Beer Quotes

1. "Then he explains Chinese food in Manhattan to me: 'See the way it works is, there's one central location out on Long Island where all this stuff is made. Then it's piped into the city through a series of underground pipes that run parallel to the train and subway tracks. The restaurants then just pull a lever. One lever for General Tso's chicken, another for beef with broccoli sauce. It's like beer; it's on tap.' It's amazing how convincing he is when he says this. There's no pause in his description, nowhere for him to stop and think, to make this up as he goes along. It's as though he's simply repeating something he read in the Times yesterday. This makes me love him more than I did just five minutes ago."
Author: Augusten Burroughs

2. "I still say Kellyanne could do with some real-live mates," went on my dad, as if he was talking to someone inside his beer.Mum had stomped off into the kitchen. "Maybe they are real!" she shouted back at him after rattling a few plates together. "Ever thought about that, ye of little bloody imagination?"
Author: Ben Rice

3. "In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria."
Author: Benjamin Franklin

4. "Now that he was navigating, his celestial mood was shattered. Wild, animal thirst for life, mixed with homesick longing for the free airs and the sights and smells of earth-for grass and meat and beer and tea and the human voice-awoke in him."
Author: C.S. Lewis

5. "Drinking beer with friends is perhaps the most underestimated of all Reformation insights and essential to ongoing reform; and wasting time with a choice friend or two on a regular basis might be the best investment of time you ever make."
Author: Carl R. Trueman

6. "A friend complained that his brother-in-law had phoned and woken him up in the middle of the night. The brother-in-law said, "I like to drink a few beers every night. Do you think I've got a problem?" My friend said, "Well, I like to eat green beans every day, but I don't go callin people up at midnight to ask them if they think that means I've got a problem! So whadda you think?"
Author: Carolyn Jourdan

7. "My beerdrunk soul is sadder than all the dead christmas trees of the world."
Author: Charles Bukowski

8. "The book looked doomed, assailed on all sides by those who'd see it superseded by the synthetic-new and those who didn't give two shiny ones. With the recession forging ahead with renewed vigour, bookselling too was going the way of papyrus, taking with it what was left of Richard's self-esteem, his beer money and his comedic persona."
Author: Charlie Hill

9. "Whoever the guy was who taught her to suck c**k, he wanted to buy him a beer and punch his fucking lights out."
Author: Cherrie Lynn

10. "I think it would dismay them to know what it takes to feed you. Not to mention that you could empty their cellars of beer and wine in a single night.' Eragon said.I would never, Saphira sniffed. Maybe in two nights."
Author: Christopher Paolini

11. "I can still picture myself riding in the back of a Bronco to a field party after a rainstorm. My mama will kill me for saying this, but my first beer, I was 15 and I didn't know what to do with it. I thought you were supposed to chug it. So I just downed the whole thing in one gulp. All my friends were like, 'Duuuuuuude!'"
Author: Dave Haywood

12. "So how do you live with all this?" "Same way any guy survives life with a woman."  Michael's eyes twinkled.  "Beer, sex, and keep the freezer well stocked in chocolate ice cream."
Author: Debora Geary

13. "Turn the light on so your aim is better," he said mildly. "All you did was waste a full beer."
Author: Erin McCarthy

14. "So beer is our bread?"
Author: Garret Keizer

15. "For thus men seyth, "That on thenketh the beere,But al another thenketh his ledere."
Author: Geoffrey Chaucer

16. "Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day."
Author: George Carlin

17. "Behind all sorrows in the world Klepp saw a ravenous hunger; all human suffering, he believed, could be cured with a portion of blood sausage. What quantities of fresh blood sausage with rings of onion, washed down with beer, Oskar consumed in order to make his friend think his sorrow's name was hunger and not Sister Dorothy."
Author: Günter Grass

18. "...and every Wednesday the perfumed young lady slips me a hundred-crown note to leave her alone with the convict. And by Thursday the hundred crowns are already gone in so much beer. And when the visiting hour is over, the young lady comes out with the stink of jail in her elegant clothes; and the prisoner goes back to his cell with the lady's perfume in his jailbird's suit. And I'm left with the smell of beer. Life is nothing but trading smells."
Author: Italo Calvino

19. "I'd like to have a beer-holder on my guitar like they have on boats."
Author: James Hetfield

20. "To me, beer tastes like piss. Maybe that's why I only enjoy it in the shower with my uncle."
Author: Jarod Kintz

21. "Beer has that Olympic medal color," Rot replied, "but does it have a winning taste? I'd hardly call silver a champion flavor. No, I'll stick to my red wine.""
Author: Jarod Kintz

22. "I drink wine like beer, only twice as much less."
Author: Jarod Kintz

23. "The question for me was, could TV actually teach? I knew it could, because I knew 3-year-olds who sang beer commercials!"
Author: Joan Ganz Cooney

24. "And an extra loud shout-out to the Empire State Garrison, who came to Manhattan on a hot summer day to shoot Del Rey's Death Troopers trailer and didn't forget the blood … or the beer."
Author: Joe Schreiber

25. "Blaisedell, the poet, had said to him, 'You love beer so much. I'll bet some day you'll go in and order a beer milk shake.' It was a simple piece of foolery but it had bothered Doc ever since. He wondered what a beer milk shake would taste like. The idea gagged him but he couldn't let it alone. It cropped up every time he had a glass of beer. Would it curdle the milk? Would you add sugar? It was like a shrimp ice cream. Once the thing got into your head you couldn't forget it...If a man ordered a beer milk shake, he thought, he'd better do it in a town where he wasn't known. But then, a man with a beard, ordering a beer milk shake in a town where he wasn't known--they might call the police."
Author: John Steinbeck

26. "I'm an old-fashioned guy... I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something."
Author: Johnny Depp

27. "So, Noah smoked pot. I drank beer. We made a beautiful couple."
Author: Katie McGarry

28. "Voodoo Beer?""In honor of Loa and Boa for chasing away death." "That was a big snake, wasn't it?""It was a seriously large snake. . . ."
Author: Kresley Cole

29. "You wanna beer?"Jasper's brows shot up. "Seriously?""Fuck no," Layne replied."
Author: Kristen Ashley

30. "Now, I learned a long time ago how to be quiet on the outside while I'm freaking on the inside. How to turn away like I don't see all the things that need to be seen, just to keep peace. How to lie low and act like I want nothing, expect nothing, and hope for nothing so I don't become more trouble than I'm worth. I'm five months short of eighteen and I know how to be cursed and ignored and left behind, how to swallow a thousand tears and ignore a thousand delibarate cruelties, but it's two in the morning on New Year's Eve and I'm mad and scared and bone tired and really, really sick of acting like I'm grateful to be staying on a hairy, sagging, dog-stained couch in a junky, mildewed trailer with a fat, dangerous, volatile drunk who sweats stale beer and wallows in his own wastewater, and who doesn't think there's one thing wrong with taking his crap life out on his dog, who comes bellying back for forgiveness every single time, no matter how rotten the treatment-"
Author: Laura Wiess

31. "That tradition is the way our culture gets made. As I explain in the pages that follow, we come from a tradition of "free culture"—not "free" as in "free beer" (to borrow a phrase from the founder of the freesoftware movement[2] ), but "free" as in "free speech," "free markets," "free trade," "free enterprise," "free will," and "free elections." A free culture supports and protects creators and innovators. It does this directly by granting intellectual property rights. But it does so indirectly by limiting the reach of those rights, to guarantee that follow-on creators and innovators remain as free as possible from the control of the past. A free culture is not a culture without property, just as a free market is not a market in which everything is free. The opposite of a free culture is a "permission culture"—a culture in which creators get to create only with the permission of the powerful, or of creators from the past."
Author: Lawrence Lessig

32. "Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer... If one of those bottles should happen to fall, there'd be how many bottles of beer on the wall?"
Author: Lesley Kagen

33. "The old man sold beer after hours on weekends. And that was something that he probably did to top up his earnings as a truck driver. Mum was the traditional housewife. Loving, caring, sharing - always the keynotes of the family."
Author: Lindsay Fox

34. "Best beer I've ever had," I say."
Author: M. Leighton

35. "Materialism has defeated feminism as well. In a sign of the times, Gloria Steinem was on the picket line when the first American DeBeers store opened on Fifth Avenue in June 2005, protesting the evictions of Bushmen in Botswana to make room for diamond miners and the charges that the company dealt in "blood diamonds" used to finance civil wars in Africa.Her presence meant nothing to young Hollywood beauties who are pleased to shill for the diamond industry in magazine layouts and personal appearances.As Steinem stood outside, Lindsay Lohan was inside the party, gushing over the possibility that she could get to wear one of the big rocks.Asked by reporters about the Bushmen controversy, she shrugged it off: "I don't get involved in any drama."
Author: Maureen Dowd

36. "Curse you, cheap beer. Must find miso in tiny packet."
Author: MCM

37. "Mensen zijn dom. Op een trommel slaan om een beer aan het dansen te krijgen, terwijl we de sterren zouden willen ontroeren."
Author: Michael Cunningham

38. "She paused and saw him tense in expectation. He wouldn't like to hear this, but better from her than one of the others. "You aren't the only pilot I have in my service. And you aren't the only person with a dark past, though the illegal things that you did, you were forced to do by the Core. But I will tell you what I've told the others. This is your last chance. You screw up with me and you get shipped up river. I don't offer second chances—I offer last chances."Nope, he didn't like it. She saw the hand not holding the bottle of beer curl into a fist.Sin and Del, from Sunscapes Trilogy, Book 1: Last Chance"
Author: Michelle O'Leary

39. "Isn't beer the holy libation of sincerity? the potion that dispels all hypocrisy, any charade of fine manners? the drink that does nothing worse than incite its fans to urinate in all innocence, to gain weight in all frankness?"
Author: Milan Kundera

40. "The only gig I can remember playing in those very early days — and I think it was with Rare Breed, but it could have been under a different name, with different band members, 'cos line-ups changed so often back then — was the Birmingham Fire Station's Christmas party. The audience consisted of two firemen, a bucket and a ladder.We made enough dough for half a shandy (beer mixed with lemonade), split six ways."
Author: Ozzy Osbourne

41. "He's a bar-room socialist, if that's what you mean. Beer and revolution go in, piss come out"
Author: Pat Barker

42. "Very intense first summer out, to be 18 years old and never having gone on a date, never having smoked a cigarette, never had a drink, even a sip of beer, never kissed a girl, all of those things. It made for a fairly intense first year out."
Author: Peter Jurasik

43. "I guess in my beer-soaked mind it would all just magically work out, and she'd be so happy to see me she'd forget about everything else. Because everybody loves having the drunken self-pitying boyfriend banging on their door at, Jesus, four thirty in the morning."
Author: Rachel Caine

44. "I never had one beer. If I bought a six-pack of beer, I kept drinking till all six beers were gone. You have to have that kind of understanding about yourself. I haven't had a drink now in 12 years."
Author: Samuel L. Jackson

45. "Oh, about beer I never lie,' Crandall said. ‘A man who lies about beer makes enemies."
Author: Stephen King

46. "Hana: What on Earth is a 'barbeque'? Hel: A primitive tribal ritual featuring paper plates, elbows, flying insects, encrusted meat, hush puppies, and beer. Hana: I daren't ask what a 'hush puppy' is. Hel: Don't."
Author: Trevanian

47. "Let us reflect, if we wish to be brilliant. Too much improvisation empties the mind in a stupid way. Running beer gathers no froth. No haste, gentlemen."
Author: Victor Hugo

48. "I like to eat crawfish and drink beer. That's despair?"
Author: Walker Percy

49. "...when you are constantly prevailing upon the kindness of strangers-as a hitchhiker must-it keeps you in a positive frame of mind. Call it Zen and the Art of Hitchhiking. The Way of the Lift. The chrysanthemum and the Thumb. Heady on beer and the sound of my own voice, the aphorisms spilled out unchecked."
Author: Will Ferguson

50. "Not if you pay attention. I mean, you're sending all the right signals - no earrings, heels under two inches, your hair is pulled back, you're wearing reading glasses with no book, drinking a Grey Goose martini, which means you had a hell of a week and a beer just wouldn't do it. And if that wasn't clear enough, there's always the "fuck off" sign that you have stamped on your forehead."
Author: Will Smith

Beer Quotes Pictures