Top Funny Flea Markets Quotes

Browse top 22 famous quotes and sayings about Funny Flea Markets by most favorite authors.

Favorite Funny Flea Markets Quotes

1. "I'm not a comedian. I'm an actor who just happens to be funny on occasion."
Author: Anthony Anderson
2. "It was funny how all the useless knowledge you accumulated when you're in love with someone could sit for years gathering dust in the back of your mind, only to spill out at the slightest reminder."
Author: Blakney Francis
3. "If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now."
Author: Cassandra Clare
4. "When commercializing disruptive technologies, they found or developed new markets that valued the attributes of the disruptive products, rather than search for a technological breakthrough so that the disruptive product could compete as a sustaining technology in mainstream markets."
Author: Clayton M. Christensen
5. "[A] great embarrassing fact… haunts all attempts to represent the market as the highest form of human freedom: that historically, impersonal, commercial markets originate in theft."
Author: David Graeber
6. "Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends."
Author: Eminem
7. "So, Mr. Digence, home to visit the family?""That's right. My mother's folks are from Killarney.""Oh, really?""O'Reilly, actually. But what's a vowel between friends?""Very good. You should be on the stage.""It's funny you should mention that."The passport officer groaned. Ten more minutes and his shift would have been over. "I was being sarcastic, actually. . .""Because my friend, Mr. McGuire, and I are also doing a stint in the Christmas pantomime. It's Snow White. I'm Doc, and he's Dopey."The passport officer forced a smile. "Very good. Next."Mulch spoke for the entire line to hear. "Of course, Mr. McGuire there was born to play Dopey, if you catch my drift."Loafers lost it right there in the terminal. "You little freak!" he screamed. "I'll kill you! You'll be my next tattoo! You'll be my next tattoo!"Much tutted as Loafers disappeared beneath half a dozen security guards."Actors," he said. "Highly strung."
Author: Eoin Colfer
8. "At a flea market I always head for the junk jewelry table first."
Author: Ethel Merman
9. "IN my early days there were stories about funny refugees murdering the English language. A refugee woman goes to the greengrocer to buy red oranges (I mean red inside), very popular on the Continent and called blood oranges.‘I want two pounds of bloody oranges.'‘What sort of oranges, dear?' asked the greengrocer, a little puzzled.‘Bloody oranges.'‘Hm...' He thinks. ‘I see. For juice?'‘Yes, we are.'Another story dates from two years later. By that time the paterfamilias — the orange-buying lady's husband — has become terribly, terribly English. He meets an old friend in Regents Park, and instead of talking to him in good German, softly, he greets him in English, loudly.‘Hallo, Weinstock.... Lovely day, isn't it? Spring in the air.'‘Why should I?"
Author: George Mikes
10. "Those lips had curved into a knowing half smile that did funny things to her insides. And like a match tossed to gasoline, her body sparked alive and flames licked every inch of her."
Author: J. Lynn
11. "Mmmm... the comedy that matters is the comedy you pull out of thin air. It's a bit like when something funny has happened and you try to explain it to someone else and end up saying, 'You had to be there.'"
Author: Jack Dee
12. "As she watched, he examined the can intently, read the ingredients, then returned it to the shelf and chose another, repeating his thorough study of it.The contrast between his rough, tough-guy appearance and the domestic act he was performing did funny things to her head.She had a sudden, breathtaking vision of a dark-haired little boy sitting in the seat of the cart, laughing up at Cian, grabbing at his swinging braids with chubby little fists, while his daddy inspected the ingredients on a jar of baby food. Her mind's eyepicture of sexy, strong man with beautiful, helpless child made something soft and warm blossom behind her chest."
Author: Karen Marie Moning
13. "I've always been part of comedy. One of the things about our family was that if we were reasonably funny with each other, particularly my two brothers and myself, when my father was upset with something you'd want to make sure in some way you made him laugh. Because when he didn't laugh, you were in trouble!"
Author: Leslie Nielsen
14. "Isn't it funny that only twenty years ago, they were down there cowering in terror that we trigger-happy, decadent, capitalist Americans would go nuclear on them any minute? Little did they know our secret weapon was Starbucks."
Author: Magnus Flyte
15. "Oh senseless man, who cannot possibly make a worm or a flea and yet will create Gods by the dozen!"
Author: Michel De Montaigne
16. "Sometimes I was so funny I couldn't stand myself."
Author: Moira J. Moore
17. "When people say 'Charlie Chaplin' I still think now of the guy in the moustache and bowler hat and funny walk - I don't think of an old man who was my grandfather."
Author: Oona Chaplin
18. "Yeah, you're probably right. Love's a funny thing. The ones that want you, you don't want??the ones that you want, don't want you. It's a big, fat, fucking merry-go- round . . . and the bright, shiny horse is always on the other side of the carousel."
Author: Randall Kenneth Drake
19. "Isn't it funny to think that this magnificent piece of matter is in a state of decay? Really, can you think of any other living thing that looks this glorious as it's dying?"
Author: Tiffanie DeBartolo
20. "I was not funny growing up."
Author: Tim Meadows
21. "I'm obsessive about the kind of melodrama of getting through the days and trying to make them good and funny and a happy experience. But my feeling towards the fans is that they delivered me from darkness."
Author: Tom Baker
22. "You may as well say, 'That's a valiant flea that dare eat his breakfast on the lip of a lion."
Author: William Tecumseh Sherman

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My parents both had Oxford degrees, they read important books, spoke foreign languages, drank real coffee and went to museums for pleasure. People like that don't have fat kids: they were cut out to be winners and winners don't have children who are overweight."
Author: Arabella Weir

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