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Top Tim Allen Quotes

Browse top 24 most favorite famous quotes and sayings by Tim Allen.

Favorite Tim Allen Quotes

1. "Anyway, they used to beat up on Barry all the time. They called it roughhousing, which is like men calling lying bullshitting." ~ Tim Allen
2. "You are a sad, strage little man." ~ Tim Allen
3. "One thing you'll never hear boys--or for that matter, men--saying is, "Charlie, that's a good-looking shirt. Kind of a fun thing. And those trousers make your ass look nice. Can I borrow those?" ~ Tim Allen
4. "Nothing's as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families." ~ Tim Allen
5. "I do a lot of family shows." ~ Tim Allen
6. "I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults." ~ Tim Allen
7. "I love doing logos. I've been a graphic artist all my life." ~ Tim Allen
8. "I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car." ~ Tim Allen
9. "I'm a creative guy, artistically with graphics." ~ Tim Allen
10. "When somebody tells you they're not very smart, they're saying exactly the opposite." ~ Tim Allen
11. "While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously." ~ Tim Allen
12. "Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom." ~ Tim Allen
13. "Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive." ~ Tim Allen
14. "Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon." ~ Tim Allen
15. "You don't know what people are really like until they're under a lot of stress." ~ Tim Allen
16. "The world's a mean place. It's unfair, then it's fair. It's hateful, then it's loving. It's a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels." ~ Tim Allen
17. "Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded." ~ Tim Allen
18. "I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children." ~ Tim Allen
19. "My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance." ~ Tim Allen
20. "Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work, or prison." ~ Tim Allen
21. "Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end.' Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me." ~ Tim Allen
22. "I have a thing for tools." ~ Tim Allen
23. "I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I've never gotten over it." ~ Tim Allen
24. "Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything." ~ Tim Allen

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Today's Quote

No deep and strong feeling, such as we may come across here and there in the world, is unmixed with compassion. The more we love, the more the object of our love seems to us to be a victim."
Author: Boris Pasternak

What Did Tim Allen Talk About?

Hey
Thin
Wit
Ear
End
Use
Ten
Sit
Sing
Sin
Lie
Child

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