Top Erection Quotes

Browse top 102 famous quotes and sayings about Erection by most favorite authors.

Favorite Erection Quotes

1. "I have to admit, for a second it was sort of turning me on, because I kept imagining Georgia in a very positive light. She was donning designer swimwear with fringe or whatever and she was lying on her stomach with the bikini-top straps untied. I was lathering her up with sun block and my hands were getting into all the cracks and crevices. The image got me pretty excited, and before I knew it, I had an erection. At first I thought it would go away, but it kept getting worse, like harder in that painful way. So that's when I did something a little weird – I started barking at it. Like a Great Dane or a pit bull or whatever. I literally barked at my erection! And it worked, I'm not kidding."
Author: Adam Rapp
2. "The building is a ginormous 175-story office building that juts into the sky like a glass and steel erection."
Author: Andrew Shaffer
3. "I now have an erection that is probably tall enough to ride some of the scarier rides at Great America without a parent."
Author: Audrey Niffenegger
4. "Even when she'd fantasized, what she'd come up with hadn't ever matched this reality. She'd never envisioned a sexy, borderline grouchy guy with a glint in his eye and an erection this tempting."
Author: Cari Quinn
5. "The Tower of Babel"...The undersigned citizens, being artists, painters, sculptors, architects, and others devoted to and desirous preserving the amenities of Paris, wish to protest, in the name of our national good taste, against such an erection in the very heart of our city, as the monstrous and useless Eiffel Tower, already christened... " The Tower of Babel"...How much longer is the City of Paris to be a play-ground for these barbarous and sordid imaginations which disfigure and dishonor her? For the Eiffel Tower, which even commercially minded America rejected, is a public dishonor to our city. All our historic buildings, our monuments of rare and appealing beauty, are dwarfed and humiliated by this monstrous apotheosis of the factory chimney whose odious shadow will lie over the city...--Plea to the Exposition Director in opposition to the Eiffel Tower, signed by artists and writers and published in Le Temps, 1887"
Author: Carol McCleary
6. "Next, I'm holding a bag of clothes, being herded toward an open door filled with sunlight. My briefs are still looped around my ankles, so I'm waddling, my erection swinging in front of me like a blind man's cane, and the talent wrangler has the nerve to say, 'Thank you for coming..."
Author: Chuck Palahniuk
7. "My head is in another dimension. My feet are talking to their soles. My nose is detecting a hint of sweaty, overpumped poon. There's a spider corpse perpetually hanging on the wall next to my pillow that I don't have any desire to correct. My breath smells like Kuwait. My arms are doing the Crazy Granny Dance, and my hips are just plain jealous. I was born across the pond from a heretic's womb, and fathered by an equally atrocious Sinatra-obsessed lion tamer. If these are all the symptoms of a world-famous record producer whose lover has just ditched him for a career in straight porn, then becometh I the sum of all homoerotic fears. Now fetch me more scotch and someone to make use of my erection, preferably with their mouth."---Wolfgang Stephanopolis"
Author: Dave Matthes
8. "It took Pueblo a few seconds to take in his surroundings. The first thing he realised was that he felt bruised all over; the second was that his clothes were waterlogged, even more than before, from the quicksand; and the third, was that he had landed on his front and was lying on a large, uncomfortable stone.No, wait… In his disoriented state, he shifted his weight. The stone didn't move. He was lying on his own fucking erection."
Author: Dianna Hardy
9. "Honorius Hatchard had been old Miss Hatchard's great-uncle; though she would undoubtedly have reversed the phrase, and put forward, as her only claim to distinction, the fact that she was his great-niece. For Honorius Hatchard, in the early years of the nineteenth century, had enjoyed a modest celebrity. As the marble tablet in the interior of the library informed its infrequent visitors, he had possessed marked literary gifts, written a series of papers called "The Recluse of Eagle Range," enjoyed the acquaintance of Washington Irving and Fitz-Greene Halleck, and been cut off in his flower by a fever contracted in Italy. Such had been the sole link between North Dormer and literature, a link piously commemorated by the erection of the monument where Charity Royall, every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon, sat at her desk under a freckled steel engraving of the deceased author, and wondered if he felt any deader in his grave than she did in his library."
Author: Edith Wharton
10. "But sweetie, nothing says I love you like an erection."
Author: Ethan Day
11. "He had a bleeding cut on his leg and he smelled like shit.Her nose wrinkled. "Step in something?" she asked innocently."That I did not mind." He took a menacing step toward her. "What I did mind was being hit by a cab, then landing on the lap of a naked man. With an erection, Anya. He had an erection."
Author: Gena Showalter
12. "When my face is flushed with blood, it becomes red and obscene. It betrays at the same time, through morbid reflexes, a bloody erection and a demanding thirst for indecency and criminal debauchery."
Author: Georges Bataille
13. "For small erections may be finished by their first architects; grand ones, true ones, ever leave the copestone to posterity. God keep me from ever completing anything. This whole book is but a draught—nay, but the draught of a draught. Oh, Time, Strength, Cash, and Patience!"
Author: Herman Melville
14. "She frowned. Then blurted, "Do you have other females?"As if anyone could measure up to her? "No! Why do you ask?""We haven't layed together and you are a male with obvious... needs. Even now, your body has changed, hardening, growing big."Crap. He'd tried to hide the erection, he really had. "Marissa-""Surely you need to be eased regularly. Your body is phearsom."That didn't sound good. "What?""Potent and powerful. Worthy of entering a female."Butch closed his eye, thinking Mr. Worthy was really rising to the occasion now."
Author: J.R. Ward
15. "He's going to jail. He can't see. He can't hear. He can't take a leak that lasts under fifteen minutes. But he has an erection and all the other problems are small change. Next time around I'm coming back as a man. Priorities are clearly defined. Life is simple."
Author: Janet Evanovich
16. "He kept looking at my crotch, so I looked at his and saw he had an erection. That's more flattering than any oratorical praise."
Author: Jarod Kintz
17. "Can the government grow the economy like a farmer grows an erection, or a male porn star grows a tree?"
Author: Jarod Kintz
18. "The pockmarked and chalk-white sidewalk was like the surface of the moon, and I felt like Neil Armstrong as I walked along in my space boots and white helmet with my visor flipped down. Of course in zero gravity, Neil probably had a more impressive erection than I did at that moment."
Author: Jarod Kintz
19. "North, south, east, west, I need to find a nude erection to point the way."
Author: Jarod Kintz
20. "Books on erections should only come in hardcover. And books on love should be printed on recycled paper."
Author: Jarod Kintz
21. "My erection at noon causes an elongated shadow so black you'd think I was an albino."
Author: Jarod Kintz
22. "My erection is made of iron, and metal detectors make me horny."
Author: Jarod Kintz
23. "If sharks really can smell blood, then I'd imagine they're all salivating over my erection right now."
Author: Jarod Kintz
24. "If my penis gets enough water, could my erection grow long and straight like a pine tree? Come over next Tuesday to find out! Bring a friend, but not a lumberjack."
Author: Jarod Kintz
25. "It's hard to type with gloves on. It's also hard to type with just an erection. It's basically like typing with one finger, and in my case, a pinky."
Author: Jarod Kintz
26. "He pulled his lips away and rested his forehead against hers, trying to keep himself from getting another erection. It took great strength of will, but he did it."
Author: Julianne MacLean
27. "Varian rubbed the back of his head where his lump was growing significantly. "Not that I particularly want to defend Merrick, but those little rocks did happen to hurt. Thank the gods for armor." Merewyn gave him a sweet, sympathetic pout. "Poor baby." She reached up to rub his sore spot, but honestly he'd much rather have her rub something else that was bothering him. The touch of her hand made his entire body break out into chills. Not to mention that the smell of her so close played total havoc with his hormones. He honestly wanted to curl up beside her and start purring like a cat. More than that, he had a vicious need to nibble her body until he was drunk on her scent. And there was a thought that made him glad he was wearing his armor again since it kept his erection hidden from the ones around him. Stepping away from her before he actually did purr, he looked at Merrick. "What other nasty surprises do we have in store for us?"
Author: Kinley MacGregor
28. "Anne had no sooner uttered the phrase, "home o'dreams," than it captivated her fancy and she immediately began the erection of one of her own. It was, of course, tenanted by an ideal master, dark, proud, and melancholy; but oddly enough, Gilbert Blythe persisted in hanging about too, helping her arrange pictures, lay out gardens, and accomplish sundry other tasks which a proud and melancholy hero evidently considered beneath his dignity. Anne tried to banish Gilbert's image from her castle in Spain but, somehow, he went on being there, so Anne, being in a hurry, gave up the attempt and pursued her aerial architecture with such success that her "home o'dreams" was built and furnished before Diana spoke again."
Author: L.M. Montgomery
29. "She'd read somewhere that normal, healthy men got up to twenty erections a day. Um...yep, Ares was definitely healthy."
Author: Larissa Ione
30. "Accidental sex. He made it sound like I fell down, and there just happened to be an erection in the way."
Author: Laurell K. Hamilton
31. "He whirled her against the refrigerator, his hands hard on her waist. Startled, she dropped her purse and keys to the floor and looked up at his set face and narrowed savage eyes. "Don't ever do that to me again," he said with clenched teeth.She didn't have to ask what he meant. Those moments when Pavón's pistol had been trained directly at her head had been long and terrifying."I stayed in the—" she began, but he cut her off with a kiss that was wild and hungry and deep. He lifted her onto her toes and pressed in hard against her, grinding his erection into the softness of her mound.She yielded immediately to that outraged male aggression, wrapping her arms around him and transforming it into sheer lust."
Author: Linda Howard
32. "I scowled defensively. "My conversations don't usually include the subject of erections.""Too bad," he said. "All the best conversations do."
Author: Lisa Kleypas
33. "He's fiddling around in his pocket...nothing to worry about...all the young ones fiddle around in their pockets...a pistol? an erection?"
Author: Louis Ferdinand Céline
34. "Oh sir, you've done more for us with one erection than what has been achieved in hundreds of years. Bless you, sir. Bless you."
Author: Mark Alders
35. "Erections, as we all know, come to the teenager on a plate."
Author: Martin Amis
36. "(As brain cells die from oxygen starvation, euphoria sets in, and one last, grand erection.)"
Author: Mary Roach
37. "If working-hours were natural, then employed men would only get erections between 5 p.m. and 9 a.m. … during the week."
Author: Mokokoma Mokhonoana
38. "I can't believe it. He is sporting a bona fide erection in the middle of class. All because of me.In history you learn about entire kingdoms crumbling into chaos because of a woman—or, in some cases, multiple women. I smile at Professor Delacroix, putting an extra bit of swing into my hips as I sashay out the door. I'm beginning to see just how easy it is to bring a man to his knees with a few flashes of bare skin, and the whispered promise of hot, sweaty sex."
Author: Nenia Campbell
39. "Just your everyday grouping of civilized gentlemen, sitting in a round robin to discuss the events of the day with quivering erections."
Author: Patrick DeWitt
40. "But man is still today, at the age of twenty-five, at the mercy of an erection, physically too, from time to time, it's the common lot, even I was not immune, if that can be called an erection. It did not escape her naturally, women smell a rigid phallus ten miles away and wonder, How on earth did he spot me from there?"
Author: Samuel Beckett
41. "On the other side of St John's house is a fake egg timer who can't maintain an erection. He shares the property with a glossy beef burger called Tom, who has been painted by a seven year old magistrate in order to be entered for this year's Miss East Lancashire competition. Next door to them is a Dundee cake with a lisp."
Author: St John Morris
42. "Negotation is a point of interection of common interest."
Author: Sukant Ratnakar
43. "Erections don't equal personal growth, Trey"
Author: Suzanne Wright
44. "I knew guys got erections.I was perfectly prepared to deal with it. When the right guy and the right erection came along."
Author: Tara Altebrando
45. "He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I'm a girl so I didn't get one you sicko."
Author: Tara Gilesbie
46. "In fact, gone are the days of having sex at all. I have resorted to jerking off alone in the bathroom after my wife's asleep. It's a sad, lonely existence when you have to take your cell phone into the shitter so you don't wake your wife when you pull up the YouPorn app and crank one out. The worst part is the SpongeBob SquarePants shower curtain in the bathroom. Do you know how difficult it is to keep an erection while SpongeBob is staring at you with his big, googly eyes and you keep hearing the song "Jellyfishin', Jellyfishin', Jellyfishin" in your head?"
Author: Tara Sivec
47. "Listen to me. When a man wakes, he wakes wanting. He wakes hard and rude and aching with need." He shifted, pressing his massive erection against her hip. "Do you feel that?" She gasped. "Yes." "It wants in you," he said. "In . . . in me." "Yes. In you. Hard, deep, fast, and completely. Now don't wake me at this hour again unless you've found the perfect retort to that."
Author: Tessa Dare
48. "A Cathedral Façade at MidnightAlong the sculptures of the western wallI watched the moonlight creeping:It moved as if it hardly moved at allInch by inch thinly peepingRound on the pious figures of freestone, broughtAnd poised there when the Universe was wroughtTo serve its centre, Earth, in mankind's thought.The lunar look skimmed scantly toe, breast, arm,Then edged on slowly, slightly,To shoulder, hand, face; till each austere formWas blanched its whole length brightlyOf prophet, king, queen, cardinal in state,That dead men's tools had striven to simulate;And the stiff images stood irradiate.A frail moan from the martyred saints there setMid others of the erectionAgainst the breeze, seemed sighings of regretAt the ancient faith's rejectionUnder the sure, unhasting, steady stressOf Reason's movement, making meaningless."
Author: Thomas Hardy
49. "Reason is intelligence taking exercise. Imagination is intelligence with an erection."
Author: Victor Hugo
50. "My advice to a budding literary critic would be as follows. Learn to distinguish banality. Remember that mediocrity thrives on "ideas." Beware of the modish message. Ask yourself if the symbol you have detected is not your ownfootprint. Ignore allegories. By all means place the "how" above the "what" but do not let it be confused with the "so what." Rely on the sudden erection of your small dorsal hairs. Do not drag in Freud at this point. All the rest depends on personal talent."
Author: Vladimir Nabokov

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He thinks it's his day, and when you think it's your day, it usually is."
Author: Andre Agassi

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