Funny Eavesdropping Quotes

1. "They say to think within the box, but it's funny how those in the box never go anywhere, where those outside it, get to see the world."
Author: Anthony Liccione

2. "Invention:I always wanted to invent something that would move around & make funny noises & would change the world as we know it & I forgot all about that until we had kids & now I see I came pretty close."
Author: Brian Andreas

3. "A lot of reality shows tend to harp on the negative. The person isn't pretty enough or can't sing well enough or maybe isn't even funny enough."
Author: Bruce Nash

4. "If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now."
Author: Cassandra Clare

5. "A funny person is funny only for so long, but a wit can sit down and go on being spellbinding forever. One is not meant to laugh. One stays quiet and marvels. Spontaneously witty talk is without question the most fascinating entertainment there is."
Author: Diana Vreeland

6. "I'm no use to anybody,' I say. 'I'm a cérébrale, can't you see that?' Thinking how funny a book would be, called 'Just a Cérébrale or You Can't Stop Me From Dreaming'. Only, of course, to be accepted as authentic, to carry any conviction, it would have to be written by a man. What a pity, what a pity!"
Author: Jean Rhys

7. "We're living in a funny world kid, a peculiar civilization. The police are playing crooks in it, and the crooks are doing police duty. The politicians are preachers, and the preachers are politicians. The tax collectors collect for themselves. The Bad People want us to have more dough, and the good people are fighting to keep it from us. It's not good for us, know what I mean? If we had all we wanted to eat, we'd eat too much. We'd have inflation in the toilet paper industry. That's the way I understand it. That's about the size of some of the arguments I've heard."
Author: Jim Thompson

8. "Boston is actually the capital of the world. You didn't know that? We breed smart-ass, quippy, funny people. Not that I'm one of them. I just sorta sneaked in under the radar."
Author: John Krasinski

9. "Razor appeared on his shoulder with a buzzing laugh. "Stupid goblins," he crowed, bouncing up and down, making Kierran sigh. "Funny, stupid goblins think master is funny elf. Ha!" He buzzed once more and sat down, grinning like a psychotic piranha."
Author: Julie Kagawa

10. "By all means, stay," Anne said. "Have a seat. We'll take care of you next.""Yeah, see, I think someone else is going to be on trial next." Baring my teeth at her in a grin I pulled out my file folder. "I've got some interesting reading here. And I even brought copies for everyone so you don't have to share."A distinguished-looking South American man on the end shook his head. "What is this? Another farce?""No, but bonus points for using a funny word. You really want to read what I have here. Anne, you'll be especially interested, since you have a starring role.""Enough. Rhia—"Reth quickly flicked his wrist at her; her mouth kept moving, but no sound came out. It was one of the most satisfying things I'd ever seen. Sure, that trick had sucked when he used it on me, but I wholly approved of it now."
Author: Kiersten White

11. "As a comedian, I don't know if they're laughing because it's funny or if they're laughing at me because I'm not funny. And I'm thinking, 'Who cares? They're laughing.' If you go on stage, and they're laughing at you full-on for 60 minutes? You know, whatever puts them in the seats."
Author: Larry The Cable Guy

12. "I need to be cheered up a lot. I think funny people are people who need to be cheered up."
Author: Lynda Barry

13. "It's funny how the night that changes your life forever starts out like all the others."
Author: Marisha Pessl

14. "[I]t is funny because economists are not real scientists, and because logicians think more clearly, but mathematicians are best."
Author: Mark Haddon

15. "If you could cross a lion and a monkey, that's what I'd be, because monkeys are funny and lions are strong."
Author: Marlon Wayans

16. "My dad loved to laugh. He was very funny and very silly."
Author: Mike Myers

17. "The simile has to match the tone of its surroundings and has to be like a little joke. Writing a simile that isn't funny on some level is quite hard."
Author: Ned Beauman

18. "I hate stand-up comics; I think funny is something you are, not something you desperately try to be in front of a roomful of obnoxious people."
Author: Peter Cameron

19. "Well, once again we are invaded. And, humiliatingly, by a lifeform which is absurd. My colleague Tim Powers once said that Martians could invade us simply by putting on funny hats, and we'd never notice. It's a sort of low-budget invasion. I guess we're at the point where we can be amused by the idea of Earth being invaded. (And this is when they really zap you."
Author: Philip K. Dick

20. "I guess when you turn off the main road, you have to be prepared to see some funny houses."
Author: Stephen King

21. "It's so funny when you're actually directing because things start popping that you don't expect to pop, and something that you think is going to pop, maybe doesn't quite have the impetus that you thought it might."
Author: Stephen Moyer

22. "It's funny how, in this journey of life, even though we may begin at different times and places, our paths cross with others so that we may share our love, compassion, observations, and hope. This is a design of God that I appreciate and cherish."
Author: Steve Maraboli

23. "I was not funny growing up."
Author: Tim Meadows

24. "Life is strange and funny with many winding roads ahead...but the roads of greed and  hypocrisy will lead to a person's downfall each and every time."
Author: Timothy Pina

Funny Eavesdropping Quotes Pictures