Being 51 Quotes

1. "Before you are admitted to British citizenship you are not even considered a natural human being.I looked up the word natural (na'tural) in the Pocket Oxford Dictionary (p. 251); it says: Of or according to or provided by nature, physically existing, innate, instinctive, normal, not miraculous or spiritual or artificial or conventional.... Note that before you obtain British citizenship, they simply doubt that you are provided by nature."
Author: George Mikes

2. "You must not suppose that I would like you to profess religion without possessing it. A hypocrite is in my opinion one of the most detestable of beings. my opinion is, that every one should honestly and carefully investigate the Bible; and if he can believe it to be the word of God, to follow its teachings." - Brevet Major Thomas J. Jackson (1 March 1851)"
Author: James I. Robertson Jr.

3. "The private detective of fiction is a fantastic creation who acts and speaks like a real man. He can be completely realistic in every sense but one, that one sense being that in life as we know it such a man would not be a private detective."(Letter, April 19, 1951)"
Author: Raymond Chandler

4. "Scientists at first were skeptical that a kitten-type being could exist in the rare Martian atmosphere. As a test, two Earth kittens were put in a chamber that simulated the Martian air. The diary of this experiment is fascinating:6:00 A.M.: Kittens appear to sleep.7:02 A.M.: Kitten wakes, darts from one end of cage to another for no apparent reason.7:14 A.M.: Kitten runs up wall of cage, leaps onto other kitten for no apparent reason.7:22 A.M.: Kitten lies on back and punches other kitten for no apparent reason.7:30 A.M.: Kitten leaps, stops, darts left, abruptly stops, climbs wall, clings for two seconds, falls on head, darts right for no apparent reason.7:51 A.M.: Kitten parses first sentence of daily newspaper that is at bottom of chamber.With the exception of the parsing, all behavior is typical of Earth kitten behavior. The parsing activity, which was done with a small ball-point pen, was an anomaly."
Author: Steve Martin

5. "Since, on a socio-economic level, there are myriad wrongs that need tobe righted, a major problem for the species seems to be how to assistthe unfortunate, throttle the corrupt, preserve the biosphere, andeffectively organize for socio-economic alteration wihtout theorganization being taken over by dullards, the people who, ironically,are best suited to serving organized causes since they seldom haveanything more imaginative to do and, restricted by tunnel vision,probably wouldn't do it if they had. 151"
Author: Tom Robbins

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