Top Church Pews Quotes

Browse top 14 famous quotes and sayings about Church Pews by most favorite authors.

Favorite Church Pews Quotes

1. "If you're a preacher's kid, you see the church differently."
Author: Andy Stanley
2. "On Saturday night, I would see men lusting after half-naked girls dancing at the carnival, and on Sunday morning when I was playing organ for tent-show evangelists at the other end of the carnival lot, I would see these same men sitting in the pews with their wives and children, asking God to forgive them and purge them of carnal desires. And the next Saturday they'd be back at the carnival or some other place of indulgence. I knew then that the Christian church thrives on hypocrisy, and that man's carnal nature will out no matter how much it is purged or scoured by any white-light religion."
Author: Anton Szandor LaVey
3. "One day we came home from some errands to find a grocery sack of [zucchini] hanging on our mailbox. The perpetrator, of course, was nowhere in sight ... Garrison Keillor says July is the only time of year when country people lock our cars in the church parking lot, so people won't put squash on the front seat. I used to think that was a joke ... It's a relaxed atmosphere in our little town, plus our neighbors keep an eye out and will, if asked, tell us the make and model of every vehicle that ever enters the lane to our farm. So the family was a bit surprised when I started double-checking the security of doors and gates any time we all were about to leave the premises."Do I have to explain the obvious?" I asked impatiently. "Somebody might break in and put zucchini in our house."
Author: Barbara Kingsolver
4. "They kicked me out of the church when I'm a little girl because they said I'm singing like a dog. They didn't want me to sing there anymore."
Author: Concha Buika
5. "Bonhoeffer's three conclusions—that the church must question the state, help the state's victims, and work against the state, if necessary—were too much for almost everyone. But for him they were inescapable. In time, he would do all three."
Author: Eric Metaxas
6. "The Church being what she is cannot have the instincts of a gentleman."
Author: George Everett Macdonald
7. "As I say, it never ceases to amaze me how gullible some of our Church members are..."Admonitions for the Priesthood of God", Ensign, Jan 1973"
Author: Harold B. Lee
8. "Ritual murder is referred to in court files which are located in Rome. There are pictures in it which show that in 23 cases, the Church itself has dealt with the question."
Author: Julius Streicher
9. "Nothing in the church makes people in the church more angry than grace. It's ironic: we stumble into a party we weren't invited to and find the uninvited standing at the door making sure no other uninviteds get in. Then a strange phenomenon occurs: as soon as we are included in the party because of Jesus' irresponsible love, we decide to make grace "more responsible" by becoming self-appointed Kingdom Monitors, guarding the kingdom of God, keeping the riffraff out (which, as I understand it, are who the kingdom of God is supposed to include)."
Author: Mike Yaconelli
10. "Let us not forget: we are a pilgrim church, subject to misunderstanding, to persecution, but a church that walks serene, because it bears the force of love."
Author: Oscar A. Romero
11. "Why at the beginning of things is there always light? Dorrigo Evans' earliest memories were of sun flooding a church hall in which he sat with his mother and grandmother. A wooden church hall. Blinding light and him toddling back and forth, in and out of its transcendent welcome, into the arms of women. Women who loved him. Like entering the sea and returning to the beach. Over and over."
Author: Richard Flanagan
12. "Let the systematic theologian spell it out. Let the artists throw out thoughts and slants, maybe even slants no one else has thought of. They should give another view of something familiar to help us learn more about it. They should deal with love, life, good, evil, God, the world and faith. Many of the biblical writers were poets more than they were theologians. Poets and prophets ranted and raved, and storytellers wrote great yarns that all had different slants on God and life and faith. Perhaps the poet's absence from the Church for many centuries has left it deprived of much insight."
Author: Steve Stockman
13. "A Lutheran church in Nebraska is typically a place where any mad passion for Christ is politely concealed. Men and women recite the various creeds in hypnotic monotone; the hymns, pumped from wheezy organ pipes, are sung with no lilt or musicality. The members of the choirs not only don't dance, they don't sway. That's not to say no one is ever smacked hard with God's love or filled up to the eyeballs with the Holy Spirit, but when you are, you keep it to yourself." (48)"
Author: Timothy Schaffert
14. "Arthur Schieble died in August 1955, after the adoption was finalized. Just after Christmas that year, Joanne and Abdulfattah were married in St. Philip the Apostle Catholic Church in Green Bay. He got his PhD in international politics the next year, and then they had another child, a girl named Mona. After she and Jandali divorced in 1962, Joanne embarked on a dreamy and peripatetic life that her daughter, who grew up to become the acclaimed novelist Mona Simpson, would capture in her book Anywhere but Here. Because Steve's adoption had been closed, it would be twenty years before they would all find each other."
Author: Walter Isaacson

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She's evil. Evil, evil, evil. I want to see her naked."
Author: Christopher Moore

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