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Top Seinfeld Quotes

Browse top 23 famous quotes and sayings about Seinfeld by most favorite authors.

Favorite Seinfeld Quotes

1. "I wouldn't call myself a standup in the presence of Jerry Seinfeld or Chris Rock, but I do my share of it and it has been and remains part of my activity and I like it."
Author: Alan Thicke
2. "If you take 'Cheers' and 'Seinfeld' and watch the early shows, they're kind of awkward. It took a while for the writers and everything to gel."
Author: Amanda Peet
3. "I've never seen 'Seinfeld', never seen 'The Cosby Show'; I just don't watch it. I saw half of 'Oprah' one time. I'd rather read."
Author: August Wilson
4. "I gazed around the room and my eyes stopped dead on a little boy standing in the corner. This was a particularly eerie doll. Life-sized and blond-haired and blue-eyed. I saw a little Nazi boy, pockets probably stuffed with scissors and retractable blades. My grandfather on my mother's side was rumored to be half Jewish, which practically makes me Jerry Seinfeld's brother, and thus wary of blond German boys with their hands out of sight."
Author: Augusten Burroughs
5. "I hate shows, personally, where people stand around tossing stuff at each other, and any character can say any line, because you don't believe any of these characters care for each other. I used to fight with my friends who wrote on 'Seinfeld,' because they had such great pride in saying it was a show about nothing."
Author: Bill Lawrence
6. "Come on, who saw what happened?""I did," I volenteered."Well?""Buttwipe wanted to know what jerkface was looking at." I turned turned eyes on the bloody and dirt-smeared brawlers. "You were barely 3-inches apart. Couldn't you see that you were both looking at each other?"The teacher's face reddened. "Who do you think you are? Jerry Seinfeld?""You must be confused with another student," I told him. "My name is Capricorn Anderson."
Author: Gordon Korman
7. "Provides American business with the only reliable domestic market in the world.Schools train individuals to respond as a mass. Boys and girls are drilled in being bored, frightened, envious, emotionally needy, generally incomplete. A successful mass production economy requires such a clientele. A small business, small farm economy like that of the Amish requires individual competence, thoughtfulness, compassion, and universal participation; our own requires a managed mass of leveled, spiritless, anxious, familyless, friendless, godless, and obedient people who believe the difference between Cheers and Seinfeld is a subject worth arguing about."
Author: John Taylor Gatto
8. "Washington's all abstraction. It's about access to power and nothing else. I mean, I'm sure it's fun if you're living next door to Seinfeld, or To Wolfe, or Mike Bloomberg, but living next door to them isn't what New York is about, In Washington people literally talk about how many feet away from John Kerry's house their own house is. The neighborhoods are all so blah, the only thing that turns people on is proximity to power. It's a total fetish culture. People get this kind of orgasmic shiver when they tell you they sat next to Paul Wolfowitz at a conference or got invited to Grover Norquist's breakfast."
Author: Jonathan Franzen
9. "The girls in high school who watched 90210? I was watching Seinfeld."
Author: Josh Schwartz
10. "The Seinfeld motto: No learning, no hugging."
Author: Julia Louis Dreyfus
11. "And Seinfeld is so quick: we crank out one show a week, and the hours are very reasonable."
Author: Julia Louis Dreyfus
12. "In our first season we had a 22 rating. Today Seinfeld, a hit show, gets a 15. Lost in Space actually had a bigger audience than Star Trek got at that time."
Author: Mark Goddard
13. "And secondly, losing your virginity doesn't make you a slut. I slept with your father when I was your age. . . ''Mia,' my father roared from the other room.'What? So we're going to lie to her now,?' she shouted back.He walked in. 'What if your mother finds out? Or my mother?''Robert, it was twenty years ago. I don't think there's much they can do.'He looked at me, pointing a finger. 'No sex for you.' He used the Soup Nazi's accent from Seinfeld."
Author: Melina Marchetta
14. "When I was on 'The Golden Girls,' we'd have eight scenes per show. And when 'Seinfeld' came along, they went to, like, 30 scenes a show, which was revolutionary. 'Arrested Development' has probably got 60 scenes per show. It just keeps emerging as this more and more complex thing. I always try to keep it very simple at its heart."
Author: Mitchell Hurwitz
15. "He'd never seen Seinfeld, so he didn't know who Puddy was or anything."
Author: Patrick Warburton
16. "I'll work with Jerry Seinfeld any day of the week. Get a nice little paycheck there, but you do it for free. It's just good to be associated with that man. He's a great guy."
Author: Patrick Warburton
17. "Never met Levinson. Ever. He directed those American Express spots for us for Seinfeld, and I was off on some guest spot that I didn't even want to do... and I got talked into doing it."
Author: Patrick Warburton
18. "I grew up loving David Letterman and Pee-wee Herman, but as far as live performance comedy, all I knew were the Jerry Seinfeld-type comedians of the world, and that's what I thought live performance comedy was all about."
Author: Scott Aukerman
19. "I watch sitcoms like Seinfeld, and here's a newsflash, but what a great show."
Author: Scott Wolf
20. "I was young enough to certainly realize the excitement of how popular 'Seinfeld' was."
Author: Tim DeKay
21. "You all watched a sketch about feminism and you didn't even know it because of all the jokes. It's like when Jessica Seinfeld puts spinach in kids' brownies. Suckers!"
Author: Tina Fey
22. "I don't really get a chance to watch much television. I mostly watch BBC Worldwide and repeats of Seinfeld and Everybody Loves Raymond."
Author: Will Estes
23. "I mean, comedy's hard. If you go back and look at the first season of 'Seinfeld,' it's a work in progress and that's what happens. It just takes time for people to figure each other out, and figure out timing, and to develop creatively with the writers."
Author: Zachary Knighton

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Today's Quote

Den har tilhørt bestefar, sa hun, og glattet på seddelen med de slanke fingrene sine. Han likte papirpenger - hadde for vane å bruke dem som bokmerker. Det er over tredve år siden han døde, men fremdeles finner jeg alle slags sedler stukket inn mellom bladene i bøkene hans."
Author: Beth Hoffman

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