid the bagel into the oven.That's surprisingly domestic for a man of mystery," I said to him.He looked at me over the rim of his coffee mug. "I like things hot."
Author: Janet Evanovich
10. "I don't need a steak knife to cut my meat. That's why karate chops were created. I'm like a butter knife, only slightly less deadly. But I'm great with bagels—and disobedient old people."
Author: Jarod Kintz
11. "Eating a plain bagel with no cream cheese is like eating the inner tube of a bicycle tire, and I'd rather ride my roller skates to work."
Author: Jarod Kintz
12. "Your everyday supermarket now carries roughly 40,000 items - twice as many as a decade ago. There are so many products, so many brands and sub-species of those brands, that no consumer is safe from the bombardment of choice overload.A huge variety of product offering doesn't aid consumers. It is insanity. From the vast array of athletic shoes to bagels to portable CD players to bottled water, there quickly becomes a point at which mega-choices, like mega-information, do not serve the consumer; they abuse him."
Author: Jeff Davidson
13. "I definitely invented the everything bagel. There's no doubt. It's undeniable truth. It's one of those things that's 100% true, 50% of the time."
Author: Joe Bastianich
14. "From a Twitter post on why food is better than people: 'Bagels don't talk about you behind your back.' ... Since WHEN???"
Author: John Alejandro King
15. "I tried being anorexic for four hours, and then I was like, I need some bagels."
Author: Kat Dennings
16. "Bagel in the morning is the ultimate breakfast for me; they're just good."
Author: Lee DeWyze
17. "Well, schmear my bagel, if it isn't Mara Dyer."
Author: Michelle Hodkin
18. "Romanians have a saying, 'Not every dog has a bagel on its tail.' It means that not all streets are paved with gold. When I began my career, I just wanted to do cartwheels."
Author: Nadia Comaneci
19. "No, you're not like me. You're better. A better person, a better goddamn everything. Now, eat your breakfast. And if you open your mouth to say you aren't everything I know you are, I'll stuff that bagel in it. Plain. Without cream cheese.Healthy food--the ultimate threat."
Author: Rob Thurman
20. "Robert Hughes, Time magazines's art critic, told him on the phone that after he saw the planes flying over SoHo he had walked around in shock. On his way home he had stopped by a bakery and found the shelves cleaned out. Not a loaf remained, not a bagel, and the old baker standing amid the emptiness spread his arms and said, 'Should happen every day."
Author: Salman Rushdie
21. "In New York, I like it when you can get bagels at 3 in the morning."
Author: Shepard Smith
22. "Just out of curiosity, can an immortal choke to death on a bagel? (Francesca)"
Author: Sherrilyn Kenyon
23. "I'll show Luke I can fit into the city. I'll show him I can be a true New Yorker. I'll go the gym, and then I'll eat a bagel, and I'll ... shoot someone, maybe? Or maybe just the gym will be enough."
Author: Sophie Kinsella
24. "A kind of emptiness existed in the center of my bagel; really it was just the hole that's in the middle of all bagels; 'i need to go read my blog to find out what my politics are"
Author: Tao Lin
25. "Runners are bouncing up and down at the curb waiting for lights to change. Cops are in coffee shops dealing with bagel deficiencies."
Author: Thomas Pynchon
26. "See, I thought gay sex would be all different and weird, but it was just like having sex with a woman, except way hotter. I guess you can't believe stuff you see on the Internet, because you know, the hot gay sex I had last night was totally awesome, and nobody like, put their entire hand in my butt." Doug stood and walked over to Stephen, who was shoving a bagel into a Ziploc bag. "Anyway, hold on, here he is," Doug said into the phone, and then held it out towards him. "It's your mom."
Author: Valerie Z. Lewis
27. "The problem is, at a certain point you can't stop thinking even if you want to. I swear, sometimes you just wish you could go back into the dark like a primitive person. But you cant, that's the problem with evolution. Once you have a little bit of knowledge, more of it just keeps coming at you like birds around a bagel. Sometimes when I learn things, I wish I hadn't learned them."
Author: Victor Lodato

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White people love rock climbing almost more than they love camping. This isbecause the activity affords them the opportunity to be outside, to use a carabiner for something other than their keys, and to purchase a whole new set of expensive activity-specific clothing and accessories."
Author: Christian Lander

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