Funny Daycare Quotes

1. "Halfway down the stairs, is a stair, where I sit. There isn't any, other stair, quite like, it. I'm not at the bottom, I'm not at the top; So this is the stair, where, I always, stop. Halfway up the stairs, isn't up, and isn't down. It isn't in the nursery, it isn't in the town. And all sorts of funny thoughts, run round my head: It isn't really anywhere! It's somewhere else instead!"
Author: A.A. Milne

2. "Every animal is a tradition, and together they are a vast part of our heritage as human beings. No animal completely lacks humanity, yet no person is ever completely human. By ourselves, we people are simply balls of protoplasm. We merge with animals through magic, metaphor, or fantasy, growing their fangs and putting on their feathers. Then we become funny or tragic; we can be loved, hated, pitied, and admired. For us, animals are all the strange, beautiful, pitiable, and frightening things that they have ever been: gods, slaves, totems, sages, tricksters, devils, clowns, companions, lovers, and far more."
Author: Boria Sax

3. "A fellow who has a funny bone can learn to hone his skills, but I don't think you can develop a funny bone - you either have it or you don't. And by the way - when you get it, we don't know it."
Author: Carl Reiner

4. "I do feel like guys feel pressure to be funny with me, which is kind of annoying. It's a turn-off if someone's trying hard to be funny because it feels like they're auditioning for a comedy job or something. It doesn't feel romantic to me. I get so much comedy from my life that, from a guy, I'm more looking for something sweet or romantic."
Author: Chelsea Peretti

5. "Jonathan Lynn is one of the last actors Orsen Welles used in a production. It was wonderful. He's very sharp, very sharp. It's funny I've been asked how weird it was to have a Brit do a church gospel movie."
Author: Cuba Gooding Jr.

6. "But movies as much as anything developed what I thought was right and wrong, what was honorable, what wasn't, what was funny what wasn't... what had some depth to it, what didn't."
Author: Dabney Coleman

7. "My mom's passionate and energetic and very funny and enthusiastic."
Author: Eric Stonestreet

8. "I love New York on summer afternoons when every one's away. There's something very sensuous about it- overripe, as if all sorts of funny fruits were going to fall into your hands."
Author: F. Scott Fitzgerald

9. "IN my early days there were stories about funny refugees murdering the English language. A refugee woman goes to the greengrocer to buy red oranges (I mean red inside), very popular on the Continent and called blood oranges.‘I want two pounds of bloody oranges.'‘What sort of oranges, dear?' asked the greengrocer, a little puzzled.‘Bloody oranges.'‘Hm...' He thinks. ‘I see. For juice?'‘Yes, we are.'Another story dates from two years later. By that time the paterfamilias — the orange-buying lady's husband — has become terribly, terribly English. He meets an old friend in Regents Park, and instead of talking to him in good German, softly, he greets him in English, loudly.‘Hallo, Weinstock.... Lovely day, isn't it? Spring in the air.'‘Why should I?"
Author: George Mikes

10. "People have sex, even the religious ones. Yet, when sex is transferred into words, suddenly it's dirty, vulgar, immoral, trashy. Funny huh?"
Author: Hector Himeros

11. "I always feel a little funny being in front of a lot of people trying to show them my approach to the ukulele, but I do enjoy it. I do get a little more nervous doing workshops rather than performing."
Author: Jake Shimabukuro

12. "And she was funny and beautiful and she liked the same books, the same music, and she wanted everything I did, was in the exact same place I was in life, and just like that, add water and mix, instant love."
Author: Jami Attenberg

13. "The denizens of Feyland find the absence of magic to be quite funny. I mean no offense. ""None taken.""For example – In the Land Over the Crystal River (for that's how we refer to humans), there was once a man and a woman. And the man was in love with the woman, and wanted her for himself. But because he had no magic, he couldn't feel whether or not there was a "pull" towards her or not, so he didn't know whether she loved him or not. So what did he do?""What?""He had to ASK her!" Kian couldn't help laughing."I don't get it!""Ask her!" said Kian. "It's funny – because he didn't have magic." His laughter grew louder and less controlled, tinkling like bells in the winter snow. "He had to ask her!"I realized that there were some cultural barriers Kian and I might never transcend."
Author: Kailin Gow

14. "Evan Handler is a man who's looked into the abyss and laughed. His book, It's Only Temporary, made me laugh along with him. He covers love, lust, showbiz, triumph, and despair – and he manages to be both funny and inspiring about all of it. It's an important book that I think can help to spread goodness around the world. Something we desperately need."
Author: Lance Armstrong

15. "It is so exquisitely funny and sad, the way we view each other; how very little, despite our best efforts, we communicate."
Author: Luke Davies

16. "'Dear Mr. Argeneau,'" she began. " 'I haven't read Love Bites, One, but I will, I guarantee it. I just finished Love Bites, Two, and thought it was wonderful. Etienne was so sweet and funny and sexy that I fell in love with him even as Rachel did. He's my dream man.'" Kate paused and glanced up expectantly. "What would you say to those letters?"That was easy enough. "Etienne is taken."-Kate and Lucern"
Author: Lynsay Sands

17. "It's funny - nowadays people that are famous get chased by paparazzi. They have this fame, but they don't have the money to hide from it."
Author: Matt LeBlanc

18. "Eight people show up. The emcee is warm, friendly, and about as funny as Shoah. I take the stage to the sound of, my hand to God, one person clapping once and only once, and then I start into my act."
Author: Patton Oswalt

19. "Death isn't a funny thing. We're all lucky to be living."
Author: Pauly Shore

20. "Hm funny you think you truly know me all tell you this only my trust of friends know who I relay am"
Author: Pikmin100xx

21. "A funny thing about women and machines: the combination made men curious."
Author: Rachel Kushner

22. "Donna: You're not saying much.The Doctor: No, it's just— It's a funny old life. In the TARDIS.Donna: You don't want me.The Doctor: I'm not saying that.Donna: But you asked me. would you rather be on your own?The Doctor: No. Actually no. But. The last time, with Martha—like I said, it got complicated. And that was all my fault. I just want a mate.Donna: You just want to mate?!The Doctor: I just want a mate.Donna: Well you're not mating with me, sunshine!The Doctor: A mate! I just want a mate.Donna: Well it's just as well, because I'm not having any of that nonense. I mean you're just a long streak of... nothing! Alien nothing.The Doctor: There we are then."
Author: Russell T Davies

23. "You know, if you play on home soil sometimes funny things can happen and you have that push of the crowd."
Author: Ruud Gullit

24. "It's a funny feeling, being suddenly airborne. Just as you realize it, it's over, and you're sinking."
Author: Sarah Dessen

25. "It's funny how you call me a celebrity. Oh man."
Author: Steven Hill

26. "Veil, you see, if I vas to say something portentous like "zer dark eyes of zer mind" back home in Uberwald, zer would be a sudden crash of thunder,' said Otto. 'And if I vas to point at a castle on a towering crag and say "Yonder is . . . zer castle" a volf would be bound to howl mournfully.' He sighed. 'In zer old country, zer scenery is psychotropic and knows vot is expected of it. Here, alas, people just look at you in a funny vay."
Author: Terry Pratchett

27. "I've got a bunch of books... I rely on funny books and movies to cheer me up. Oh, but I must say, I do have the world's most perfect husband, so a cuddle from him always cheers me up. He's a good guy."
Author: Wendi McLendon Covey

Funny Daycare Quotes Pictures