Top Funny Roadkill Quotes

Browse top 30 famous quotes and sayings about Funny Roadkill by most favorite authors.

Favorite Funny Roadkill Quotes

1. "And Talon did not understand – no, strike that, he didn‘t want to understand – why seeing Hawk and Roadkill together gave him a funny ache in the pit of his stomach. Every time he looked at Flit, the ache got worse. He needed to get laid."
Author: Aggy Bird
2. "What's funny is my husband doesn't have any tattoos at all, so he must be the very conservative one."
Author: Ashley Scott
3. "There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God."
Author: Bill Cosby
4. "It's funny how people mark their lives, the benchmarks they choose to decide when the moment is more of a moment than any other. For life is made of them. I like to think the best ones of all are in my mind, that they run through my blood in their own memory bank for no one else but me to see."
Author: Cecelia Ahern
5. "I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people."
Author: David Cross
6. "It was so good to see him in there, yet so funny to find him so much like me, and so tiny. "Nice kingdom you got here," I added, laughing again. "But it didn't feel quite right without you. Or should I say, without me?"This time he laughed too, and though there were no bubbles or sound I could feel his delight rise up through the water: which made me laugh even harder: which made him do the same.--Page 84, "The Brothers K"
Author: David James Duncan
7. "Very often, I don't make it through moments of recording because it is genuinely funny and absolutely ridiculous that a 60-year-old grown man is making these noises."
Author: David Ogden Stiers
8. "Robert Altman's 'Nashville' is my all-time favorite film because it covers all the bases - it's original, moving, and has something to say, but also funny and incredibly entertaining."
Author: Douglas Wood
9. "Because when I first saw you I thought-no, I knew-you were special. Because I still think that every time I look at you. Because I think you're smart and funny and brave. But most of all," he grins at me- "because I like questions."
Author: Elizabeth Scott
10. "Commitment is a funny thing, you know? It's almost like getting a tatoo. You think and you think and you think and you think before you get one. And once you get one, it's stick to you hard and deep."
Author: Ika Natassa
11. "It's funny how much easier it is to see others' shortcomings and give advice when you're not personally involved, for it's almost impossible to see the light when you're swimming in shit."
Author: Isabel Lopez
12. "I was always worried with comedy - what if I came to work and I wasn't in a funny mood? That hasn't been an issue."
Author: Jeremy Sisto
13. "I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive."
Author: Jerry Seinfeld
14. "MyrtleHow funny your name would beif you could follow it back to wherethe first person thought of saying it,naming himself that, or maybesome other persons thought of itand named that person. It wouldbe like following a river to its source,which would be impossible. Rivers have no source.They just automatically appear at a placewhere they get wider, and soon a realriver comes along, with fish and debris,regal as you please, and someonehas already given it a name: St. Benno(saints are popular for this purpose) or, orsome other name, the name of hislong-lost girlfriend, who comesat long last to impersonate that river,on a stage, her voice clankinglike its bed, her clothing of sandand pasted paper, a piece of real technology,while all along she is thinking, I cando what I want to do. But I want to stay here."
Author: John Ashbery
15. "I didn't grow up identifying with beauty. I grew up thinking I could be smart and funny - those are the things I got feedback on."
Author: Lauren Graham
16. "I reach for funny books all the time to help me get through life."
Author: Laurie Halse Anderson
17. "Many trees were pulled out of the ground with their roots crying for water." The lake was all polluted with thick layers of grease,the grass & flowers were squashed, animals walked around. #kidsbooks "Mikolay & Julia"Total elocological destruction,said Mikolay trying to use one of the funny long words Julia was always using.These are not monsters Farina.These are people and building machines."
Author: Magda M. Olchawska
18. "Isn't it funny that only twenty years ago, they were down there cowering in terror that we trigger-happy, decadent, capitalist Americans would go nuclear on them any minute? Little did they know our secret weapon was Starbucks."
Author: Magnus Flyte
19. "Who's straight? I'm not. I am bent gouged pinched and tugged at, and squeezed into this funny shape. Each life is a game of chess that went to hell on the seventh move, and now the flukey play is cramped and slow, a dream of constraint and cross-purpose, with each move forced, all pieces pinned and skewered and zugzwanged... But here and there we see these figures who appear to run on the true lines, and they are terrible examples. They're rich, usually."
Author: Martin Amis
20. "I'm smart and I can be really funny and interesting and I can go toe-to-toe with anybody in a conversation."
Author: Megan Fox
21. "For me, Twitter works best as a way of taking pictures of being stuck in traffic on the Brooklyn Bridge. If people really want to read really funny quips about life, parenting, and pop culture, then by all means read Michael Ian Black's tweets."
Author: Michael Showalter
22. "I think that Obama is very cool. And I think he's clever, and I think he can be witty. But I don't think he's funny in either the way that Reagan was funny - or John McCain and Dick Cheney are both funny in that ruthless, kind of mean way."
Author: Mo Rocca
23. "The cat dropped the rat between its two front paws. "There are those," it said with a sigh, in tones as smooth as oiled silk, "who have suggested that the tendency of a cat to play with its prey is a merciful one - after all, it permits the occasional funny little running snack to escape, from time to time. How often does your dinner get to escape?"
Author: Neil Gaiman
24. "Lot of ugly funny dudes end up with some pretty gorgeous women. Women are much deeper than us in choosing a mate - they see in the long term."
Author: Patton Oswalt
25. "In my old age, it's kind of funny - at night, what I like to do is watch TV when I go to sleep. And what I really like is to put on a Gene Autry film, because he sings really well. So he sings me to sleep."
Author: Phil Everly
26. "I think it's funny how excited people can get about things I say that don't have anything to do with music. I made a disparaging comment about McDonald's on Twitter once and people flipped out on me."
Author: Ron Pope
27. "Sex is funny and love is serious."
Author: Stephan Jenkins
28. "It's a funny habit to write encyclopedia entries. It's not a mass taste."
Author: Sue Gardner
29. "But a funny thing happened four years later. I was invited to play for an alumni team against the Red Wings."
Author: Ted Lindsay
30. "A cemetery?" I chuckle, but the pitch is a bit higher than I expected. "At night? With a full moon? Um ... did you see any, uh, zombies, you, while you were there?"Shiko blinks at me a few times. "No"I slump in relief. "Thank God. I mean, I don't want to be the first to die. The funny guy always dies first, for shock value, you know. Rourke would get killed next, because it's be a heroic sacrifice or something." I motion to Shiko. "You'd live, though, unless you had sex."... Shiko has the look of an addled kitten, complete with head tilt. Rourke sighs and leans toward her, embarrassed. 'You'll have to excuse him. According to his mother he has an irrational fear of something called the zombie apocalypse.""It's not irrational!"
Author: Vaughn R. Demont

Funny Roadkill Quotes Pictures

Quotes About Funny Roadkill
Quotes About Funny Roadkill
Quotes About Funny Roadkill

Today's Quote

Offstage, I couldn't put things into words, and that was the one thing I'd always been able to rely on. Putting my feelings into words and praying they wouldn't be able to get out again."
Author: Carrie Fisher

Famous Authors

Popular Topics