Funny Hot Tubs Quotes

1. "I started the day with some nothin' tea. Nothin' tea is easy to make. First, get some hot water, then add nothin'."
Author: Andy Weir

2. "[Daemon's] arms tightened, drew her closer as his hand stroked up and down her back, just for the simple pleasure of it. She sighed. The tension in her muscles eased a bit, and she rested against him more fully. He wasn't thinking of seduction when his hands began to wander over her—or when her hands hesitantly stroked him. He wasn't thinking of seduction when his body delighted in how different the silky skin of her neck felt under his mouth compared to the robe beneath his hands. He wasn't thinking of sex when he opened his robe and then hers so that only that film of spidersilk separated skin from skin. Or when even the spidersilk no longer separated them. He wasn't thinking of sex when his mouth settled over hers and he sent them both sliding into dark, hot desire. And by the time he found himself in bed, listening to her purr with pleasure while he moved inside her, he wasn't able to think at all."
Author: Anne Bishop

3. "Blustery cold days should be spend propped up in bed with a mug of hot chocolate and a pile of comic books."
Author: Bill Watterson

4. "It was funny how all the useless knowledge you accumulated when you're in love with someone could sit for years gathering dust in the back of your mind, only to spill out at the slightest reminder."
Author: Blakney Francis

5. "It's so funny that people specify that year because in a way it was the biggest battle for me health wise."
Author: Brady Anderson

6. "Isn't it funny the way some combinations of words can give you--almost apart from their meaning--a thrill like music?"
Author: C.S. Lewis

7. "(Americans think we Brits drink tea because we're polite and genteel or something, whereas we really drink it because it's a stimulant and it's hot enough to sterilize cholera bacteria.)"
Author: Charles Stross

8. "No, by God, you've accused me of coldness, but howcan you, when you can feel how hot my body is againstyours? You've said I have none of the red-blooded passionof my sex, but you don't know. You," he gasped, pressingagainst her with a hard thrust of his hips, "you will know it—the depth of my passion. But you will."
Author: Charlotte Featherstone

9. "It's so funny looking back, but my so-called overnight success actually took 15 years. I remember when I didn't have any money, and my only car was mom's Hyundai."
Author: Criss Angel

10. "I started out of course with Hemingway when I learned how to write. Until I realized Hemingway doesn't have a sense of humor. He never has anything funny in his stories."
Author: Elmore Leonard

11. "It is not funny that anything else should fall down; only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh? Because it is a gravely religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified."
Author: G.K. Chesterton

12. "No wonder Wonderland isn't funny to read anymore: We live there full time. We need a break from it."
Author: Gregory Maguire

13. "Thinking about lunch. Smoked salmon with pedigreed lettuce and razor-sharp slices of onion that have been soaked in ice water, brushed with horseradish and mustard, served on French butter rolls baked in the hot ovens of Kinokuniya. A sandwich made in heaven"
Author: Haruki Murakami

14. "Then his mouth took hers.Julianna didn't have a chance. It was the Alamo all over again. Warm, capable lips molded perfectly to hers and with one push, his tongue slipped into her mouth. Like a marauding pirate, he conquered and enjoyed his territory, his hot tongue thrusting in and out in a teasing game before he dove deep and claimed his treasure."
Author: Jennifer Probst

15. "All masculine, hard-bodied and sensual, he was a deadly weapon sent by the gods to drive women mad, and a walking billboard for all things wicked and carnal. Orgasms! Get your orgasms here. Hot and juicy! Just how you like ‘em!"
Author: Lisa Sanchez

16. "Oh my God", Marc rhapsodized. "Who is that ?""An asshole," I mumbled, turning back to him and picking up my tea. I was so rattled I sloshed some of the hot liquid on my hand, but I didn't feel a thing."He's coming over here !" Marc squealed. "Oh my God, oh my God, ohmyGod!""Will you get a hold of yourself?" I hissed. "You sound like a girl with a crush. Ah-ha!"
Author: MaryJanice Davidson

17. "Who's to say where funny stops and 'too far' starts?"
Author: Michael Patrick King

18. "He was a humorist, and everyone knew the funny writers were the most serious sort under their skins."
Author: Paula McLain

19. "But who am I if I'm not Janie the bulimic? Bulimia has become so much a part of me that I can't remember what it felt like not to purge. It's been this secret that I have hidden from my parents and my friends (well, except for Nancy) and the rest of the world. It's the way I can let off the pressure of always feeling like I'm not smart enough, I'm not thin enough, not pretty enough, not funny enough, just plain not enough enough."
Author: Sarah Darer Littman

20. "I'm not ill like that," she groaned. He sat on her bed, peeling back the blanket. A servant entered, frowning at the mess on the floor, and shouted for help."Then it what way?""I,uh..." Her face was so hot she thought it would melt onto the floor. Oh you idiot. "My monthly cycles finally came back!"His face suddenly matched hers and he stepped away, dragging his hand through his short hair. "I-if...Then I'll take my leave," he stammered, and bowed. Celaena raised an eyebrow, and then, despite herself, smiled as he left the room as quick as his feet could go without running, tripping slightly in the doorway as he staggered into the rooms beyond."
Author: Sarah J. Maas

21. "God, I've just figured out what's missing – you ditched the hallowed Albermarle Teddy Bear!' I nodded.   ‘Banished to a dark cupboard for all eternity.' ‘You cold-hearted bastard.' ‘Give me a hot water bottle any day.   At least they have some appreciable function.   Not like that pathetic pile of overpriced fake fur and anthropomorphic bullshit I locked in the wardrobe.'‘You have serious teddy bear issues."
Author: Tabitha McGowan

22. "I don't really talk about my personal life. It's a strange and funny and weird thing. Sometimes you have a conversation with someone and the paparazzi snaps a picture of you and people decide you're dating. If I try to answer everything people say, I would be up all night."
Author: Tracee Ellis Ross

Funny Hot Tubs Quotes Pictures