Spongebob Squarepants Quotes

1. "[Reverend James] Dobson says that the [Spongebob Squarepants] video would be watched by millions of elementary school students and includes a reference to being 'tolerant of differences.' The nerve! Who does Spongebob think he is? Jesus Christ? Tolerance will not be, uh, tolerated. Oh, and tolerance is quite possibly closesly connected to gay-ance."
Author: Celia Rivenbark

2. "Elves, pixies, gnomes- the Moomins, Chorlton and the Wheelies, SpongeBob SquarePants- they all tried to invade you at some point."
Author: Jacqueline Rayner

3. "What, you didn't pack your lunch?" Ty asked sarcastically as he shifted around in the seat and wedged himself against the door. He kicked a foot up and propped it on the console between the two front seats. "Sure, in my SpongeBob SquarePants lunch box. I have the thermos, too," Morrison shot right back. Zane kept his mouth shut, eyes moving between the two men, and occasionally back to the driver, who was casually paying attention. Ty stared at the kid and narrowed his eyes further. "Spongewhat?" he asked flatly. Zane didn't even try to hold back the chuckle when Morrison looked at Ty like he'd lost his mind. "Spongewha … you're yanking my chain, aren't you?" Morrison said. "Henny, he's yanking my chain." "Yeah, well, that's what you getting for waving it in his face," the driver answered reasonably. "What the hell is a SpongeBob?" Ty asked Zane quietly in the backseat."
Author: Madeleine Urban

4. "I do like a lot of things that a lot of adults would scoff at. 'SpongeBob SquarePants,' 'Looney Tunes.'"
Author: R. L. Stine

5. "How about that? You can hear NFL Films music on everything from 'SpongeBob SquarePants' to 'Deep Throat.'"
Author: Steve Sabol

6. "In fact, gone are the days of having sex at all. I have resorted to jerking off alone in the bathroom after my wife's asleep. It's a sad, lonely existence when you have to take your cell phone into the shitter so you don't wake your wife when you pull up the YouPorn app and crank one out. The worst part is the SpongeBob SquarePants shower curtain in the bathroom. Do you know how difficult it is to keep an erection while SpongeBob is staring at you with his big, googly eyes and you keep hearing the song "Jellyfishin', Jellyfishin', Jellyfishin" in your head?"
Author: Tara Sivec

7. "'SpongeBob SquarePants' is a great show, and it centers on a character that is courageously nice. Why is SpongeBob interesting? It's because he has passion. He has a passion for chasing jellyfish."
Author: Vince Gilligan

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