Hypocrites Funny Quotes

1. "I'm not a comedian. I'm an actor who just happens to be funny on occasion."
Author: Anthony Anderson

2. "It's so funny looking back, but my so-called overnight success actually took 15 years. I remember when I didn't have any money, and my only car was mom's Hyundai."
Author: Criss Angel

3. "See you in the funny pages...mate"
Author: Daniel H. Wilson

4. "It's funny how guilty people start to question your spirituality and education only because they have nothing to say that will justify their faults."
Author: J.B. Albano

5. "When they were all up playing in the nursery George caught something again and had monia on account of getting cold on his chest and Yourfather was very solemn and said not to grieve if God called little brother away. But God brought little George back to them only he was delicate after that and had to wear glasses, and when Dearmother let Eveline help bathe him because Miss Mathilda was having the measles too Eveline noticed he had something funny there where she didn't have anything. She asked Dearmother if it was a mump, but Dearmother scolded her and said she was a vulgar little girl to have looked. "Hush, child, don't ask questions. Evaline got red all over and cried and Adelaide and Margaret wouldn't speak to her for days on account of her being a vulgar little girl."
Author: John Dos Passos

6. "I'm a reliable witness, you're a reliable witness, practically all God's children are reliable witnesses in their own estimation--which makes it funny how such different ideas of the same affair get about."
Author: John Wyndham

7. "People are not two-thirds one thing and the remainder something else. Temperament, personality, or outlook don't divide quite like that. The bits don't separate clearly. You end up a funny homogeneous mixture. This is something that will become more common in the latter part of the century—people with mixed cultural backgrounds, and mixed racial backgrounds. That's the way the world is going."
Author: Kazuo Ishiguro

8. "It only took Alexis a day to read a five-hundred page book. Fiction stories took her to another world where she could lose herself for a while in someone else's life.Its funny how things like loans to pay back, a broken home and family, and a future to worry about meant nothing to characters who only had to worry about things like boys, beaches and fun."
Author: Lindsay Chamberlin

9. "Priss tried to open her door, but it still didn't budge. "Unlock it."Instead he pulled her around to face him. He started to blast her, but something funny happening. Instead of reading her the riot act, he stared into her eyes, then down at her mouth. His entire demeanor changed. He looked just as tense, but now for different, hotter reasons.He still stared intently at her mouth when Priss heard the lock click open. She glanced down and saw that Trace had reached back for the door, all without breaking that disturbing, electrifying visual contact with her.She met his gaze again, and softened. Damn, but resisting Trace wouldn't be easy, not if he kept looking at her like that. "You're coming in, too?""Yes." Suddenly, almost violently, he turned away from her and left the car. Still a gentleman, he strode around to her side and opened her door. "Let's get this night over with."Well. That sounded insulting."
Author: Lori Foster

10. "My wife is so funny and talented and never lets anybody fail next to her."
Author: Mark Consuelos

11. "I think since I'm not particularly well-known as myself, it's funny all the different perceptions people have of me. Like, if someone's only seen me in 'Death Proof,' they think I'm sort of a ditzy girl who says stupid things and wears revealing outfits all the time."
Author: Mary Elizabeth Winstead

12. "The funny thing in France is that writers are not allowed to retire, because the French government say you are still earning money from books you wrote 20 years ago."
Author: Peter Mayle

13. "'Portnoy's Complaint' was very far out there, and movies have always worked when you have either a funny situation between two or more people or a very dramatic situation. There's not that much difference."
Author: Richard D. Zanuck

14. "Very slowly using two fingers, Annabeth drew her dagger. Instead of dropping it, she tossed it as far as she could into the water. Octavian made a squeaking sound. "What was that for? I didn't say toss it! That could've been evidence. Or spoils of war!"Annabeth tried for a dumb-blonde smile, like: Oh, silly me. Nobody who knew her would have been fooled. But Octavian seemed to buy it. He huffed in exasperation. "You other two..." He pointed his blade a Hazel and Piper. "Put your weapons on the dock. No funny bus--"All around the Romans, Charleston Harbor erupted like a Las Vegas fountain putting on a show. When the wall of seawater subsided, the three Romans were in the bay, spluttering and frantically trying to stay afloat in their armor. Percy stood on the dock, holding Annabeth's dagger. "You dropped this," he said, totally poker-faced."
Author: Rick Riordan

15. "Rachel would call the vet this morning, they would get Church fixed, and that would put this whole nonsense of Pet Semataries(it was funny how that misspelling got into your head and began to seem right) and death fears behind them."
Author: Stephen King

16. "But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that."
Author: Wanda Sykes

Hypocrites Funny Quotes Pictures