Top Dieting Funny Quotes

Browse top 27 famous quotes and sayings about Dieting Funny by most favorite authors.

Favorite Dieting Funny Quotes

1. "I actually went to see 'Rushmore,' and I came late, and I missed myself. It was great, that scene. I caught that scene the other day on TV, funny enough, the first scene that you see with Jason Schwartzman and myself, where we talk about his grades. That's a brilliant scene, and I have to say, we play it brilliantly."
Author: Brian Cox
2. "It's a funny thing in my job: you remain perpetually lonely in a world where loneliness is the rarest commodity."
Author: Brian W. Aldiss
3. "I've got to get on myself to be sharp, funny and loose."
Author: David Spade
4. "And when you're on your own there is that terrifying possibility that you may be the only person on the planet who thinks it's funny - and you have no way of finding out."
Author: Denis Norden
5. "The nefarious frost that slithers around my spine brings forth concern that Donovan is regressing and needs to be put back on the funny farm, yet my heart longs to surrender in harmony with his madness. Without him, I will never be complete."
Author: Diane Rinella
6. "Now,I'm no scientist,but I know what endorphins are. They're tiny little magical elves that swim through your blood stream and tell funny jokes to each other. When they reach your brain,you hear what they're saying and that boosts your health and happiness. "Knock Knock... Who's There?.. Little endorphin... Little endorphin who?... Little Endorphin Annie." And then the endorphins laugh and then you laugh. See? Its Science."
Author: Ellen DeGeneres
7. "You know, fame is a funny thing, man, especially, you know, actors, musicians, rappers, rock singers, it's kind of a lifestyle and it's easy to get caught up in it - you go to bars, you go to clubs, everyone's doing a certain thing... It's tough."
Author: Eminem
8. "That was a funny thing about friends, Marylin thought. You could know a person practically your whole life and she could still surprise you."
Author: Frances O'Roark Dowell
9. "I can't not find humor in elements of most parts of life, but at the same time nothing ever seems perpetually funny to me."
Author: Greg Kinnear
10. "I think what is important for things to be funny is if you the listener, or the reader, get a chance to supply the humor of it yourself."
Author: Ian Frazier
11. "Commitment is a funny thing, you know? It's almost like getting a tatoo. You think and you think and you think and you think before you get one. And once you get one, it's stick to you hard and deep."
Author: Ika Natassa
12. "I was so scared it was all going to be gone by the time I got there. Ninth grade, tenth grade - can't this thing go any faster?In the magazine, there were funny people with funny names like John Sex, who had wild white hair and a snake!-and didn't that just open up a kaleidoscope of new possibilities?And how long the years are-endless! And the minutae of your daily life! So tedious, when there are BIG THINGS happening a thousand miles away. And when you go to bed at night, it's hard to believe those people, those fabulous, daunting people, are out there right now!So we wait, and we endure, and someday we will be there, and we will make it."
Author: James St. James
13. "During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one."
Author: Jerry Stiller
14. "Augustus Waters was the Mayor of the Secret City of Cancervania, and he is not replaceable", Isaac began."Other people will be able to tell you funny stories about Gus, because he was a funny guy, but let me tell you a serious one: A day after I got my eye cut out, Gus showed up at the hospital. I was blind and heartbroken and dind't want to do anything and Gus burst into my room and shouted, 'I have wonderful news!' And I was like, 'I don't really want to hear wonderful news right now' and Gus said, 'This is wonderful news you want to hear' and I asked him, 'Fine, what is it?' and he said, 'You're going to live a good and long life filled with great and terrible moments that you cannot even imagine yet!'"Isaac couldn't go on, or maybe that was all he had written."
Author: John Green
15. "Henry drew a shaky breath. "Do me a favor, Meg.""Anything," I whispered."Don't fall for Quinn O'Neill. If you're going to do this thing with him…go to this dance, don't fall for him.""Never," I said. "I promise.""Because I'm all filled up on sad right now." He sniffed again and I could tell he was more in control. "And you can't ask me to sit by and watch you get all caught up in this guy. I can't handle that—thinking he swept you off your feet because he bathed in body spray and dressed up." His voice sounded rough. "I know you think I'm being funny right now, but I'm completely serious. Don't make me watch that happen.""You know my heart," I said. "It's yours."
Author: Laura Anderson Kurk
16. "No," he agreed. "You're not. She never caused me this agony."What could I say to that? The way he was looking at me was making my head feel funny. Was making me feel funny and not just in that oh God I just almost died way.Christophe leaned in. His mouth was a mere centimetres from me. "She never made me think I would die of heart failure. She never, never made me fear for her this way."
Author: Lili St. Crow
17. "A female feline named KattaIs getting fatta and fattaBut she's pretty and purryAnd funny and furrySo what does an ounce or two matta?"
Author: Lilian Jackson Braun
18. "I'm smart and I can be really funny and interesting and I can go toe-to-toe with anybody in a conversation."
Author: Megan Fox
19. "I allow a lot of room for improvisation and funny stuff. I always feel planned."
Author: Michael Bay
20. "It was a survival thing: he didn't answer back, didn't say anything about job security for prison guards, debate the nature of repentance, rehabilitation, or rates of recidivism. He didn't say anything funny or clever, and, to be on the safe side, when he was talking to a prison official, whenever possible, he didn't say anything at all. Speak when you're spoken to. Do your own time. Get out. Go home. ... Rebuild a life."
Author: Neil Gaiman
21. "The brilliant escape, the funny line to cap it, despite the lack of timing. And the girl was still dead. The last act had not materialised. The world, and himself, remained so far from what they should be: so imperfect."
Author: Paul Cornell
22. "Be funny whenever possible, even if some people don't get it."
Author: Rob Lowe
23. "Here's the thing - in this damned century, you'll meet a lot of people who do a lot of things. What's funny is the fact that the most desirable attributes of these people are nothing but developed and cultured thoughts. And these things come naturally to people who shine bright. The other guys just try to ape these thoughts, in an embarrassing attempt to recreate some of that magic. Sadly,- what looks beautiful as a natural quotient can be extremely funny and disgusting when replicated manually. Stop replicating feelings; else you'll turn into one of those duplicate personalities. They're wannabes. You don't have to become one!"
Author: Shomprakash Sinha Roy
24. "It's funny how you call me a celebrity. Oh man."
Author: Steven Hill
25. "If I ever do anything, it actually might be some fantasy elf thing or even some cute, funny thing. Just to do something a little bit out of the ordinary. I've done my superhero gig."
Author: Todd McFarlane
26. "I'm obsessive about the kind of melodrama of getting through the days and trying to make them good and funny and a happy experience. But my feeling towards the fans is that they delivered me from darkness."
Author: Tom Baker
27. "After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore."
Author: Yakov Smirnoff

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Today's Quote

On the day Princess Diana died, a group of students had gathered before a lecture, talking about what they had heard on the radio that morning, repeating "paparazzi" over and over, all sounding knowing and cocksure, until, in a lull, Okoli Okafor quietly asked, "But who exactly are the paparazzi? Are they motorcyclists?" and instantly earned himself the nickname Okoli Paparazzi"
Author: Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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