Top Funny Ece Quotes

Browse top 33 famous quotes and sayings about Funny Ece by most favorite authors.

Favorite Funny Ece Quotes

1. "At the Theatre: To the Lady Behind MeDear Madam, you have seen this play;I never saw it till today.You know the details of the plot,But, let me tell you, I do not.The author seeks to keep from meThe murderer's identity,And you are not a friend of hisIf you keep shouting who it is.The actors in their funny wayHave several funny things to say,But they do not amuse me moreIf you have said them just before;The merit of the drama lies,I understand, in some surprise;But the surprise must now be smallSince you have just foretold it all.The lady you have brought with youIs, I infer, a half-wit too,But I can understand the pieceWithout assistance from your niece.In short, foul woman, it would suitMe just as well if you were mute;In fact, to make my meaning plain,I trust you will not speak again.And—may I add one human touch?—Don't breathe upon my neck so much."
Author: A.P. Herbert
2. "But it is funny, because I saw Unbreakable recently and it's a strange movie, I didn't mind it, and it's got some interesting things going on."
Author: Alex Winter
3. "It's almost funny, isn't it?""What is?""How some animals are worth more than others?""Well," he handed Konrad a sugar cube from a tin on the shelf. "It isn't just the animal; it's the type of animal.""Color, shape, size? If people pay for an animal based on what it looks like, what does that say about them?""It isn't necessarily what they look like." He frowned. "It's about where they come from.""That's silly," she said."
Author: Amanda Lance
4. "You love SITUATION COMEDIES, whilst holding particular affection for MUSTACHIOED FUNNYMEN. You know, your FOXWORTHIES, your FUNKES, your SWANSONS, but not necessarily your GALLAGHERS PER SE, because you have to draw the fucking line somewhere."
Author: Andrew Hussie
5. "LUBOV. I'm quite sure there wasn't anything at all funny. You oughtn't to go and see plays, you ought to go and look at yourself. What a grey life you lead, what a lot you talk unnecessarily."
Author: Anton Chekhov
6. "You've come to give me a piece of your mind, I repeated, looking at her. "You know that phrase is really beautiful. The mind is the most powerful thing in the body, you know, whatever the mind believes, the body can achieve. So to give someone a piece of it...well, thank you, Elizabeth. Funny how people are always intent on giving it to the people they dislike when it really should be for the ones they love. There's another funny thing. But a piece of your mind...what a gift that would be." I looped the last stalk and formed a chain. "I'll give you a daisy chain in return for a piece of your mind." I slid the bracelet onto her arm.She sat on the grass. Didn't move, didn't say anything, just looked at her daisy chain. Then she smiled and when she spoke her voice was soft. "Has anyone ever been mad at you for more than five minutes."I looked at my watch. "Yes. You, from the o'clock this morning until now."
Author: Cecelia Ahern
7. "It is a funny thing. A man can make a promise to his God, break it five minutes later and never think about it. With an idle shrug of his shoulders, a man can break solemn promises to his mother, wife or sweetheart, and, except for a slight momentary twinge of conscience, he still won't be bothered very much. But if a man ever breaks a promise to himself he disintegrates. His entire personality and character crumble into tiny pieces, and he is never the same man again.I remember very well a sergeant I knew in the army. Before a group of five men he swore off smoking forever. An hour later he sheepishly lit a cigarette and broke his vow to the five of us and to himself. He was never quite the same man again, not to me, and not to himself."
Author: Charles Willeford
8. "I felt empty and sad for years, and for a long, long time, alcohol worked. I'd drink, and all the sadness would go away. Not only did the sadness go away, but I was fantastic. I was beautiful, funny, I had a great figure, and I could do math. But at some point, the booze stopped working. That's when drinking started sucking. Every time I drank, I could feel pieces of me leaving. I continued to drink until there was nothing left. Just emptiness."
Author: Dina Kucera
9. "I'd argue with Warren, but it's a funny thing with people. Even if you argue, when that person isn't around to say their piece, you say it for them. You may not even link with their point, but out of loyalty you make that man's point for him 'cause he ain't there. Years later, in college, surrounded by cynical liberals like myself, I'd say things that I swear came out of Warren's mouth and it helped me understand that old saying that no man is an island. People ask me what my greatest strengths are and I say perspective. The best way to get that is to meet people that are polar opposites; you learn the most from them. There are pieces of you that are inherently yours, but everything else is a collection of the things you've seen and the people you've met. In the end, we're like the Triumph beat: who's next on this RZA track? Step up and drop a verse on my story. That's the illest."
Author: Eddie Huang
10. "You know what's kind of funny? Well, not funny, but ironic, maybe? She's been here nine months now, and it takes nine months to create life. It's like she's been reborn. And the fact that tomorrow you turn eighteen is just another piece of it. It feels like right now is the start of something, like we're at the beginning and not the finish line."Dominic started to walk away but paused after a few steps, his brow furrowed. "Actually, I don't think that's what irony is. Haven would probably correct me again and say I was being symbolic."
Author: J.M. Darhower
11. "MyrtleHow funny your name would beif you could follow it back to wherethe first person thought of saying it,naming himself that, or maybesome other persons thought of itand named that person. It wouldbe like following a river to its source,which would be impossible. Rivers have no source.They just automatically appear at a placewhere they get wider, and soon a realriver comes along, with fish and debris,regal as you please, and someonehas already given it a name: St. Benno(saints are popular for this purpose) or, orsome other name, the name of hislong-lost girlfriend, who comesat long last to impersonate that river,on a stage, her voice clankinglike its bed, her clothing of sandand pasted paper, a piece of real technology,while all along she is thinking, I cando what I want to do. But I want to stay here."
Author: John Ashbery
12. "It's funny, I don't feel any older than I did when I was twenty. But I know I am, because recently some twenty-year-old called me 'sir.' Sometimes the only way you know you are getting older is by the way others treat you."
Author: John Van Epp
13. "I know from the middle distance I give off the look of being prolific, which is a funny compliment to receive."
Author: Joseph Epstein
14. "She was sad and lost and alone in the dark," Cecil said. "She needed somebody to hold her.""And you think she's going to get tired of that?""You did," Cecil said. "You shut me right out.""It was your decision, not mine," Dave said. "You are the dearest thing in life to me. You're bright and funny and gentle and decent and full of life. And I will never get tired of you, and neither will Chrissie. It's not up to her anyway. You're the adult. Tell her the truth -- that it was an act of kindness that got out of hand.""I can't hurt her like that," Cecil said. "It will hurt more the longer you let it go on."
Author: Joseph Hansen
15. "I think you figure out how to be funny by necessity. It's not a natural thing, being funny in the face of tragedy is kind of demented."
Author: Julie Brown
16. "This is beautiful," I said, ignoring the shop window to trace the gleaming stone walls fronting another boutique."You know what's funny?" Jacob asked. He didn't wait for my answer. "You can see beauty in everything, except for yourself."***I swallowed hard. Erik thought my body was beautiful, Karin that it was enviable. At random times, people had noted that my hands were beautiful, or my hair. The Twisted Sisters had called my art beautiful. Mom had the best intentions and always told me before and after my laser surgeries that I would be beautiful. But no one had ever said that I was beautiful, all my parts taken together, not just the bits and pieces."
Author: Justina Chen
17. "I'm not the girl men chose.I'm the girl who's charming and funny and then drives home wondering what she did wrong. I'm the girl who meets someone halfway decent and then fills in the gaps in his character with my own imagination, only to be shocked when he's not the man I thought he was.I'm the girl who hides who she really is for fear I'll fall short."
Author: Liza Palmer
18. "That was the funny thing about my feelings for Ben - in most ways, they had nothing to do with Daniel. My feelings for them seemed like two entirely separate but necessary chambers of my heart."
Author: Martha Southgate
19. "Who's straight? I'm not. I am bent gouged pinched and tugged at, and squeezed into this funny shape. Each life is a game of chess that went to hell on the seventh move, and now the flukey play is cramped and slow, a dream of constraint and cross-purpose, with each move forced, all pieces pinned and skewered and zugzwanged... But here and there we see these figures who appear to run on the true lines, and they are terrible examples. They're rich, usually."
Author: Martin Amis
20. "It was funny the way memory obliged the heart. His happy recollections were always afloat in his soupy subconscious where so many of his darker memories had sunk to the underbelly of his past and been as good as lost forever. But without conscious instruction, memory had edited and enlarged the finest moments of his life and stored them like masterpieces in the private gallery of his personal history."
Author: Nanci Kincaid
21. "She walked over while he poured her a mug and even added the right amount of sugar. It did funny things to her heart that he hadn't forgotten how she drank her coffee. Such a small and ordinary piece of knowledge, but still a piece of her."
Author: Natalie Herzer
22. "Research for fiction is a funny thing: you go looking for one piece of information, and find something altogether different."
Author: Nell Freudenberger
23. "Jen put her hands on her hips and pinned Sally with the famous 'you're going to spit it out or I'm going to rip it out of you' look. "You talked?" Jen asked sarcastically. "Sally," she cleared her throat then continued, "you have a mate. A guaranteed husband. A sure thing. Not to mention he's hot, funny, sweet, and he has a dimple. You talked?" She repeated. This time Jen's voice was skeptical. Before Sally could defend herself, however, her door opened slowly, calculatingly."I know you weren't describing me Jennifer. So who is this male who has caught your eye so descriptively? Please do tell, so that I can rip him to pieces." Decebel's power filled the room and Sally took an involuntary step away from the very angry Alpha."
Author: Quinn Loftis
24. "The training part," I guessed."Yup. You're going to be Dimitri's partner."A moment of funny silence fell, probably not noticeable to anyone except Dimitri and me. Our eyes met."Guarding partner," Dimitri clarified unnecessarily, like maybe he too had been thinking of other kinds of partners."
Author: Richelle Mead
25. "She scanned the room, and her grin broadened when she saw Christian. She then sought me out. Her smile for him had been affectionate; mine was a bit humorous. I smiled back, wondering what she would say to me if she could."What's so funny?" asked Dimitri, looking down at me with amusement."I'm just thinking about what Lissa would say if we still had the bond."In a very bad breach of protocol, he caught hold of my hand and pulled me toward him. "And?" he asked, wrapping me in an embrace."I think she'd ask,'What have we gotten ourselves into?'""What's the answer?" His warmth was all around me, as was his love, and again, I felt completeness. I had that missing piece of my world back. The soul that complemented mine. My match. My equal. Not only that, I had my life back-my own life. I would protect Lissa, I would serve, but I was finally my own person."I don't know," I said, leaning against his chest. "But I think it's going to be good."
Author: Richelle Mead
26. "Appreciation is one of those funny things that you have to just allow it to blend together on its own. Past reveals all as they say. You will indefinitely know when the time comes to leave a crappy relationship. There's just no mistaking it. There comes a time when no more growth can come to a union for many folks. Well then go plant your seeds into your own garden before you come invest your time into another person again. Whatever you need to connect with will come and go as necessary."
Author: Sereda Aleta Dailey
27. "Again, this week as I walked on Broadway, in front of giant photographs of voluptuous supermodels at a Victoria Secret mega-store, who was rebuilding the sidewalks? With sweaty headbands, ripped-up jeans, and dust on their brown faces? Their muscled hands quivered as they worked the jack-hammers and lugged the concrete chunks into dump trucks. Two men from Guanajuato. Undocumented workers. They both shook my hand vigorously, as if they were relieved I wasn't an INS officer.I imagined how much money Victoria Secret was making off these poor bastards. I wondered why passersby didn't see what was in front of their faces. We use these workers. We profit from them. In the shadows, they work to the bone, for pennies. And it's so easy to blame them for everything andnothing simply because they are powerless, and dark-skinned,and speak with funny accents. Illegal is illegal. It is a phrase, shallow and cruel, that should prompt any decent American to burn with anger."
Author: Sergio Troncoso
28. "Books are funny little portable pieces of thought."
Author: Susan Sontag
29. "Isn't it funny to think that this magnificent piece of matter is in a state of decay? Really, can you think of any other living thing that looks this glorious as it's dying?"
Author: Tiffanie DeBartolo
30. "Nowadays they have 12 directors and 15 producers and 30 writers. And all the writers want their lines said a certain way-which isn't necessarily funny. I mean the lines aren't necessarily so funny to begin with."
Author: Tim Conway
31. "In the emergency of growing up, we all need heroes. But the father I grew up with was no hero to me, not then. He was too wounded in the head, too endlessly and terribly sad. Too funny, too explosive, too confusing. Heroes are uncomplicated. *This* makes them do *that*… But the war does not make sense. War senselessly wounds everyone right down the line. A body bag fits more than just its intended corpse. Take the 58,000 American soldiers lost in Vietnam and multiply by four, five, six—and only then does one begin to realize the damage this war has done… War when necessary, is unspeakable. When unnecessary, it is unforgivable. It is not an occasion for heroism. It is an occasion only for survival and death. To regard war in any other way only guarantees its inevitable reappearance."
Author: Tom Bissell
32. "If you want to think about something really funny, kiddo, consider the fact that our favorite modern bad guys became villains by serving as heroes first--to millions. It is now a necessary apprenticeship."
Author: William H. Gass
33. "It's great if you're funny or if you can dance, but if you are kind and decent, it comes out your pores."
Author: Yvette Nicole Brown

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The word of wisdom is missing," he continued. "We need the gift of discernment again in our pulpits. It is not ability to predict that we need, but the anointed eye, the power of spiritual penetration and interpretation, the ability to appraise the religious scene as viewed from God's position, and to tell us what is actually going on"
Author: A.W. Tozer

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