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Top Mrs Joe Gargery Quotes

Browse top 24 famous quotes and sayings about Mrs Joe Gargery by most favorite authors.

Favorite Mrs Joe Gargery Quotes

1. "A man of the mouth, formerly the most oral of surgeons, Henry had the habit of giving his lady patients laughing gas, putting them out, then fiercely fucking them, while tugging on their wisdom teeth. His getting caught was a slip of the tongue, so to speak. While he was buried deep in a muff, some sharp thing slipped, and his prize patient, Mrs Mavis Gilette, woke to find a harpoon hole in her cheek and her lost licker languishing on the floor."
Author: A.M. Homes
2. "My dad started shouting," he said, hearing the sharpness, the anger, in the background all over again. "He told her to ask me if I was still a fag." Casey swallowed and looked at Joe helplessly. "I mean, I turned down a date with Dev to make this phone call, right? He's… he's getting damned good at the hand job… thought we might progress from there… and she's asking me if I'm still ‘one of them' and I'm thinking, ‘One of what? A boy? A high school student? What the hell am I one of?' and I say, ‘I still like boys, Mom,' and suddenly Dad's got the phone and he's shouting at me that I didn't get to come home, ever, if I was still a sissy little—"
Author: Amy Lane
3. "That was… oh, God, Joe. That was… I honestly didn't know what the fuss was all about. God. We can do that again, right? Please tell me we can do that again!" Joe's lips curved up into a slow smile. "Give me fifteen minutes and a washcloth and we can probably do it again tonight. Good enough for you?" Casey smiled back, unbelievably sexy in the dark of the room. "Yeah, old man—I'll be impressed as hell if that's all it takes. But I wouldn't object." Joe pushed Casey's sweaty hair from his eyes. "I love you, kid. There's not much I wouldn't do to make you happy." Casey's grin turned serious. "I love you too, Joe. You know that, right?" "I do," Joe said softly. "I do. And I believe it with everything, or we wouldn't be here." The grin returned, but it was luminous and brighter this time. "Good."
Author: Amy Lane
4. "So, who's going to tell Mrs Beale she's got a month to plan a wedding feast ?"Hell's fire. Mrs Beale was a marvelous cook. She also had what he considered an unnatural relationship with her meat cleaver. Since he'd inherited SaDiablo Hall, he had gained a finer appreciation of why his father had stayed away from anything to do with the kitchen unless cornered. The woman was downright scary at times.The fact that she and Beale, the Hall's butler, were happily married was something he tried not to think about because it made him wonder things about Beale he'd rather not wonder."If we both went to Amdarh, we could just write her a note," Jaenelle said.He looked at Jaenelle. She looked at him."Good idea," he said."
Author: Anne Bishop
5. "Laurence, not sure what to do, remained standing below the steps."And who is this?" Mrs Hamlyn asked.Patrick looked back. "His name is . . . Laurence, mistress."Mrs Hamlyn scrutinized the boy before her. "Where does he come from?" she said, finding him scrawny and dirty."He came to America on the same ship we did."Mrs Hamlyn pursed her lips. "He's very ragged. Is he from Ireland too?""England.""But a friend of yours?"Laurence and Patrick looked at each other."Is he?" Mrs Hamlyn asked again.Patrick said, "He saved my life, twice.""Did he? Then he must be a good friend indeed."
Author: Avi
6. "Christianity happens when men and women accept with unwavering trust that their sins have not only been forgiven but forgotten, washed away in the blood of the Lamb. Thus, my friend archbishop Joe Reia says, "A sad Christian is a phony Christian, and a guilty Christian is no Christian at all."
Author: Brennan Manning
7. "Here's Joe Cool hanging around the student union"
Author: Charles M. Schulz
8. "It was one of the secret opinions, such as we all have, of Peter Brench, that his main success in life would have consisted in his never having committed himself about the work, as it was called, of his friend Morgan Mallow. This was a subject on which it was, to the best of his belief, impossible with veracity to quote him, and it was nowhere on record that he had, in the connexion, on any occasion and in any embarrassment, either lied or spoken the truth. Such a triumph had its honour even for a man of other triumphs--a man who had reached fifty, who had escaped marriage, who had lived within his means, who had been in love with Mrs Mallow for years without breathing it, and who, last but not least, had judged himself once for all."
Author: Henry James
9. "This is it--what all the hoopla is about, what Wuthering Heights is about--it all boils down to this feeling rushing through me in this moment with Joe as our mouths refuse to part. Who knew all this time I was one kiss away from being Cathy and Juliet and Elizabeth Bennet and Lady Chatterley!?"
Author: Jandy Nelson
10. "We don't usually write up accidents involving rabbits.- Joe Morelli"
Author: Janet Evanovich
11. "Amy Martin (ladysky) and Daniel Baciagalupo had a month to spend on Charlotte Turner's island in Georgian Bay; it was their wilderness way of getting to know each other before their life together in Toronto began. We don't always have a choice how we get to know one another. Sometimes, people fall into our lives cleanly--as if out of the sky, or as if there were a direct flight from Heaven to Earth--the same sudden way we lose people, who once seemed they would always be part of our lives. Little Joe was gone, but not a day passed in Daniel Baciagalupo's life when Joe wasn't loved or remembered. The cook had been murdered in his bed, but Dominic Baciagalupo had had the last laugh on the cowboy. Ketchum's left hand would lvie forever in Twisted River, and Six-Pack had known what to do with the rest of her old friend"
Author: John Irving
12. "Atlantic's Jerry Wexler believes first-rate records are made by first-rate voices. He certainly has worked with enough of them: Clyde McPhatter, Joe Turner, La Vern Baker, Ray Charles, Otis Redding, Solomon Burke, Wilson Pickett and Aretha Franklin."
Author: Jon Landau
13. "History isn't the lies of the victors, as I once glibly assured Old Joe Hunt; I know that now. It's more the memories of the survivors, most of whom are neither victorious or defeated."
Author: Julian Barnes
14. "I didn't feel like a slut, a bad mother, a terrible person. I didn't worry about my nudity or if he liked what I was doing. This shit was natural, like I was born to be in Joe Callahan's bed and it was natural to him too, like Joe Callahan was born to be in me."
Author: Kristen Ashley
15. "When Benedict dies, he will have the pleasure of standing before whatever furious God he believes in, to answer for how it was that he knew for undeniable fact that one -- if not dozens -- of his priests repeatedly molested, abused and/or raped young children for decades, and he did nothing to stop it. How much does God believe the pope's argument that Vatican PR trumps pedophilia? Joe Ratzinger, 82, will soon find out."
Author: Mark Morford
16. "A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold."
Author: Marlo Thomas
17. "What would she be saying if she did? That she did want to marry him? For ten years, at least, since she was twelve or thirteen, Rosa had been declaring roundly to anyone who asked that she had no intention of getting married, ever, and that if she ever did, it would be when she was old and tired of life. When this declaration in its various forms had ceased to shock people sufficiently, she had taken to adding that the man she finally married would be no older than twenty-five. But lately she had been starting to experience strong, inarticulate feelings of longing, of a desire to be with Joe all the time, to inhabit his life and allow him to inhabit hers, to engage with him in some kind of joint enterprise, in a collaboration that would be their lives. She didn't suppose they needed to get married to do that, and she knew that she certainly ought to not want to. But did she?"
Author: Michael Chabon
18. "I do not know, at this point, whether Joshua Joseph Spork is the man of my life. He could be. I have given it considerable thought. The jury is still out. The issue between you and me is that you wish to deprive me of the opportunity to find out. Joe Spork is not yours to give or to withhold from me, Mr. Cummerbund. He is mine, until I decide otherwise. You have caused him grief, sullied his name, and you have hurt him. If anyone is going to make him weep, or lie about him, or even do bad things to him, it is me."
Author: Nick Harkaway
19. "I think I could describe the perfect quarterback. Take a little piece of everybody. Take John Elway's arm, Dan Marino's release, maybe Troy Aikman's drop-back, Brett Favre's scrambling ability, Joe Montana's two-minute poise and, naturally, my speed."
Author: Peyton Manning
20. "I'd made myself some hot chocolate, located a book with a lot of murder and mayhem,curled up on a loveseat near the fireplace, and was happily envisioning Joe as the corpse of this tale."
Author: Rachel Hawthorne
21. "Boy, you are outta line!" Joe yelled. "I'm outta line?! You're screwing a vampire!" "You hypocritical little bastard!" "Yeah, you're a hypocripical-hypocri-hyp-hyp-hyp, I HATE THAT WORD!"
Author: S.L.J. Shortt
22. "LADY CROOM: You have been reading too many novels by Mrs Radcliffe, that is my opinion. This is a garden for The Castle of Otranto or The Mysteries of Udolpho --CHATER: The Castle of Otranto, my lady, is by Horace Walpole.NOAKES: (Thrilled) Mr Walpole the gardener?!LADY CROOM: Mr Chater, you are a welcome guest at Sidley Park but while you are one, The Castle of Otranto was written by whomsoever I say it was, otherwise what is the point of being a guest or having one?"
Author: Tom Stoppard
23. "General manager Frank Lane made his mark on the club by making several unpopular or unsuccessful trades. Among the guys he traded to other teams are Rocky Colavito, Roger Maris, Norm Cash, and … manager Joe Gordon? Uh, yes. Lane and Detroit GM Bill DeWitt traded managers—Joe Gordon for Jimmy Dykes. Lane's tenure ended shortly thereafter, long before the damage he caused."
Author: Tucker Elliot
24. "Black men of our day were never told, The sky's the limit. ... We could aspire to Joe Louis but never Henry Ford."
Author: Walter Mosley

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Today's Quote

Kilmartin wrote a highly amusing and illuminating account of his experience as a Proust revisionist, which appeared in the first issue of Ben Sonnenberg's quarterly Grand Street in the autumn of 1981. The essay opened with a kind of encouragement: 'There used to be a story that discerning Frenchmen preferred to read Marcel Proust in English on the grounds that the prose of A la recherche du temps perdu was deeply un-French and heavily influenced by English writers such as Ruskin.' I cling to this even though Kilmartin thought it to be ridiculous Parisian snobbery; I shall never be able to read Proust in French, and one's opportunities for outfacing Gallic self-regard are relatively scarce."
Author: Christopher Hitchens

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