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Top Jennifer Crusie Quotes

Browse top 34 most favorite famous quotes and sayings by Jennifer Crusie.

Favorite Jennifer Crusie Quotes

1. "You've lived in America for twenty years. Eat badly, damn it." ~ Jennifer Crusie
2. "Davy's kiss tasted like vodka and disaster, and even while she kissed him back, Tilda thought, I'm never going into a closet with this man again. He slipped his hand under her T-shirt, and she said, "You know," as his hand slid up to her breast, but the only thing left to say was, I'm not that kind of girl, and of course she was." ~ Jennifer Crusie
3. "He was not looking forward to breaking the law. He was straight now. He'd matured. Crime no longer excited him.What?' Ronald said.I didn't say anything.'You're breathing heavy." ~ Jennifer Crusie
4. "Bet you ten bucks we make it."What are the odds? she thought, and realized with sudden, blinding clarity that she wouldn't take the other side of that bet, that only a loser would bet against them. This is really it, she thought, amazed. This is really forever. I believe in this."Min?" he said, and she kissed him, putting all her heart into it. "No bet," she said against his mouth. "Your odds are too good.""Our odds are too good" ~ Jennifer Crusie
5. "Elvis!" Min shoved herself off the couch to shoo him away. "Stay away from there. There's broken glass.""He did that on purpose," David said, outraged."Yes, David, the cat is plotting against you." Min fished the base out of the water and glass shards and put it on the table. Then she went to get her wastebasket and began to put the glass pieces in it." ~ Jennifer Crusie
6. "You want sensitive and understanding, stick with the therapist.You want great,headbanging sex, get off the fucking phone and come with me." ~ Jennifer Crusie
7. "You know, I'm not even sure how we ended up living together.""I am," Jake said, turning back to the lake. "Sex. It's a powerful force, my boy, and women use it.""Is that why you gave them up?" Will asked, sympathetically. "Did paranoia drive you to celibacy?" ~ Jennifer Crusie
8. "At eleven, Kate woke Jake up when she went searching in the cooler for juice."You know, you used to be peaceful," he grumbled."I can't believe you were ever married." Kate said, as she cracked the can open. "What did you do, make her stand in the corner all the time?" ~ Jennifer Crusie
9. "I could shove this swizzle stick through his heart, Min thought. She wouldn't do it, of course. The stick was plastic and not nearly pointed enough on the end. Also people didn't do things like that in Southern Ohio. A sawed-off shotgun, that was the ticket." ~ Jennifer Crusie
10. "Say, ‘Thank you, Phin.' ""Oh, please.""Say, Thank youvery much, Phin. ""I don't think so.""Say, ‘You are a great lover, Phin.' ""I'm out of here." ~ Jennifer Crusie
11. "He looked like every glossy frat boy in every nerd movie ever made, like every popular town boy who'd ever looked right through her in high school, like every rotten rich kid who'd ever belonged where she hadn't.My mama warned me about guys like you.He turned to her as if he'd heard her and took off his sunglasses, and she went down the steps to meet him, wiping her sweaty palms on her dust-smeared khaki shorts. "Hi, I'm Sophie Dempsey," she said, flashing the Dempsey gotta-love-me grin as she held out her hot, grimy hand, and after a moment he took it.His hand was clean and cool and dry, and her heart pounded harder as she looked into his remote, gray eyes."Hello, Sophie Dempsey," her worst nightmare said. "Welcome to Temptation." ~ Jennifer Crusie
12. "He loved her all he could; but he couldn't love her very much." ~ Jennifer Crusie
13. "[…] I have a date this afternoon." "Oh, Lord." Jake closed his eyes. "Who are you going to destroy now?""I beg your pardon?""The hotel would appreciate it if you'd just throw back the men you don't like without maiming them.""I haven't maimed anyone.""You almost drowned Lance, you scared Peter into heart palpitations, you stabbed Donald with a fork, and you hit Brad over the head with a bottle." Jake shook his head. "And they still ask you out." ~ Jennifer Crusie
14. "That's not a father. That's a spermdonor. Forget him. He's a mess. Concentrate on me. I'm terrific. (Linc Blaise)" ~ Jennifer Crusie
15. "Of course it hurt you neanderthal! See that? Thats blood. If theres blood, theres pain. Its like smoke and fire." ~ Jennifer Crusie
16. "When Eve ate the apple her knowledge increased. But God liked dumb women so Paradise ceased. Gwen Goodnight. Her Work." ~ Jennifer Crusie
17. "Sophie held the [hand]cuffs higher, hopint to instill some sense of shame, if not in him, then at least in herself. One look at him and she wanted him again. "I found them in the bed.""That makes sense," Phin said. "That's where I lost them.""I'd ask what you were doing with them," Sophie said, trying not to sound bitchy, "but I probably don't want to know, do I?""Sure you do. It was exciting and different and depraved." Phin nodded toward the stairs. "Go put them someplace we can find them, and I'll show you later." ~ Jennifer Crusie
18. "Feel no guilt. Getting married and giving birth does not mean that you have sold your life away to perfectly healthy people who can get their own damn socks." ~ Jennifer Crusie
19. "Who was the moron on the phone?""Carl Avery," Kate said. "A long-standing client and potential felon." ~ Jennifer Crusie
20. "Nobody in my life has ever known me the way you do. Nobody in my life has ever made me feel as good as you do. You know me, you know everything about me, and when you leave me, you're going to be leaving the real me, the me nobody else has ever seen, that's who you're going to be rejecting." ~ Jennifer Crusie
21. "Kate picked up her coffee cup, frowning when she saw it was empty. "Did you drink my coffee?""Yes. I was feeling aggressive." ~ Jennifer Crusie
22. "North is a powerful man, and you're still connected to him." Flo frowned. "Probably sexual memory, those Capricorns are insatiable. Well, you know. Sea Goat. And of course, you're a Fish. You'll end up back in bed with him."Andie slammed the car door. "You know what I'd like for Christmas, Flo? Boundaries. You can gift me early if you'd like." ~ Jennifer Crusie
23. "have you ever met a woman you wanted to give everything to?just turn over everything you had?-Davy Dempsey-" ~ Jennifer Crusie
24. "This is a woman you've known less than twelve hours. It took you a year to pick out a couch, but you're seriously—""Yes," Roger said. "She's the one." ~ Jennifer Crusie
25. "First, I'm not getting married, so you can forget the wife. Second, if I was insane enough to get married, I wouldn't have kids. Third, if I was insane enough to get married and have kids, it would be a cold day in hell I'd let you babysit." ~ Jennifer Crusie
26. "Heartache often drives us to consume things we wouldn't otherwise, such as an entire pint of Caramel Pecan Perfection high-fat ice cream, covered in ganache, the crack cocaine of frozed dairy. Twelve hundred calories per pint, six hundred and eighty of which are fat calories, but is only dulls the pain for the moment, there's that carb fog while you're standing at the sink shoving it in your face, and then it's over and you feel...used. Like a cheap pickup the Dove people seduced and abandoned in your kitchen, leaving you with sticky hands and an empty cup and a still-broken heart, except now you're mad at Dove, too." ~ Jennifer Crusie
27. "Everybody's crooked. The trick is to find out how they're bent." ~ Jennifer Crusie
28. "That's a movie quote, right? You know, if you do that with books, people think you're intelligent."Sophie lowered her chin. "If this is your pathetic attempt to seduce me again, you're falling miserably." "I don't seduce woman." Phin shoved back his chair and stood up. "They fall into my open arms.""Clumsy of them." ~ Jennifer Crusie
29. "Dempseys are never in trouble. We just have stretches of life that are more interesting than others." ~ Jennifer Crusie
30. "Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love." ~ Jennifer Crusie
31. "Kid, I've only known you two days and I've seen you plastered three times." He shook his head. "A bar would not be a good career move for you." ~ Jennifer Crusie
32. "Nothing but good times ahead." ~ Jennifer Crusie
33. "I'm fine," Kate said. "In fact, since my last two dates were so awful, things can only get better.""Bad deduction," Jessie said. "If that were true, I'd be dating Harrison Ford by now." ~ Jennifer Crusie
34. "I suppose you had to," Wes said when Phin went back to join him at the table."Pretty much. She seduced me.""Yeah, right," Wes said. "She said, 'Please fix the kitchen drain,' and you interpreted that--""She said, 'Fuck me.' " Phin put two balls on the table and picked up his cue. "I interpreted that to mean she wanted sex.""Oh." Wes picked up his cue. "That would have been my call, too." He squinted at the table. "Why would she have said that?""On a guess? Because she wanted sex." ~ Jennifer Crusie

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Today's Quote

If we're stuck on one world, we're limited to a single case; we don't know what else is possible. Then—like an art fancier familiar only with Fayoum tomb paintings, a dentist who knows only molars, a philosopher trained merely in NeoPlatonism, a linguist who has studied only Chinese, or a physicist whose knowledge of gravity is restricted to falling bodies on Earth—our perspective is foreshortened, our insights narrow, our predictive abilities circumscribed. By contrast, when we explore other worlds, what once seemed the only way a planet could be turns out to be somewhere in the middle range of a vast spectrum of possibilities. When we look at those other worlds, we begin to understand what happens when we have too much of one thing or too little of another. We learn how a planet can go wrong."
Author: Carl Sagan

What Did Jennifer Crusie Talk About?

Said
Thin
She
Ear
Wit
Hen
Here
Ours
Again
Heart
Hear
Los
Off
Yes
Ten
Tan
Pick
Thou
Sex
Con
Course
Ask
Use
Hand
Head
Hey
Woman
Though
Turn
Stick
Twelve
Call
Per
Owe
Ally
Bed
End
Able
High
King
Known
Last
Lie
Lose
Mad
Married
Mean
Ought
Kid
Air

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