Top Common Sense Funny Quotes

Browse top 21 famous quotes and sayings about Common Sense Funny by most favorite authors.

Favorite Common Sense Funny Quotes

1. "He could sense Kshar underneath, and he knew he'd be able to sense him in whatever body. Unchanged, genuinely him."
Author: Aleksandr Voinov
2. "...the student of prehistoric man...cannot reject [the Castenedolo skull] as false without doing injury to his sense of truth, and he cannot accept it as fact without shattering his accepted beliefs."
Author: Arthur Keith
3. "I took my time exploring. I savored the first minutes in a new home. Carlos would always go straight to unpacking boxes, looking for the sheets and coffeepot and swearing that we were going to get better organized, while I stepped stealthily over the bare floors, peeking around corners and into alluring doors, which generally turned out to be the broom closet. But there was that thrilling sense that, like a new lover, the place held attributes I had yet to discover. My favorite book as a child was _The Secret Garden_. It's embarrassing to think I'd merrily relocated again and again, accompanying Carlos to the ends of the earth, because of the lure of a possible garret or secret closet. But it might be true."
Author: Barbara Kingsolver
4. "Quarrelling means trying to show that the other man is in the wrong. (And) There is no sense in trying to do that unless you and he had some sort of agreement as to what Righ and Wrong are..."
Author: C.S. Lewis
5. "People are no longer primarily in opposition, nor can they be said to be interacting, rather they are participating in this pool of common meaning which is capable of constant development and change."
Author: David Bohm
6. "Bob Hope, like Mark Twain, had a sense of humor that was uniquely American, and like Twain, we'll likely not see another like him."
Author: Dick Van Dyke
7. "He was just trying to tease me - I knew that later - but he said he'd have to leave because it wasn't fair to have anyone in the room who was going to make fun of what he had to say. He had a good sense of humor, really."
Author: Fay Wray
8. "The rapprochement of peoples is only possible when differences of culture and outlook are respected and appreciated rather than feared and condemned, when the common bond of human dignity is recognized as the essential bond for a peaceful world."
Author: J. William Fulbright
9. "We Greeks are a moody people. Suicide makes sense to us. Putting up Christmas lights after your own daughter does it--that makes no sense. What my yia yia could never understand about America was why everyone pretended to be happy all the time."-Mrs. Karafilis"
Author: Jeffrey Eugenides
10. "Once again, he backed off from a challenge by hiding behind a twisted sense of honor. "Let's change the subject, shall we?" "Sure. I got a Brazilian wax today." He choked on the piece of bread in his mouth."
Author: Jennifer Probst
11. "One's relationship with money is lifelong, it colors one's sense of identity, it shapes one's attitude to other people, it connects and splits generations; money is the arena in which greed and generosity are played out, in which wisdom is exercised and folly committed. Freedom, desire, power, status, work, possession: these huge ideas that rule life are enacted, almost always, in and around money."
Author: John Armstrong
12. "How could I have thought that I needed to cure myself in order to fit into the 'real' world? I didn't need curing, and the world didn't, either; the only thing that did need curing was my understanding of my place in it. Without that understanding - without a sense of belonging to the real world - it was impossible to thrive in an imagined one."
Author: Jonathan Franzen
13. "The Magi in my life have always surprised me. They have often been people I initially felt I had nothing in common with. Sometimes I didn't even like them. But they came bearing gifts. Of wisdom, or acceptance. One or two came to give me a kick in the pants...and some left as suddenly as they came. They returned to their respective homelands or continued on their own journeys. I miss some of them... But we all have to find our way toward what ever miracle awaits us. And to perform miracles, when it is in our power to do so. Maybe the most important question is: how do I serve the Magi for others? How generously do I give my gifts - and not just to the obvious recipients in my life? How far out of my way do go to recognize and pay homage to miracles? Not very far some days. But on good days, just far enough."
Author: Juliette Fay
14. "It's funny to be a critic."
Author: Leslie Fiedler
15. "Self-Realization Fellowship seemed like training. It was the training ground for finding a sense of peace in myself. Because that's my job. It's no one else's."
Author: Mariel Hemingway
16. "Yet you could feel a vibration in the air, a sense of hastening. It had started with the moon, inaccessible poem that it was. Now men had walked upon it, rubber treads on a pearl of the gods. Perhaps it was an awareness of time passing, the last summer of the decade. Sometimes I just wanted to raise my hands and stop. But stop what? Maybe just growing up."
Author: Patti Smith
17. "I cannot be knownBetter than you know me Your eyes in which we sleepWe togetherHave made for my man's gleamA better fate than for the common nights Your eyes in which I travelHave given to signs along the roadsA meaning alien to the earthIn your eyes who reveal to usOur endless solitude Are no longer what they thought themselves to be You cannot be knownBetter than I know you."
Author: Paul Éluard
18. "It is funny what a year can do."
Author: Victor Cruz
19. "All extremes are dangerous. It is best to keep in the middle of the road, in the common ruts, however muddy."
Author: Virginia Woolf
20. "When I come into the theatre I get a sense of security. I love an audience. I love people, and I act because I like trying to give pleasure to people."
Author: Vivien Leigh
21. "After the Egyptian and Indian, the Greek and Roman, the Teuton and Mongolian, the Negro is a sort of seventh son, born with a veil, and gifted with second-sight in this American world,—a world which yields him no true self-consciousness, but only lets him see himself through the revelation of the other world. It is a peculiar sensation, this double-consciousness, this sense of always looking at one's self through the eyes of others, of measuring one by the tape of a world that looks on in amused contempt and pity. One ever feels his two-ness,—an American, a Negro... two thoughts, two unreconciled strivings; two warring ideals in one dark body, whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder.The history of the American Negro is the history of this strife, — this longing to attain self-conscious manhood, to merge his double self into a better and truer self."
Author: W.E.B. Du Bois

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Today's Quote

You can tell all that about me from your measuring tape?''Well, I use the metric system, It's the only way to get really exact numbers."
Author: Catherynne M. Valente

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