Yoda Quotes

1. "You stole my car.""Borrowed it I did, return it I will.""Okay Yoda, can I have the woman whose body you stole back?"
Author: Amelia Hutchins

2. "Say something, Jess. Say anything. And just when I'm about to think of what I should say next, my mouth goes into whacked overdrive like I'm possessed. "The graphic art in Clone Wars is my favorite," I say. "I love how they drew the characters. You know—how everything looks so angular and—" My words tangle and freeze when my brain finally arrives to shut it down. Say something but NOT THAT, you psycho! "Clone Wars. Love it, do I? Yesss." He's actually responded in a Yoda voice! I blink. His eyes are kind, sparkling with laughter and still, all too green. Yoda green!"
Author: Anne Eliot

3. "Everyone's life changes when they meet their Obi-Wan & their Yoda, or their Morpheus & their Oracle; those who help remove the veil."
Author: Brandi L. Bates

4. "His expression changed, and he took a step back. He looked away. "When you said it was broken, you were just being-""No! It is. My phone. Broken." Now she sounded like Yoda on crack."
Author: Brigid Kemmerer

5. "Good find," Ethan said. "Yeah," Jeff agreed. "It's pretty awesome. Like finding the Higgs boson." Silence. "Aw, no physics fans here? Learn things you must," Jeff said in his best Yoda voice. I rolled my eyes."
Author: Chloe Neill

6. "Thank you, Yoda. Feel the force, Luke."
Author: Christopher Pike

7. "Trevor realized that the odd thing about English is that no matter how much you screw sequences word up up, you understood, still, like Yoda, will be. Other languages don't work that way. French? Dieu! Misplace a single le or la and an idea vaporizes into a sonic puff. English is flexible: you can jam it into a Cuisinart for an hour, remove it, and meaning will still emerge."
Author: Douglas Coupland

8. "Mmm, I love Yoda. I didn't like Jar Jar Binks though, he was all wrong."
Author: Gail Porter

9. "Some nights he sat up late on his front porch with a glass of Jack and listened to the trucks heading south on 220, carrying crates of live chickens to the slaughterhouses—always under cover of darkness, like a vast and shameful trafficking—chickens pumped full of hormones that left them too big to walk—and he thought how these same chickens might return from their destination as pieces of meat to the floodlit Bojangles' up the hill from his house, and that meat would be drowned in the bubbling fryers by employees whose hatred of the job would leak into the cooked food, and that food would be served up and eaten by customers who would grow obese and end up in the hospital in Greensboro with diabetes or heart failure, a burden to the public, and later Dean would see them riding around the Mayodan Wal-Mart in electric carts because they were too heavy to walk the aisles of a Supercenter, just like hormone-fed chickens."
Author: George Packer

10. "Amit a moralisták az emberi szív mélységeinek neveznek, voltaképpen csalóka gondolatok, az egyéni érdek önkéntelen rezdülései. Ezek a lelki bonyodalmak, amelyekrol annyi üres szó esik, ezek a hirtelen pálfordulások, nem egyebek élvezeteink javára végzett számításoknál."
Author: Honoré De Balzac

11. "YODA Nay, nay! Try thou not. But do thou or do thou not, For there is no "try."
Author: Ian Doescher

12. "A bat flies straight towards my face. it gives me a perfect view of of possibly one of the ugliest creatures alive. It has long ears and what looks like a piece of salad on the end of its nose. I'm being attacked by Master Yoda with wings!"
Author: J.E. Fison

13. "No offense-but until I see it, I'm not going to believe it.""And that is why you will fail."Adrian cursed and hit the door. "Great, you've got him channeling Yoda again. Can we get moving before he levitates my fucking bike?"
Author: J.R. Ward

14. "Not saving you from this storm, mutant," he said. "Saving you for your later fate, we are."His voice was weirdly inflected and metallic, like an automated answering machine."Oh, good. Yoda captured us," Fang whispered."
Author: James Patterson

15. "Oh great. Yoda captured us."
Author: James Patterson

16. "It's into the same bag as E.T. and Yoda, wherein you're trying to create something that people will actually believe, but it's not so much a symbol of the thing, but you're trying to do the thing itself."
Author: Jim Henson

17. "Lor blows in like he was plastered to the other side of the door."Escort the kid to clean the fuck up and get that stench off her.""Sure thing, boss." He scowls at me.I scowl right back.Lor points through the glass floor. "See that blonde down there with the big tits? I was about to get laid.""One, I'm too young to hear that kind of stuff, and two, I don't see you carrying a club to knock her over the head with, so how were you going to accomplish that?"Behind me, Ryodan laughs."You're ruining my night, kid.""Ditto. Ain't life at Chester's grand."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

18. "I look down. Ryodan's dick is as big as mine. "Why the bloody hell don't you wear underwear?" To an Unseelie prince, an exposed male dick is a call to battle. "They chafe. Too small and confining." "Fuck you," I say."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

19. "It happens when I get really excited. The more excited I get, the more I vibrate.""Now there's a thought," Lor says."If you mean what I think you mean, you want to shut the fuck up and never think it again," Ryodan says."Just saying, boss," Lor says. "You can't tell me you didn't think it, too."I never understand half of what these dudes are talking about and don't care. "You can touch me if you want to," I say to Lor magnanimously. I'm so pumped on adrenaline and excitement that I'm feeling downright sociable. I poke one of my shoulders toward him. "Check me out. It feels really cool."All heads swivel my way, then they look back at Ryodan."He doesn't own my fecking shoulder. Why you looking at him?"
Author: Karen Marie Moning

20. "I look up but don't spot him. "I take care of myself. I ain't living with nobody. Got my own digs. What are you doing up there?" "Tracking the Hag. Trying to devise a way to trap her. She's fast but she's not a sifter." I jerk, and look around warily. That's all we need right now. "Is she here?" "If you brought that crazy bitch near me again." Ryodan doesn't finish his sentence. He doesn't need to."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

21. "All the sudden Ryodan's standing one inch away from me, hand under my chin, holding my face up to his. "You'll never be just anything. A tsunami can never be ‘just' a wave.""Get off my chin.""I like that about you. Waves are banal. Tsunamis reshape the Earth. Under the right circumstances, even entire civilizations."I blink."You're going to be one hell of a woman one day, Dani."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

22. "A Seelie. A fucking prince," Lor said. "He's got a couple hundred more Seelie from a dozen different castes waiting outside. Threatening war. Demanding you shut the place down, stop feeding the Unseelie." I gasped, "V'lane?" "You told him to come!" Ryodan accused. "She knows him?" Lor exploded. "It's her other boyfriend," Ryodan said. "Besides Darroc?" one of the other men demanded. Lor glared at Barrons. "When are you going to wise up and shut that bitch down for good?"
Author: Karen Marie Moning

23. "Barrons fucks you up. Ryodan makes you fuck yourself up."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

24. "When were you in Christian's bed," Ryodan says softly.I gape. "Dude, you got a serious case of selective hearing, the kind that bleeps out all the important stuff! Who cares when I was in his stupid bed? How the feck did you kill Velvet? You been holding out on me! You need to learn to share your weapons!""When."There's something in the way he utters that single word that makes me shiver, and I'm hard to rattle. "So, I didn't change in a convenience store! So, shoot me. I need my sword. What're are you going to do to get it back?"I've never seen Ryodan's face go so smooth. It's like it got iced blank of all expression. I've never heard him talk so soft and silky either. "Take her back to Chester's and lock her down. I'll get the sword."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

25. "She thinks he's not an animal like Barrons. That he's more civilized. She right, he is more polished. But it only makes him more dangerous. With Barrons you expect to get fucked up royally. With Ryodan you don't see it coming."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

26. "I hear a guttural sound followed by a weak sigh and look back at the bodies. "I'm going to kill the kid," Barrons says faintly. Ryodan makes a burbling sound like a bloody laugh. I don't think he even has the parts left to laugh with. "Get in line."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

27. "I look at Ryodan and he looks at me and for a second I think we might both kill the kid. Ryodan's more stone-faced than usual, if that's possible without turning to concrete, and his fangs are out. I look down. Ryodan's sick is as big as mine. "Why the bloody hell don't you wear underwear?" To an Unseelie Prince an exposed male dick is a call to battle."They chafe. Too small and confining.""Fuck you," I say."Dudes. Get over yourselves," the kid says."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

28. "Dani: Crank it up. Lets get this party started. *I hand Dancer my iPod.* Lor: What is this crap. Where the hell is Hendrix on this thing?Jo: Did you get any Muse?Dani: Muse is something you doJo: Distrubed is something you areDancer: And Godsmacked is something you getLor: Don't you have any Motley Crue or Van Halen?Christian: How about some Flogging Molly?Ryodan: Whats the deal with all the Linkin Park, for fuck's sake.Dancer: Mega has a crush on ChesterJo: You got any Adele?Dani: Got some Nicki Minaj.Ryodan: Somebody kill me now."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

29. "Sloppy, Mega," I mutter. I still can't see. I wipe my bloody nose on my sleeve and reach out to feel what I hit."That's my dick," Ryodan says. I snatch my hand away. "Gah!" I choke out. I can feel my face again—because, like, it's going up in flames. What kind of universe makes me reach out at exactly that fecking level to feel what I think is a wall and puts my hand on a penis?Then I remember this is Ryodan and scowl. "You did that on purpose!" I accuse. "You saw my hand go out and you stepped right into it!" "I'd do that why, kid?"
Author: Karen Marie Moning

30. "Stop. Vibrating." Ryodan plucks a paper out of the air and slaps it back down on his desk.I wonder if he cleans it. How many tushes have been on that thing? I'm never touching it again. "Can't help it," I say around a mouthful of candy bar. I know what I look like: a smudge of black leather and hair. "It happens when I get really excited. The more excited I get, the more I vibrate.""Now there's a thought," Lor says."If you mean what I think you mean, you want to shut the fuck up and never think it again," Ryodan says."Just saying, boss," Lor says. "You can't tell me you didn't think it, too."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

31. "Dani, Dani, Dani."I flinch. I've never heard anyone say my name so gently. It creeps me all kinds of out.He's towering over me, arms crossed over his chest, scarred forearms dark against the rolled-up sleeves of a crisp white shirt.Heavy silver cuffs glint at both wrists. The light is smack behind his head, as usual."You didn't really think I'd let you get away with it," Ryodan says."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

32. "Turn it off," Ryodan says without even looking at me. "You're distressing Dani. No one distresses Dani but me."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

33. "-I'm going to kill the kid. - Barrons says faintly.Ryodan makes a burbling sound like a bodly laught. -Get in line"
Author: Karen Marie Moning

34. "The more excited I get, the more I vibrate.""Now there's a thought," Lor says."If you mean what I think you mean, you want to shut the fuck up and never think it again," Ryodan says."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

35. "Seen runes like these before, Barrons?" Ryodan said. "No. You?" Barrons said. "New to me. Could be useful." I heard the sound of a phone taking pictures. Then I heard the sound of a phone being crushed against rock. "Are you out of your mind?" Ryodan said disbelievingly. "That was my phone." "Possibly," Jo said. "But no one records anything here." "Crush something of mine again, I'll crush your skill." "I weary of you," Jo said. "I weary of your ass, too, sidhe-seer," Ryodan growled."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

36. "Velvet looks horrified. "If you are fool enough to address King R'jan, you will do it thus and in no other manner! ‘My King, Liege, Lord, and Master, your servant begs you grant it leave to speak.'""Wow. Totally delusionary there.""Good luck with that," Ryodan says. "She doesn't beg to speak, or do anything else. You can lock her up, down, and sideways and it's never going to happen."I beam at him. I had no idea he thought so highly of me."
Author: Karen Marie Moning

37. "He makes it sound so Zen. Or Jedi. Like some kind of Wolf Yoda. There is no try. And maybe that's all there is to it. Don't over-think the shift. Just embrace the form that I want to be in."
Author: Kat Kruger

38. "But this hunch is all we have to go on, and every time I question him about feasibility, he smiles at me like he's Yoda and I'm just a dumbass without the Force."
Author: Kendare Blake

39. "Hey! When he dug into it, rifling through her things, she snapped, "Go Yoda someone else's supplies, asshole."
Author: Kresley Cole

40. "I handed my tools. The two of them reached down to help me out of the crater I'd dug. ''Isn't that a little deep?'' Yoda asked. ''It'll help the roots get established,'' I explained. ''Established where? China?"
Author: Laurie Halse Anderson

41. "Of all the Jedis I saw in the film, Yoda's the only one I like."
Author: Lawrence Halprin

42. "Maxine," Grant said, but I barely heard him. I was lost in that vision, in those emotions—the pain, and hunger for pain, forming the root of so muchagonized rage." ‘Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate,'" I muttered."Yoda, from Star Wars?"" ‘Hate leads to suffering.'" I met his gaze. "Yoda knows his shit, man."Grant's mouth crooked in a gentle smile."
Author: Marjorie M. Liu

43. "Now Obi Wan did face him.'Palpatine faced Mace and Agen and Kit and Saesee-four of the greatest swordsmen our order has ever produced. By Himself. Even both of us together wouldn't have a chance.''True,' Yoda said, 'But both of us apart, a chance we might create..."
Author: Matthew Woodring Stover

44. "Sorry, sometimes when I try to rhyme I end up sounding like Yoda."
Author: Penny Reid

45. ""Get it you will. Worry you don't," he said in a weird voice."Are you possessed?" Aislynn asked, making Jace throw back his head in laughter. "Did you just develop a speech impediment? Oh my God! Are you having a stroke? Is that why you can't talk right?" "Yoda is going to be so pissed. May the force protect you, because he sure won't."
Author: Phoebe Lane

46. "Erik grinned. "Do or do not. There is no try."Only Erik would quote Yoda in bed."
Author: Piper Vaughn

47. "When single you are," Roger said, imitating Yoda dispensing advice to Luke, "get laid you can. When married you get, make love you do."
Author: Sean Kennedy

48. "Don't let the past ruin your future. (Acheron)Meaning what, oh great Yoda? (Kyrian)You take care of the kid. I'll take care of your patrol tonight. I could use the target practice. (Acheron)"
Author: Sherrilyn Kenyon

49. "A Master Jedi feels emotions, but they do not allow them to influence their reasoning. Yoda told Luke that he would know the good from the bad when he was 'calm, at peace."
Author: Stephen Richards

50. "And her eyes, violet, like the sky before a storm. Ralph and Trish had brown eyes. Max's were hazel. But Ondine. No, Ondine's eyes had to be purple, wide set, and heavily lashed. Beyonce and Yoda's love child."
Author: Tara Bray Smith

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