Top Poker Quotes

Browse top 169 famous quotes and sayings about Poker by most favorite authors.

Favorite Poker Quotes

1. "Yes, I think poker really isn't gambling."
Author: Al Alvarez
2. "I could think of worse ways of going than at the poker table."
Author: Al Alvarez
3. "And how we burned in the camps later, thinking: What would things have been like if every security operative, when he went out at night to make an arrest, had been uncertain whether he would return alive and had to say good-bye to his family? Or if, during periods of mass arrests, as for example in Leningrad, when they arrested a quarter of the entire city, people had not simply sat there in their lairs, paling with terror at every bang of the downstairs door and at every step on the staircase, but had understood they had nothing left to lose and had boldly set up in the downstairs hall an ambush of half a dozen people with axes, hammers, pokers, or whatever else was at hand? After all, you knew ahead of time that those bluecaps were out at night for no good purpose. And you could be sure ahead of time that you'd be cracking the skull of a cutthroat."
Author: Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
4. "I should be very much obliged if you would slip your revolver into your pocket. An Eley's No. 2 is an excellent argument with gentlemen who can twist steel pokers into knots. That and a tooth-brush are, I think, all that we need."
Author: Arthur Conan Doyle
5. "I plastered on my best poker face, attempting to appear cool and casual even thought I had never been so eager to deliver two Chicken Parmagianas in my life."Just be careful, hon," Rosanna said."Oh, are the plates hot?" I flinched back just before my hands made contact.Rosanna laughed. "No, but hot boys can burn just as easily."
Author: C.J. Duggan
6. "Joe's blue eyes turned a little watery; he rubbed first one of them, and then the other, in a most uncongenial and uncomfortable manner, with the round knob on the top of the poker."
Author: Charles Dickens
7. "At my first tournament, about four years ago, I got four twos. Now I have a poker problem. I do win every so often, so that's what keeps me going."
Author: Cheryl Hines
8. "Poker is meant to be enjoyed."
Author: Chris Moneymaker
9. "If you're a poker player and you show up at a casino at 8 a.m., you're going to be by yourself or with some people that are rocks and just don't give you any action."
Author: Chris Moneymaker
10. "Death by drowning, death by snakebite ... death by memory loss, death by claymore ... death by paper cuts, death by whoreknife, death by poker game ... death by authority, death by isolation, death by genocide, death by Kennedy ... death by signature, death by silence ... death by performance"
Author: Colum McCann
11. "There's more at risk in what happens in Microsoft than I could ever bet on a poker table."
Author: David Einhorn
12. "ESPN has this problem with sports, it's impossible to fill 24 hours with sports programming so they have to resort to things like poker and arm wrestling tournaments."
Author: Drew Curtis
13. "You have the opposite of poker face. You have like.. miniature golf face."
Author: Elizabeth Gilbert
14. "He smiled affably at the burglar, a burly fellow whom he continued to hold with one hand, as easily as if he had been a child. The entire household had been aroused, and a good number of them had joined in, shouting questions and brandishing various deadly instruments. The burglar glared wildly at Emerson, bare to the waist and bulging with muscle - at Gargery and his cudgel - at Selim, fingering a knife even longer than Nefret's - at assorted footmen armed with pokers, spits, and cleavers - and at the giant form of Daoud advancing purposefully toward him. 'It's a bleedin' army!' he gurgled. 'The lyin' barstard said you was some kind of professor!"
Author: Elizabeth Peters
15. "As you know, the International Poker Tour, by its own admission, knows very little about poker games, one of which ended tragically last week when an IPT-sanctioned tournament aboard a yacht in Australia accidentally used tarot cards instead of playing cards. That's right, it's true! Apparently no one noticed until someone laid down a full house and the dealer died."
Author: Elle Lothlorien
16. "I like it because when people use a lot of poker lingo, it usually means they've been playing the game for a while. Which is why I immediately avoid those people."
Author: Elle Lothlorien
17. "But any idiot can see you two are gaga for one another."? As in Lady Gaga? Because I do enjoy riding Wade's disco stick and? playing our own version of poker face. And even though I'm terrified we'll? wind up having a bad romance, leaving me to just dance while watching Wade ride off into the sunset with Alejandro as the paparazzi followed in a frenzy, I can't seem to stop myself from loving him.? I shook the nonsense out of my head."
Author: Ethan Day
18. "With words as valueless as poker chips, we play games whose object it is to keep us from seeing each other's cards."
Author: Frederick Buechner
19. "I sail, run dogs, ride horses, play professional poker and tell stories about the stuff I've been through. And I'm still a romantic; I still want Bambi to make it out of the fire."
Author: Gary Paulsen
20. "I kept my poker face on and listened to him with an air of interest and respect (I thought of what it says in one of Rand's novels, how the winner can afford to be generous)."
Author: Harvey Pekar
21. "You've got a goddamn bug today—you know that? What the hell's the matter with you anyway?" Franny quickly tipped her cigarette ash, then brought the ashtray an inch closer to her side of the table. "I'm sorry. I'm awful," she said. "I've just felt so destructive all week. It's awful. I'm horrible." "Your letter didn't sound so goddamn destructive." Franny nodded solemnly. She was looking at a little warm blotch of sunshine, about the size of a poker chip, on the tablecloth. "I had to strain to write it," she said."
Author: J.D. Salinger
22. "Jiggery pokery!" said Harry in a fierce voice. "Hocus pocus — squiggly wiggly —""MUUUUUUM!" howled Dudley, "He's doing you know what!"
Author: J.K. Rowling
23. "Here's a freebie: Don't play poker with a kid who can read minds."
Author: James Patterson
24. "I'm absolutely gonna win it, because I'm ruthless. I sit at the poker table and my job is to destroy people."
Author: James Woods
25. "We stared out at the city that hummed and glittered like a computer chip deep in some unknowable machine, holding its secret like a poker hand"
Author: Janet Fitch
26. "I have a house, with two big plasma-screen TVs, two dogs, a grill, chessboard. I like to keep it low-key: invite friends over, order some Papa John's pizzas and Coors Light, play poker and ping-pong and chill. I'm pretty private."
Author: Jared Padalecki
27. "I guess you don't get to watch much TV in Irkalla."He propped his head on one scaly bicep and turned to look at me. "Nah. We stayed busy torturing the souls of the damned and playing hide the hot poker. You know, the usual."
Author: Jaye Wells
28. "I became known as Lily Casey, the mustang-breaking, poker-playing, horse-race-winning schoolmarm of Coconino County, and it wasn't half bad to be in place where no one had a problem with a woman having a moniker like that."
Author: Jeannette Walls
29. "I met my boyfriend, a pro poker player, at a tournament. He tried to dissuade me because it's a seedy gritty world. Listen, I've played till 4 in the morning. I've played with a half million dollars on the table."
Author: Jennifer Tilly
30. "I have been on TV quite a few times as a poker player."
Author: Jerry Buss
31. "How do you plan to keep me here during the day? An unblooded Forbearer shouldn't be sohard to vanquish."Vanquished by her? Amusing. "I'll send you back to the cell. You want to be my pet? I'll takeyou out and put you back in your cage at my pleasure."She blinked at him. "You don't want to send me back. Who will entertain you? I can deal pokerand make shadow animals."
Author: Kresley Cole
32. "Poker isn't all about the cards. Poker's mostly about attention. You got a woman whose legs are like yours, tits are like yours, hair is like yours and ass is like yours, all she's gotta do for me is sit there and half the men at the table won't be concentrating on their cards. They'll be thinking about your legs, tits, hair and ass, how much they want 'em and just what they'd do to get 'em.""I appreciate the compliment, Ty, but I don't think I'm all that.""You got a dick?"I felt my mouth twitch.Then I answered, "No.""Trust me"
Author: Kristen Ashley
33. "I'm English. We're about as tactful as a hot poker up the bum, most of the time."
Author: L.H. Thomson
34. "That was just how we spoke. Every conversation a game of poker, every line a bet or a raise, a bluff or a call."
Author: Mark Lawrence
35. "As for poker, I've stayed away from that, even though when I was in Vegas for Ocean's Eleven, I would get accosted by these guys begging me to play. They just want to take my money. They see me, think 'actor' and see some easy money."
Author: Matt Damon
36. "Poor innocent baby, about to get fleeced. "Tut-tut, gorgeous. You know when you play poker with a man behind closed doors, there is only one acceptable currency."
Author: Nalini Singh
37. "Come on," he said. "Bring the poker."I brought the tongs as well. I felt like it."
Author: P.G. Wodehouse
38. "I love to go to casinos with my wife. I play poker, and she's an old-fashioned slot queen. She even has a visor."
Author: Patrick Wilson
39. "Every poker player is smarter than me."
Author: Penn Jillette
40. "Wah kayaknya keren nie situs poker online nya ,jadi bingung mau milih idrpoker.com agen texas poker online indonesia terpercaya atau Rgopoker.com Bandar Judi Poker Situs Poker Online Terpercaya"
Author: Rgopoker.com Bandar Judi Poker Situs Poker Online Terpercaya
41. "Very slowly using two fingers, Annabeth drew her dagger. Instead of dropping it, she tossed it as far as she could into the water. Octavian made a squeaking sound. "What was that for? I didn't say toss it! That could've been evidence. Or spoils of war!"Annabeth tried for a dumb-blonde smile, like: Oh, silly me. Nobody who knew her would have been fooled. But Octavian seemed to buy it. He huffed in exasperation. "You other two..." He pointed his blade a Hazel and Piper. "Put your weapons on the dock. No funny bus--"All around the Romans, Charleston Harbor erupted like a Las Vegas fountain putting on a show. When the wall of seawater subsided, the three Romans were in the bay, spluttering and frantically trying to stay afloat in their armor. Percy stood on the dock, holding Annabeth's dagger. "You dropped this," he said, totally poker-faced."
Author: Rick Riordan
42. "What I needed most was to love and to be loved, eager to be caught. Happily I wrapped those painful bonds around me; and sure enough, I would be lashed with the red-hot pokers or jealousy, by suspicions and fear, by burst of anger and quarrels."
Author: Saint Augustine
43. "Tanri zar atmaz. O kainat ile kendi tasarladigi, tarifi imkansiz bir oyunu oynar. Diger oyuncularin (Herkes) gözünden bakildiginda bu, karanlik bir odada, kurallari söylemeyen ve sürekli gülümseyen bir kart dagiticisinin dagittigi bos kartlarla oynanan, sonsuz risklere girilen, anlasilmasi imkansiz ve ne oldugu bilinmeyen bir poker oyununa benzer..."
Author: Terry Pratchett
44. "Being able to pit your wits against literally hundreds of other people is really exciting and ultimately the biggest single challenge for a poker player."
Author: Tim Page
45. "Suppose neutral angels were able to talk, Yahweh and Lucifer – God and Satan, to use their popular titles – into settling out of court. What would be the terms of the compromise? Specifically, how would they divide the assets of their early kingdom?Would God be satisfied the loaves and fishes and itty-bitty thimbles of Communion wine, while Satan to have the red-eye gravy, eighteen-ounce New York Stakes, and buckets of chilled champagne? Would God really accept twice-a-month lovemaking for procreative purposes and give Satan the all night, no-holds-barred, nasty "can't-get-enough-of-you" hot-as-hell-fucks?Think about it. Would Satan get New Orleans, Bangkok, and the French Riviera and God get Salt Lake City? Satan get ice hockey, God get horseshoes? God get bingo, Satan get stud poker? Satan get LSD; God, Prozac? God get Neil Simon; Satan Oscar Wilde?"
Author: Tom Robbins
46. "I'm not like a poker player. I'm not into bluff. My way is to look someone in the eye and tell them the way I'm intending to go. My cards are always on the table."
Author: Tori Amos
47. "If scientific reasoning were limited to the logical processes of arithmetic, we should not get very far in our understanding of the physical world. One might as well attempt to grasp the game of poker entirely by the use of the mathematics of probability."
Author: Vannevar Bush
48. "If you've been playing poker for half an hour and you still don't know who the patsy is, you're the patsy."
Author: Warren Buffett
49. "No, that's poker. To win, you've gotta get damned lucky."
Author: Wilford Brimley
50. "What I know about poker, you can fit into a thimble with room left over, but I'm learning."
Author: Wilford Brimley

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I long ago suggested the hypothesis, that in the basin of the Thames there are indications of a meeting in the Pleistocene period of a northern and southern fauna."
Author: Charles Lyell

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