Top Funny Bourbon Quotes

Browse top 21 famous quotes and sayings about Funny Bourbon by most favorite authors.

Favorite Funny Bourbon Quotes

1. "I kicked, shouted an obscene word, got another faceful of goo for my troubles, and did the only thing left available to me. I started to laugh. This was a stupid way to die, all right. But also a god damned funny one."
Author: Adam Troy Castro
2. "What an astonishing thing a book is. It's a flat object made from a tree with flexible parts on which are imprinted lots of funny dark squiggles. But one glance at it and you're inside the mind of another person, maybe somebody dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, an author is speaking clearly and silently inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people who never knew each other, citizens of distant epochs. Books break the shackles of time. A book is proof that humans are capable of working magic."[Cosmos, Part 11: The Persistence of Memory (1980)]"
Author: Carl Sagan
3. "I know the path by heart, by heart- a funny expression, so true. My heart knows right where to go."
Author: Cynthia Hand
4. "It is not funny that anything else should fall down; only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh? Because it is a gravely religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified."
Author: G.K. Chesterton
5. "I'm always more motivated by the pain of a funny character than by what makes him funny."
Author: Jason Alexander
6. "Kids cannot follow stories. They don't know what the hell is going on in a cartoon. They like to see funny visual things happening."
Author: John Kricfalusi
7. "- Dude, it's Jocelyn, I (Jordan) say looking over my shoulder nervously [...]- This isn't Jocelyn, B.J says sighing. It's Jordan. Dude, try to play a better trick than that. You sound nothing like her. Plus your number came up on my caller ID.PS: maybe I'm just in a very good mood, but I keep laughing while reading this book, there are plenty of scenes that make me smile, and this is one of them.. it's just hilarious how silly and funny these characters are ;))"
Author: Lauren Barnholdt
8. "A female feline named KattaIs getting fatta and fattaBut she's pretty and purryAnd funny and furrySo what does an ounce or two matta?"
Author: Lilian Jackson Braun
9. "I came to regard my body in a new light. For the first time I apprehended the little mounds on my chest as teats for the suckling of young, and their physical resemblance to udders on cows or the swinging distensions on lactating hounds was suddenly unavoidable. Funny how even women forget what breasts are for.The cleft between my legs transformed as well. It lost a certain outrageousness, an obscenity, or achieved an obscenity of a different sort. The flaps seemed to open not to a narrow, snug dead end, but to something yawning. The passageway itself became a route to somewhere else, a real place, and not merely to a darkness in my mind. The twist of flesh in front took on a devious aspect, its inclusion overtly ulterior, a tempter, a sweetener for doing the species' heavy lifting, like the lollipops I once got at the dentist."
Author: Lionel Shriver
10. "You know, I'm just a very boring, not very funny person in person. I don't feel pressured to be otherwise."
Author: Lorrie Moore
11. "Plus, I love comic writing. Nothing satisfies me more than finding a funny way to phrase something."
Author: Michael Pollan
12. "It was funny the way memory obliged the heart. His happy recollections were always afloat in his soupy subconscious where so many of his darker memories had sunk to the underbelly of his past and been as good as lost forever. But without conscious instruction, memory had edited and enlarged the finest moments of his life and stored them like masterpieces in the private gallery of his personal history."
Author: Nanci Kincaid
13. "Hm funny you think you truly know me all tell you this only my trust of friends know who I relay am"
Author: Pikmin100xx
14. "A politician is a politician whether he's wearing a suit or a funny hat."
Author: Reza Aslan
15. "So, " Nathan said, attention focused on Adrian, "now that Vasilisa's graduated, what are you going to do with yourself? You aren't going to keep slumming with high school students, are you? There's no point in you being there anymore. " "I don't know, " said Adrian lazily. "I kind of like hanging out with them. They think I'm funnier than I really am. " "Unsurprising, " his father replied. "You aren't funny at all. It's time you do something productive. If you aren't going to go back to college, you should at least start sitting in on some of the family business meetings. Tatiana spoils you, but you could learn a lot from Rufus. " "True, " said Adrian deadpan."I'd really like to know how he keeps his two mistresses a secret from his wife. " "Adrian!" snapped Daniella, a flush spilling over her pale cheeks"
Author: Richelle Mead
16. "Do you need help with anything?" he asked with a wicked arched brow. "Maybe with cookies for Santa."Scowling because no one was here but us, I said, "You're a bit late for that. Santa already came."He hadn't moved, but I knew better than to think he would. Flynn was a pro at filling the bubble air space that was meant to be private and personal. "And were you a good girl?" he asked.Awkwardly folding my arms over my chest, I said, "Not sure, I haven't checked. But you needn't look. We all know you are all bad."Laughing, he said, "Yeah, well, there are other things worth unwrapping."Grinding my teeth, I asked, "What, you didn't get your Ho, Ho, Ho, last night?"Tossing back another full belly laugh, he said, "You know you're kind of funny when you want to be."
Author: Shannon Dermott
17. "I don't know if I'm embarrassed because I think it's a funny show, but I could imagine there being a snootiness about it, but I do find 'The Big Bang Theory' very funny. I think that's a good show. I think it's fun, I like the actors; I think they're all doing a great job."
Author: Stephen Merchant
18. "We all have our funny little ways. Except me, obviously."
Author: Terry Pratchett
19. "The real funny thing is, whether the demons exist or not at all in your life, it's nothing to do whether you believe or not to one, none nor both of them."
Author: Toba Beta
20. "There is some humour in 'Family Values.' I don't want everyone to think it's not going to make them laugh. But there are quite a lot of poems there that aren't funny at all."
Author: Wendy Cope
21. "We went hand in hand across four lines of avenues. At the corner she was to go right, and I left."I'd like so much to come to your place today and let the blinds down. Today-right this minute" said O, and shyly looked up at me with her round crystal-blue eyes.she's a funny one. But what could I say? She was with me only yesterday, and she knows as well as I do that our next Sex Day is the day after tomorrow. It's just more of her thought getting ahead of itself, like a spark that flies too early in the ignition, which can do some harm at times.Saying goodbye, I kissed her twice-no, I'll tell the truth-three times on those wonderful blue eyes of hers that not the least little cloud ever troubled."
Author: Yevgeny Zamyatin

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Cuando llovía con fuerza, Max sentía que el tiempo se detenía. Era como una tregua en la cual uno podía dejar de hacer cualquier cosa que le ocupase en aquel momento y sencillamente acercarse a contemplar el espectáculo de aquella infinita cortina de lágrimas del cielo desde una ventana, durante horas. Dejó de nuevo el libro sobre la mesita y apagó la luz. Lentamente, envuelto en el sonido hipnótico de la lluvia, se rindió al sueño."
Author: Carlos Ruiz Zafón

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