Top Balls Quotes

Browse top 626 famous quotes and sayings about Balls by most favorite authors.

Favorite Balls Quotes

1. "Not that I knew just what an incubus actually looked like, but judging by the darkness that was sliding up the back of his neck, it wasn't overly human. Hysterical visions of people running for the exits pursued by a massive cock and balls filled my mind, and I let out a gasp of laughter despite myself."
Author: Allison Pang
2. "Let the grass die. I let almost all of my indoor plants die from neglect while I was writing the book. There are all kinds of ways to live. You can take your choice. You can keep a tidy house, and when St. Peter asks you what you did with your life, you can say, 'I kept a tidy house, I made my own cheese balls."
Author: Annie Dillard
3. "December is celebrated quite heartily here in the United States. Aggresively, one might say. Every conceivable space is corseted with strands of twinkle lights, buildings are smothered beneath greenery, and a mass mania for erecting oversized, inflatable, waving "snowmen" in front of homes erupts amid the populace. It's quite a hysteria- and the evergreen trees are not just a myth, Vasile. People really do purchase them, in abundance. They are for sale everywhere. Imagine paying for the privilege of dragging a filthy piece of forest into your living area for the purpose of bedecking it with glass balls and staring at it.Why a tree? If one needed to display glass balls-and I highly discorage it-why not just a case of some sort? A rack?"
Author: Beth Fantaskey
4. "Bits and pieces flung into the universe, sticking in the sky like cotton balls on a jet black velcro surface."
Author: Bradley Chicho
5. "Ostriches like shiny things like coins and eyeballs."
Author: Charise Mericle Harper
6. "Pop culture. Nobody does bullshit better than us. Right? China took over manufacturing. And the Middle East has us on fossil fuels. That's just geography and politics. We're a nation of whacko immigrants. Scavengers and con men. We crossed the ocean on faith, stole some land and stone-cold made up a whole country out of nothing but balls and bullshit. Superhero comics got invented by crazy genius Jews who showed up and revamped the refugee experience into a Man of Steel sent from Krypton with a secret identity."
Author: Damon Suede
7. "He had a punch like a bag full of cue balls."
Author: Dennis Lehane
8. "I don't mean like balls-in-your-face or gifts of pornography and butt plugs romantic, just cute, over-the-pants, PG-13 movie stuff."
Author: Frances Winkler
9. "To his inner ear, the cardinal speaks. He says, I saw you, Crumb, when you were at Elvetham: scratching your balls in the dawn and wondering at the violence of the king's whims. If he wants a new wife, fix him one. I didn't, and I am dead."
Author: Hilary Mantel
10. "I agreed. By this time the drink was beginning to cut the acid and my hallucinations were down to a tolerable level. The room service waiter had a vaguely reptilian cast to his features, but I was no longer seeing huge pterodactyls lumbering around the corridors in pools of fresh blood. The only problem now was a gigantic neon sign outside the window, blocking our view of the mountains -- millions of colored balls running around a very complicated track, strange symbols & filigree, giving off a loud hum...."Look outside," I said."Why?""There's a big ... machine in the sky, ... some kind of electric snake ... coming straight at us.""Shoot it," said my attorney."Not yet," I said. "I want to study its habits."
Author: Hunter S. Thompson
11. "Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends, and integrity. And you're keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls...are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered."
Author: James Patterson
12. "I should like balls infinitely better,' she replied, 'if they were carried on in a different manner; but there is something insufferably tedious in the usual process of such a meeting. It would surely be much more rational if conversation instead of dancing were made the order of they day.''Much more rational, my dear Caroline, I dare say, but it would not be near so much like a ball."
Author: Jane Austen
13. "I'm keeping a list of Mr. Wrongs going for you. This one might not make it to the weekend's auction.""Stop," said another woman."I'm just kidding.""I still vote we strip him down." This was a third woman.Wait. Three women? Had he died and gone to orgy heaven? Awake now, Ty took stock. He wasn't dead. And he had no idea who the fuck Mr. Wrong was, but he was very much "going to make it." He was stuffed in the back of a car, a small car, his bad leg cramping like a son-of-a-bitch. His head was pillowed on...he shifted to try to figure it out, and pain lanced straight through his eyeballs. He licked dry lips and tried to focus. "I'm okay.""Good," one of them repeated with humor. "He's fine, he's okay. He's also bleeding like a stuck pig. Men are ridiculous."-Ty and the Chocoholics ladies"
Author: Jill Shalvis
14. "Oh ye! Who have your eye-balls vexed and tired,Feast them upon the wideness of the sea"
Author: John Keats
15. "It's not that the Democrats are playing checkers and the Republicans are playing chess. It's that the Republicans are playing chess and the Democrats are in the nurse's office because once again they glued their balls to their thighs."
Author: Jon Stewart
16. "On this moment Huey's balls grew threesizes. By Huey's estimates, this made theminhumanly enormous. Ginormous even. In Spanish,the word for testicles is "juevos". This is also theword for eggs. On this moment, Huey's juevos werehard boiled."
Author: Jonathan Culver
17. "Lord, stamp eternity on my eyeballs."
Author: Jonathan Edwards
18. "…Carlotta hovered over us as we devoured her meatballs, running her floury fingers over the backs of our chairs, then gently touching our heads, the napes of our necks. We pretended not to notice, ashamed in front of one another and ourselves to show that we drank in her nurturance as eagerly as her meat sauce."
Author: Jonathan Lethem
19. "Oh, heads are going to roll for this. I'm going to set up a special lane and use their skulls for bowling balls."
Author: Julie Kagawa
20. "Celibate? He lived and breathed sex. Considered sex the eighth wonder of the world. Suffering blue balls was for teenagers. Not grown men."
Author: Kate Angell
21. "(From the Manga) Whoever solves this puzzle shall be granted one wish ... like the dragon balls ..."
Author: Kazuki Takahashi
22. "Now, I was well aware that certain sports required certain modes of dress for protection, but I failed to see how wearing a sleeveless blouse on the course qualified as a safety hazard. God forbid the sight of my bare shoulders should send male golfers into a tizzy, knocking balls everywhere."
Author: Kelley Armstrong
23. "If you ever carry forth a plot that threatens my golden queen, you will die choking on your own balls and you'll do it while staring in my eyes"
Author: Kristen Ashley
24. "I adore the way fan fiction writers engage with and critique source texts, by manipulating them and breaking their rules. Some of it is straight-up homage, but a lot of [fan fiction] is really aggressive towards the source text. One tends to think of it as written by total fanboys and fangirls as a kind of worshipful act, but a lot of times you'll read these stories and it'll be like ‘What if Star Trek had an openly gay character on the bridge?' And of course the point is that they don't, and they wouldn't, because they don't have the balls, or they are beholden to their advertisers, or whatever. There's a powerful critique, almost punk-like anger, being expressed there—which I find fascinating and interesting and cool."
Author: Lev Grossman
25. "Stop it!" Chas shrieked, stomping her foot. "I will not have my boyfriend fighting if it's not over me! Stop it!""Let's say it's over you!" Tom grunted as he and Coalhouse wrestled with one another. "If he thinks he's gonna finally get a girl, he might grow balls enough to beat me!"
Author: Lia Habel
26. "Bayleigh got up from the table and walked slowly toward Cade, the shirt she'd stolen from him barely buttoned and enticing him with every step. His pupils dilated with desire and she watched his cock swell beneath his jeans. She moved as if she were going to straddle his lap, but at the last second, she moved her knee so it was pressed directly against his balls. His indrawn breath was enough to know that she was using the right amount of pressure."Don't you ever threaten me with my brothers", she whispered in his ears. "I get enough of that from them and I won't take it from you too, no matter how much control you think our sleeping together gives you. I'm old enough to make my own decisions and take the consequences of my actions. I control my life. No one else."She nipped at his ear and felt satisfaction at his indrawn breath."
Author: Liliana Hart
27. "He delivered his hand to my ass, so I delivered my knee to his balls." -- Nina Wrigley"
Author: Lynn Weingarten
28. "The one, who doesn't break your heart, will break your balls."
Author: M.F. Moonzajer
29. "I peer through the spectral, polluted, nicotine-sodden windows of my sock at these old lollopers in their kiddie gear. Go home, I say. Go home, lie down, and eat lots of potatoes. I had three handjobs yesterday. None was easy. Sometimes you really have to buckle down to it, as you do with all forms of exercise. It's simply a question of willpower. Anyone who's got the balls to stand there and tell me that a handjob isn't exercise just doesn't know what he's talking about. I almost had a heart-attack during number three. I take all kinds of other exercise too. I walk up and down the stairs. I climb into cabs and restaurant booths. I hike to the Butcher's Arms and the London Apprentice. I cough a lot. I throw up pretty frequently, which really takes it out of you. I sneeze, and hit the tub and the can. I get in and out of bed, often several times a day."
Author: Martin Amis
30. "I threw up again that night, half-afraid that my eyeballs would explode. But it was, by far, more important that I get rid of dinner. Of course, by then, throwing up was the only way I knew how to deal with fear. That paradox would begin to run my life: to know that what you are doing is hurting you, maybe killing you, and to be afraid of that fact--but to cling to the idea that this will save you, it will, in the end, make things okay."
Author: Marya Hornbacher
31. "Truly, can you imagine anything more boring than fashion? Professional sports, perhaps. Grown men swatting little balls, while the rest of the world pays money to applaud."
Author: Michael Crichton
32. "I watch every day when we hit and take ground balls and the way we go about our business. If I saw any lackadaisical approach, that would concern me."
Author: Mike Quade
33. "Gleason used to rack balls for me when he was a kid in Brooklyn and in Long Island."
Author: Minnesota Fats
34. "Illium seems far too pretty to be dangerous." Dmitri's male beauty, by contrast, was a darker, edgier thing."No one ever expects him to take out a blade and slice off their balls," he said with lethal amusement in his tone as he drove them toward the GeorgeWashington Bridge. "He does it with such grace, too."
Author: Nalini Singh
35. "Remembering your mistakes more acutely than any minor success. This was the worst. The things that kept you up at night. Tip a waiter that was too small. The words that didn't fit the moment. Words that didn't come till to late. You could kill yourself in increments, punishing your spirit day after day-regret. Guilt. Not the guilt of the little girl who woke in the night embarrassed God was mad at her because she had ticked balls under her shirt, pretending to have breasts. "I even felt sexy." That was sweet, and pure, no crime at all. But the crime of obsessive replay-get rid of it, get rid of it. Who could ever have known that hardest punishments would be the ones you gave yourself?"
Author: Naomi Shihab Nye
36. "Fat Charlie was thirsty and his head hurt and his mouth tasted evil and his eyes were too tight in his head and all his teeth twinged and his stomach burned and his back was aching in a way that started around his knees and went up to his forehead and his brains had been removed and replaced with cotton balls and needles and pins which was why it hurt to try and think, and his eyes were not just too tight in his head but they must have rolled out in the night and been reattached with roofing nails; and now he noticed that anything louder than the gentle Brownian motion of air molecules drifting softly past each other was above his pain threshold. Also, he wished he were dead."
Author: Neil Gaiman
37. "Your balls are touching mine" Jace said between clenched teeth. "What's a little sac contact between friends?"
Author: Olivia Cunning
38. "He is looking down on the two crystal balls that the old man's foul, strong hands have rolled across to him. In one he sees Margaret, not in her raincoat and her nodding plumes, but as she is transfigured in the light of eternity. Long he looks there; then drops a glance to the other, just long enough to see that in its depths Kitty and I walk in bright dresses through our glowing gardens. We had suffered no transfiguration, for we are as we are, and there is nothing more to us. The whole truth about us lies in our material seeming. He sighs a deep sigh of delight and puts out his hand to the ball where Margaret shines. His sleeve catches the other one and sends it down to crash in a thousand pieces on the floor. The old man's smile continues to be lewd and benevolent; he is still not more interested in me than in the bare-armed woman. Chris is wholly inclosed in his intentness on his chosen crystal. No one weeps for this shattering of our world."
Author: Rebecca West
39. "So . . . what is this fire river called?""The Phlegethon," [Annabeth] said. "You should concentrate on going down.""The Phlegethon?" [Percy] shinnied along the ledge. They'd made it roughly a third of the way down the cliff—still high enough up to die if they fell. "Sounds like a marathon for hawking spitballs.""Please don't make me laugh," she said."Just trying to keep things light."
Author: Rick Riordan
40. "What? It's a fair sacrifice. If you've got to be with one chick for the rest of your life, then you should at least get to go out with a bang. Or two. Or three." Anna raised a perfectly arched brow. "Really? Would you want some jackass to do that with our daughter?" "Fuck no. I'll chop the little bastard's balls off if he tries that kind of shit on my girl," he scowled."
Author: S.C. Stephens
41. "You have the skills," Chaol said, "but some of your moves are still undisciplined.""That's never stopped me from killing before," she spat.Chaol chuckled at her agitation and pointed his sword at the rack, allowing her to get to her feet. "Pick another—something different. Make it interesting, too. Something that will make me sweat, please.""You'll be sweating when I skin you alive and squish your eyeballs beneath my feet," she muttered, picking up the rapier."That's the spirit."She practically threw the rapier into place, and drew the hunting knives without hesitation.My dear old friends.A wicked smile spread across her face."
Author: Sarah J. Maas
42. "I'm not a wife, or a mother, or a pillar of the ton," she waved her unharmed arm as though the life she was describing was just beyond the room. "I'm invisible. So, why not stop being such a craven wallflower and start trying all the things that I've always dreamed of doing? Why not go to taverns adn drink scotch and fence? I confess, those things have been much more interesting than all the loathsome teas and balls and needlepoint with which I have traditionally occupied my time." She met his gaze again. "Does this make sense?"He nodded seriously. "It does. You're trying to find Callie."
Author: Sarah MacLean
43. "Elizabeth: "Your balls, Mr. Darcy?"Darcy: "They belong to you, Miss Bennett."
Author: Seth Grahame Smith
44. "Can you even cry, anyway? With your eyes and all." Josh asks, fingers tapping a rhythm on the cushion behind Caid's right shoulder.Caid swats his arm away. Says, "How is someone paying you to teach children? Of course I can fucking cry; it's not my tear ducts that are broken.""I teach history, not the anatomy of eyeballs, shithead.""How old are you?" Caid scoffs, feeling frustrated and exposed. He hates talking about his blindness. Hates it almost more than actually being blind."
Author: Seventhswan
45. "The girl and Doctor Reefy began their courtship on a summer afternoon. He was forty-five then and already he had begun the practice of filling his pockets with the scraps of paper that became hard balls and were thrown away. The habit had been formed as he sat in his buggy behind the jaded white horse and went slowly along country roads. On the papers were written thoughts, ends of thoughts, beginnings of thoughts.One by one the mind of Doctor Reefy had made the thoughts. Out of many of them he formed a truth that arose gigantic in his mind. The truth clouded the world. It became terrible and then faded away and the little thoughts began again.("Paper Pills")"
Author: Sherwood Anderson
46. "They missed every time, and with that wary judgment that comes with experience, I watched the dirty snowballs coming at me, behind and in front, and, sick with wonder, kept walking slowly, determinedly, ready to parry a good hit before it struck. But none struck, and with a tolerant smile that was a superior lie, I walked on."
Author: Sylvia Plath
47. "Because it's all relative. You're pinned down in some filthy hellhole of a paddy, getting your ass delivered to kingdom come, but then for a few seconds everything goes quiet and you look up and see the sun and a few puffy white clouds, and the immense serenity flashes against your eyeballs - the whole world gets rearranged - and even though you're pinned down by a war you've never felt more at peace."
Author: Tim O'Brien
48. "Everybody feel pain except a woman who kicks a man in the balls."
Author: Toba Beta
49. "The sand was smooth. The damp morning fog had hardened its top layer and the heat of the day had set it so that with every footstep the surface cracked, the crunch almost audible. The heels and balls of their shoes made a path of shallow divots, but it was far easier to walk on than the usual loose and gritty beach. In minutes, the wind worked to sweep their footprints clean and offer a flat, clear expanse all the way to the ocean where the sand became wet and sparkled invitingly with seawater."
Author: Victoria Kahler
50. "Well, I said, needing to lighten the mood for him, "next time Kai tries to, um, bust your balls, you can give it right back to him, because he's got a girlfriend now, too."
Author: Wendy Higgins

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I confidently walked up to the counter, and his friends moved to the side to let me through. I handed him the note. "Happy Birthday," I said. Then I smiled and walked out of the store. I did my crossing-the street trick again, lurking in the shadows and watching. I could see him turn the note over in his hand, open it and read, then turn it over again. He passed it to his friends, who passed it between them. Then I watched him make a shrugging gesture with his hands. And then they were all laughing again. My mortification was total and overpowering. I was suddenly having a very difficult time standing. I had experienced a perfect note of utter and true clarity. He was straight."
Author: Augusten Burroughs

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