Tequila Quotes

1. "You smell like tequila and sexual repression, Caroline."
Author: Alice Clayton

2. "Well, look at it this way," Robin reasoned as I sat with him and Geoff at their kitchen table that night, half-plastered from the pitcher of margarita they'd blended up. Was I going to have a tequila hangover in the morning? Oh, honey, you bet your sweet ass I was. And how many fucks did I give?Not a one."Even if you were overreacting to read what you read into this guy's offer—which I don't think you were, though I doubt he actually thought it through enough to intend it to be read that way—you still have to ask yourself: What's in it for you, hanging around some motel room waiting for a married man to make a booty call? What benefit would you get out of that situation, or out of prolonging your relationship with him? He might not have meant it to be an insulting offer, but it was absolutely a one hundred percent selfish offer. There was no upside for you whatsoever, unless the sex really was just that amazing."
Author: Amelia C. Gormley

3. "So nothing! Look, I get that coming here meant you could finally do things on your own, but you are just supposed to just take sips of freedom Norah – don't just slam it down your throat like a tequila shot!"
Author: Angela Richardson

4. "El teléfono estaba sobre la colcha, pequeño, negro y siniestro. Lo miró sin tocarlo. Bip-bip. Aterrada. Bip-bip. Su zumbido iba mezclándose con las palabras de la canción, como si formase parte de ella. Porque los contrabandistas, seguían diciendo los Tigres, ésos no perdonan nada. El Güero había usado las mismas palabras, riendo como solía hacerlo, mientras le acariciaba la nuca y le tiraba el teléfono encima de la falda. Si alguna vez suena, es que me habré muerto. Entonces, corre. Cuanto puedas, prietita. Corre y no pares, porque ya no estaré allí para ayudarte. Y si llegas viva a donde sea, échate un tequila en mi memoria. Por los buenos ratos, mi chula. Por los buenos ratos."
Author: Arturo Pérez Reverte

5. "America hadn't really been suited for its long and tiresome role as the Last Superpower, the World's Policeman. As a patriotic American, Oscar was quite content to watch other people's military coming home in boxes for a while. The American national character wasn't suited for global police duties. It never had been. Tidy and meticulous people such as the Swiss and the Swedes were the types who made good cops. America was far better suited to be the World's Movie Star. The world's tequila-addled pro-league bowler. The world's acerbic, bipolar stand-up comedian. Anything but a somber and tedious nation of socially responsible centurions."
Author: Bruce Sterling

6. "Every town has its secrets." He began. "San Felipe is no different. Skeletons are hidden in closets for a reason my friend. And trust me when I tell you, San Felipe has many skeletons. The moral of the story is; don't go snooping into strange closets. You will only find sins and betrayal. Why do you think we drink tequila so much?"
Author: Carroll Bryant

7. "You're lucky this is a big night for you, Bliss. Normally, nobody gets between me and my tequila."
Author: Cora Carmack

8. "If I have a near-beer, I'm near beer. And if I'm near beer, I'm close to tequila. And if I'm close to tequila, I'm adjacent to cocaine."
Author: Craig Ferguson

9. "If you think the hangover from tequila shots is bad, wait till you've had junkie blood."
Author: Cyma Rizwaan Khan

10. "They were back. The demons in all their glory. And they had a plan. I made plans sometimes, too, but they rarely involved world domination. Hot dogs on a grill, maybe. Tequila."
Author: Darynda Jones

11. "Exposed like butt cheeks at a strip club; chicken breasts, fleshy and sallow in the butcher's case; tequila bottle soldiers lined up across the bar's back wall."
Author: Dennis Vickers

12. "Drink [the shot of tequila], Mia." He repeated, quietly, using my name this time. He leaned in close to me so that I could feel the heat of his body. "Believe me," His eyes locked on mine and in a hoarse voice he whispered, "you're going to want to be drunk for what I'm going to do to you tonight."
Author: Donya Petrock

13. "Never date a man who can't out-drink you in tequila."
Author: Gina L. Maxwell

14. "We left behind this small townBut we couldn't leave behind the ghostsAs we headed for the coast, yeah, and you knowThere was something in the way she told meHow my hair looked stupid, andHow she couldn't hold her tequila, andHow she was broken and beautiful andStill standing, and how was I supposed to knowAll along we were saving JuneSaving June, yeahShe had flowers in her hair and one powerful glareMy modern day Rubik's Cube, she made me feelLike maybe we could have it allBut you can never have it allAnd now I've gone and lostAll these things that they always sang aboutAll the things that I still dream aboutNow I'm counting up the days, counting all the waysI never said what it means, but it's too late 'causeJune is over and so are weAnd I'm the one left, with nothing to save"
Author: Hannah Harrington

15. "I have been instrumental in banning bottled water on the set. It hasn't gone that well with the crew... so I replaced it with tequila."
Author: Hugh Laurie

16. "We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls.Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can."
Author: Hunter S. Thompson

17. "The trunk of the car looked like a mobile police narcotics lab. We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers . . . and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls . . . Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon."
Author: Hunter S. Thompson

18. "After you, it's all cheap tequila."
Author: Jacqueline Carey

19. "Sheets, towels and blankets surrounded Travis. He had fashioned a soft pallet to sleep on while I expelled the fifteen shots of tequila I'd consumed the night before. Travis had held my hair out of the toilet, and sat with me all night."
Author: Jamie McGuire

20. "Ali wrinkled her forehead and cocked her head to the side. Clearly, she hadn't prepared herself for me to be pleasant. After a moment, her eyes narrowed. "What exactly did you and Lake did yesterday?" she asked, like we might have held up a gas station and gone on a crime spree across the country, all in the span of just a few hours."We went to Mexico, had some tequila, eloped with a pair of drug smugglers, and took part-time jobs as exotic dancers. You know, same old, same old."Ali snorted."I'm torn on stripper names. It's either going to be Lady Love or Wolfsbane Lane. Thoughts?"Ali threw a onesie at me. "Brat."
Author: Jennifer Lynn Barnes

21. "I've found, though, that people are more likely to share their personal experiences if you go first, so that's why I always keep an eleven-point list of what went wrong in my childhood to share with them. Also I usually crack open a bottle of tequila to share with them, because alcohol makes me less nervous, and also because I'm from the South, and in Texas we offer drinks to strangers even when we're waiting in line at the liquor store. In Texas we call that '_southern hospitality_.' The people who own the liquor store call it 'shoplifting.' Probably because they're Yankees.I'm not allowed to go back to that liquor store."
Author: Jenny Lawson

22. "That's the last time I put you in charge of the tequila when we're making margaritas"
Author: JoAnne Kenrick

23. "I wanted to do my part to help preserve that golden age of travel... I step aboard The Patron Tequila Express railcar, and I go back in time to the days when a long journey was something fun and very special."
Author: John Paul DeJoria

24. "Immer wieder erstaunlich, was so ein paar Flaschen Tequila für die Völkerfreundschaft tun können."
Author: Jonas Jonasson

25. "I like to go dancing, have a few beers. I like being alone, too. I have days where it's 'God, get me a shot of tequila.'"
Author: Justine Bateman

26. "They will say I smoked cigarettes and marijuana, cursed hoarse as a crow in all my languages, and loved morphine and Demerol and tequila and pulque, women and men. I will shrug my illusion of shoulders and answer that I am a water woman, not a vessel, not something you can sail or charter. I am instead the tributary, the river, the fluid source, and the sea itself. I am all her rainy implications. And what do you, with your rusted compass, know of love?"
Author: Kate Braverman

27. "Hey, ah, does anyone want a cookie or something? Oh yeah. A cookie. That would make everything better. Dunked in a shot of tequila , maybe? Or better yet, just the bottle? Yeah, that ought to do it."
Author: Kim Harrison

28. "I grabbed my shot of tequila. Then I tossed it back. When I put my empty down to the bar and after I took in a deep breath, I informed her, "I like you. I need a new best friend. I've added you to the top of a list that has one name. Yours."
Author: Kristen Ashley

29. "Are you here to freak me out in any other way?""Nope.""This would include asking me for a date," I warned."Babe, don't date," he replied."You don't?""Do tequila shots followed by 5 hours of sex count as a date? he asked."Um... no," I answered."Then I don't date."I smiled at him.Then, stupidly, I asked. "You can have sex for 5 hours?"He smiled at me.Yikes.Moving on."
Author: Kristen Ashley

30. "And no one drank just one shot of tequila."
Author: Kristin Hannah

31. "We each cope differently with the specter of our deaths. Some people deny it. Some pray. Some numb themselves with tequila. I was tempted to do a little of each of those things. But I think we are supposed to try to face it straightforwardly, armed with nothing but courage."
Author: Lance Armstrong

32. "It took me several minutes to persuade myself to watch the news. During which time I gave myself a stern talking to. That turned into me considering a local pub that would be the perfect place to drown my sorrows in a barrel of tequila, though after much introspection, I scratched the idea just to avoid needless drunken embarrassment. Then, admittedly, I contemplated pouncing Andrew for another steamy romp session. Despite its proven potency to assuage stress and tension, I decided now was not the time to indulge in explosive sexcapades."
Author: Laura Kreitzer

33. "Tequila. Straight. There's a real polite drink. You keep drinking until you finally take one more and it just won't go down. Then you know you've reached your limit."
Author: Lee Marvin

34. "All the tequila in the world couldn't get her out of his mind and he knew it. She was in his head and in his heart to stay."
Author: M. Leighton

35. "More money than the crooks at Enron and less taste than a drunk after a bottle of tequila"
Author: Maria Lima

36. "Sublime is something you choke on after a shot of tequila."
Author: Mark Z. Danielewski

37. "Outside the Bar Del Prado, night was coming on like a hopeless, drunken come-on, tequila on its breath, red neon signs and, outside the shops, strings of colored Christmas lights hung from the eaves like the sad, close-lipped smiles of boys who would lure you in with their loneliness, that melancholia you'd try and try to fix."
Author: Michaela Carter

38. "A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any other invention with the possible exceptions of handguns and Tequila."
Author: Mitch Ratcliffe

39. "Maybe she was drunk - the woman never could drink. One little sniff of tequila and she was off into some blonde la-la land."
Author: P.C. Cast

40. "Tequila! Would you not think fallen angels would be immune to it." "Fallen, hate that word! I prefer..misplaced"
Author: Paul Guildea

41. "He didn't save us ; haven't you been listening?" Elizabeth held an icepack to her chin where she'd been hit by an meaty elbow . "Fiona stabbed one of them with a Susan Bates needle, Marie was wielding a tequila bottle, Sandra pistol-whipped the other, and I shot the third.""Where were Janie and Kat?" Ashley looked from me to Kat."Hiding behind the couch like sane people!" Kat said before anyone else could speak."
Author: Penny Reid

42. "Tequila makes me dream up things like dance battles."
Author: Rachel Hollis

43. "Drinking tequila is more about the journey than the destination"
Author: Rainbow Rowell

44. "There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong."
Author: Ron White

45. "But at least he thinks I have a boyfriend, I tell myself. It could be worse. If he thought I was interested in him for real then I would have to dig a hole and bury myself in it because the smug would be too much to bear.I reach automatically for my computer and open it up. I need some music to drown my shame in. Some people have tequila to send them into catatonic oblivion, I have music."
Author: Sarah Alderson

46. "Ricky was a young boy, he had a heart of stone./Tequila in his heartbeat, his veins burned gasoline./18 and life you got it."
Author: Skid Row

47. "Um, tequila please?" I asked questioningly, enunciating each word as best as my drunken mouth would allow. So really, it came out as "Uff, shakira pea?"
Author: Tara Sivec

48. "Champagne was discovered by a Catholic monk," said Bernard. "Took one swallow and burst out of his cellar yelling, 'I'm drinking stars, I'm drinking stars!' Tequila was invented by a bunch of brooding Indians. Into human sacrifice and pyramids. Somewhere between champagne and tequila is the secret history of Mexico, just as somewhere between beef jerky and Hostess Twinkies is the secret history of America. Or aren't you in the mood for epigrams?"
Author: Tom Robbins

49. "Now tequila may be the favored beverage of outlaws but that doesn't mean it gives them preferential treatment. In fact, tequila probably has betrayed as many outlaws as has the central nervous system and dissatisfied wives. Tequila, scorpion honey, harsh dew of the doglands, essence of Aztec, crema de cacti; tequila, oily and thermal like the sun in solution; tequila, liquid geometry of passion; Tequila, the buzzard god who copulates in midair with the ascending souls of dying virgins; tequila, firebug in the house of good taste; O tequila, savage water of sorcery, what confusion and mischief your sly, rebellious drops do generate!"
Author: Tom Robbins

50. "I knew I hated straight shots of anything except tequila. I was definitely a tequila girl."
Author: Wendy Higgins

Tequila Quotes Pictures