Wet Dogs Quotes

1. "He writes the worst English that I have ever encountered. It reminds me of a string of wet sponges; it reminds me of tattered washing on the line; it reminds me of stale bean soup, of college yells, of dogs barking idiotically through endless nights. It is so bad that a sort of grandeur creeps into it. It drags itself out of the dark abysm of pish, and crawls insanely up the topmost pinnacle of posh. It is rumble and bumble. It is flap and doodle. It is balder and dash.(writing about US President Warren G. Harding)"
Author: H.L. Mencken

2. "I like girls who like the countryside, put on walking boots and can bend with the wind a bit. If you're going to live with me, you need to be able to embrace the countryside and wet dogs."
Author: Jay Kay

3. "Six-Pack didn't despise George W. Bush to the degree that Ketchum did, but she thought the president was a smirking twerp and a dumbed-down daddy's boy, and she agreed with Ketchum's assessment that Bush would be as worthless as wet crap in even the smallest crisis. If a fight broke out between two small dogs, for example, Ketchum claimed that Bush would call the fire department and ask them to bring a hose; then the president would position himself at a safe distance from the dogfight, and wait for the firemen to show up. The part Pam liked best about this assessment was that Ketchum said the president would instantly look self-important, and would appear to be actively involved--that is, once the firefighters and their hose arrived, and provided there was anything remaining of the mess the two dogs might have made of each other in the interim."
Author: John Irving

4. "After even the first few steps, the disadvantages of the bus ride seemed like small potatoes. 'Small potatoes' is a phrase which has nothing to do with root vegetables that happen to be tiny in size. Instead, it refers to the change in one's feelings for something when it is compared with something else. If you were walking in the rain, for instance, you might be worried about getting wet, but if you turned the corner and saw a pack of vicious dogs, getting wet would suddenly become small potatoes next to getting chased down an alley and barked at, or possibly eaten."
Author: Lemony Snicket

5. "Ma and God God gave us fingers--Ma says, "Use your fork."God gave us voices--Ma says, "Don't scream."Ma says eat broccoli, cereal and carrots.But God gave us tasteys for maple ice cream.God gave us fingers--Ma says, "Use your hanky."God gave us puddles--Ma says, "Don't splash."Ma says, "Be quiet, your father is sleeping."But God gave us garbage can covers to crash.God gave us fingers--Ma says, "Put your gloves on."God gave us raindrops--Ma says, "Don't get wet."Ma says be careful, and don't get too near toThoses strange lovely dogs that God gave us to pet.God gave us fingers--Ma says, "Go wash 'em."But God gave us coal bins and nice dirty bodies.And I ain't too smart, but there's one thing for certain--Either Ma's wrong or else God is."
Author: Shel Silverstein

Wet Dogs Quotes Pictures