Top Funny Gonorrhea Quotes

Browse top 29 famous quotes and sayings about Funny Gonorrhea by most favorite authors.

Favorite Funny Gonorrhea Quotes

1. "I think you can go from being not very funny to working really hard for 10 years and figuring out how to make a living on the road, but I don't think you can rise much above that."
Author: Amy Schumer
2. "Love made you admire funny things about a person, like how good she was at remembering to return her library books and at slicing cucumbers very thin. She was a veritable wonder at pulling a splinter out of her foot."
Author: Ann Brashares
3. "Of course 'we humans' have a funny relationship with the beings with whom we share our planet. We eat them, we care for them, we admire them, we use them."
Author: April Gornik
4. "I feel funny about owning art. I don't really want to say: 'Wow, come and see my Monet - it's in a dark room at the bottom of my cellar.'"
Author: Baz Luhrmann
5. "He says you don't often find angels in places like happy homes and rich people's backyard parties. He says that angels flock to places like hospitals and homelss shelters and jails, because those people realize they need help. And do they are able to believe in strange phenomena. Funny how the world is backward. The really comfortable people don't always see much supernaturally, and to the ones who have to struggle, it's, like, breathing in their faces. The first are last... and the last are first."
Author: Carol Plum Ucci
6. "I used to say I wanted somebody funny and intelligent, but kindness is the most important quality in a man."
Author: Cat Deeley
7. "According to the rules of comedy, your suffering will be funny after an undetermined length of time. Maybe not while you're having your gangrenous leg sawed off, watching your home burn down or learning how to be intimate with your cellmate, but, in the big scheme of things, soon."
Author: Chuck Lorre
8. "The nightmare is you spend the rest of your life being funny at parties and then people say, 'Why didn't you do that when you were on television?'"
Author: Conan O'Brien
9. "When will you stop laughing at misery? I'm so sick and tired of your pseudo-strength. All I want you to do is laugh at what is funny and cry at what isn't, but you won't do that, will you?"
Author: David Shields
10. "I don't know why we insist on pain when pain is so often easy to eliminate. It's funny the ways we try to punish ourselves when we feel we've committed some crime."
Author: Deb Caletti
11. "I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man."
Author: Frank Carson
12. "Being normal is overrated. Normal gets you what—the dolt husband with the 2.5 kids and the house with the dog? You seriously want that? I mean, one of those kids is going to be really funny looking, by the way, all cut in half like that. Who wants half a kid?"
Author: H.M. Ward
13. "I know you can be funny without being filthy."
Author: Jonathan Winters
14. "It's funny to me that power comes from sitting behind a desk. It should come from spending yourself."
Author: Kirsty Eagar
15. "He thinks I'm beautiful and told me so. He thinks I'm funny because I make him laugh all the time. He's fantastic in bed and when I say that not once, not even once have we been together where he's not taken care of me and it's not unheard of he takes care of me twice in one go."
Author: Kristen Ashley
16. "I never liked apples. In fact, when I was a little girl, my mom wanted to give me apples in my lunch box and I would ask for green peppers. So bizarre... It's funny - I don't have an apple a day, but I can say that I have a few a week."
Author: Lana Parrilla
17. "I need to be cheered up a lot. I think funny people are people who need to be cheered up."
Author: Lynda Barry
18. "I thought for a moment about the dog. Miffy. I guess no matter how much Rube and I complained about him, we knew we'd sort of miss him if something happened to him. It's funny how there are things in this world that do nothing but annoy you, but you know you'd miss them when they're gone. Miffy, the Pomeranian wonderdog, was one such thing."
Author: Markus Zusak
19. "Evan Handler is not only a fine actor, he's a damn good writer. It's Only Temporary is wise and funny and as righteously indignant as it is endearingly self-effacing. In what may be a literary first, the book actually left me wanting more."
Author: Meghan Daum
20. "Plus, I love comic writing. Nothing satisfies me more than finding a funny way to phrase something."
Author: Michael Pollan
21. "My vanity is not dead. I laugh when I see pictures of myself as I am now-maybe so I won't cry, but just because it is really funny how much I've changed."
Author: Michael Zaslow
22. "There is a funny story I always tell my students...when I came for the first time to the US. I didn't speak English (Only Spanish) & I saw on every door the word "exit" which in Spanish means Success = Exito. And then I said :"No wonder Americans are winners ,every door they take leads to success" ~smile :)"
Author: Pablo
23. "You know,' Shane said twenty minutes later, 'I'd feel a whole lot better about the two of us if you didn't think i was the go-to guy for breaking and entering.'She felt a flash of guilt about the breaking-and-entering part -but she had called him- just before her heart did a funny little painful flip and she heard him say again in her head THE TWO OF US."
Author: Rachel Caine
24. "It's funny how you take things like electricity for granted. You hit the button that turns everything on and it just comes on. You get used to that and it just works every single time. So what happens when it suddenly doesn't? things very well could get messy."
Author: Robin Burks
25. "It's funny how two people can grow up in the same town, go to the same school, have the same friends, and end up so totally different. Family, or lack of it, counts for more than you'd think."
Author: Sarah Dessen
26. "And get some self-esteem. What the fuck is that? It's so annoying to see a pretty girl see herself as not worthy. You know what it makes us guys think you aren't worthy? We see you how you see you. You're pretty and funny and smart. Stop being such a douche-canoe."
Author: Tara Brown
27. "You are very clever,' said the old man shyly. 'I would like to eat your brains, one day,'For some reason the books of etiquette that Daphne's grandmother had forced on her didn't quite deal with this. Of course, silly people would say to babies, 'You're so sweet I could gobble you all up!', but that sort of nonsense seemed less funny when it was said by a man in war paint who owned more than one skull. Daphne, cursed with good manners, settled for, 'It's very kind of you to say so."
Author: Terry Pratchett
28. "What did you wrap my hand with?" he asked. "My thong." I looked up at him. "You were right ; it's totally uncomfortable. Awesome for first-aid though." The corners of T.J.'s mouth turned up slighty. He looked at me, his brown eyes showing a trance of the spark that had been missing the night before. "It'll make for a funny story someday," I said. "You know what, Anna? It's kinda funny now."
Author: Tracey Garvis Graves
29. "I've got a bunch of books... I rely on funny books and movies to cheer me up. Oh, but I must say, I do have the world's most perfect husband, so a cuddle from him always cheers me up. He's a good guy."
Author: Wendi McLendon Covey

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Better degrees don't automatically translate into better skills and better jobs and better lives."
Author: Andreas Schleicher

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